2012 - I'll save you all

reply to post by DerepentLEstranger


I predict DerepentEstranger will have an accident soon. Accidents happen to those foolish enough to not believe. All praise nOOb! All hail The Church of nOOb!

reply to post by billy197300


He will surely go to the whining underworld to suffer for eternity from pissed of women on PMS. Only way is to follow the one and only, son of the N00bness, our Holy saviour. Repent now! otherwise you will surely be killed in the 2012 N00bpocalypse.

ha ha too many posts to keep track of

It's now official.

We even have a couple of recruits.

The Church of nOOb

And Behold because Noob cast all the 2012 demons away he took his disciples to the Dog and Duck and anointed his friends with 12 pints of Stella to wash away all memory of the 2012 doomsayers.
Huzzah his first disciple Boymonkey cried as he excreted the 2012 vomit from his being.
Then all was good.
Book of Noob chapter 2 verse 1.



Lol getting the hang of writing Holy books now

What if we did not want to be saved???

Now we have to keep on living in this hell-hole, all because you had to go and save the planet...

Good job Noob...Good job.

Originally posted by n00bUK
This post is deadly serious! Not to be taken lightly..

Today ATS, I start my task of making sure the world does not end on the 21st of December, its a hard task which could take my life at any given second, I have allot to loose, my daughter, my misses, my overly expensive mortage and last but not least - All you special people, I do this for us.

So If you wake up on the 22nd, you will know that I, Leon Gibson, saved the[snip]world. I will accept any kind of gift as a token of appreciation for the saving of planet earth. Let my name be immortalized in greatness and remembered as the person out of 7 Billion that stopped the world from ending.

Post- 21st December your whole existance will be soly down to me. Thank me later, now I start my task, wish me luck. See you on the other side, ATS

Too late. I already took care of it last Christmastime, and it was a harrowing experience let me tell you. It's not easy navigating the Revelation of John and getting to the end of the Bible (spirit and the bride) without falling victim to all kinds of things and all manner of spiritual attack. I'm the real hero, no strike that, Jesus was and remains the real hero, but you're right that it's all for us.

reply to post by knowledgedesired


Well Well what have we here? a N00b-Atheist? you do not believe in our saviour? you shall be put to torment.

"Ye shall not deny me, but i shall shower you with free will, but i shall say the last word, but free will....peace" - The Book of n00b, Verse 7.1

reply to post by NewAgeMan


In the latest census report (done an hour ago) 35% of so called Christians have rejected Christ and took up Noobism.
Huzzah!

reply to post by NewAgeMan


What part of "There is no god but N00blord and N00bUK is his prophet" don't you understand?

All religion is False, N00bism is the one and only way for salvation.

reply to post by n00bUK


Trying to take credit for what I was going to do Oh well, hope you get rich. I'll send you a bill for my services.

reply to post by NewAgeMan


BLASPHEMY! No strippers and booze for you!
Tui Gratia Iovis Gratia Sit Cura!
Tui Gratia Iovis Gratia Sit Cura!
Tui Gratia Iovis Gratia Sit Cura!

Originally posted by billy197300
reply to post by NewAgeMan

 

BLASPHEMY! No strippers and booze for you!
Tui Gratia Iovis Gratia Sit Cura!
Tui Gratia Iovis Gratia Sit Cura!
Tui Gratia Iovis Gratia Sit Cura!

"Let the Grace of Jupiter Be the Cure for Your Sake!"

Thank you. Jupiter is the King of the Planets, which performed some interesting signs in marking the conception and birth of Jesus Christ.

And if the world does end on 12-21 nobody will be here to praise noob.

Altho I don't need saving thanks anyway.because the world isn't going to end.

I was told to beware of false prophets.

The Book of nOOb verse 6.9


“Moreover, We shall join them to companions With beautiful, big and lustrous boobs.”
“...And We shall join them to companions, with large mugs of ale.”
“Companions restrained (as to their glances), in goodly Lil Mynx Spinning Stripper Poles .”

Originally posted by NewAgeMan

Originally posted by billy197300
reply to post by NewAgeMan

 

BLASPHEMY! No strippers and booze for you!
Tui Gratia Iovis Gratia Sit Cura!
Tui Gratia Iovis Gratia Sit Cura!
Tui Gratia Iovis Gratia Sit Cura!

"Let the Grace of Jupiter Be the Cure for Your Sake!"

Thank you. Jupiter is the King of the Planets, which performed some interesting signs in marking the conception and birth of Jesus Christ.

Bow before nOOb and praise him. All Hail Noob, Strategos of the Cosmos, God of Jupiter!!!!!!!

reply to post by neo96


While sleeping the disciple Boymonkey saw what happens to the people who reject the word of noob,they would be cast into Brighouse west yorkshire where they will spend eternity drinking with the people in weatherspoons and they will cry "Why Why did we not listen to Noob"
So Boymonkeys threat to the unbeliever is accept noob or spend eons in Brighouse.
Book of Noob chapter 7 verse 3.

In addition to the written scriptures we have an "Oral nOOb," a tradition explaining what the above scriptures mean and how to interpret them and apply the Laws of nOOb. Orthodox nOObians believe nOOb taught the Oral nOOb to nOObUK, and he taught it to others, down to the present day. This tradition was maintained only in oral form until about 12-12-12., when the oral law was compiled and written down in a document called the The Book of nOOb.

We must save as much as possible before the N00bpocalypse! Spread the word!

Originally posted by luciddream
We must save as much as possible before the N00bpocalypse! Spread the word!

As the second disciple I am responsible for forcibly shoving my new found faith down everyone's throat that I know and ridiculing them for using logic and thinking for themselves. PRAISE nOOb!