[2013] The Diary of The Walk.

The Diary of The Walk.

December 25th 2012

Merry Christmas, children. I miss you all.

Its been 4 days since it happened, its been 4 days since I lost everything, since I lost everyone. What happened I don't know but it feels as if God has died. Life is missing from the world. A force that binds the living to this mortal realm was severed and everyone left. Everyone except me. For some reason I am still here. I wonder if I am the wicked, the wicked that was to be left behind.

Since my family left this plane, I have been walking. Trying to find the reasons why I have been forsaken. Why I have been thrown into the pits of solitude. I am yet to find the answer. The scenery is as dead as the souls that once walked among it. If God was life and life was colour then I am sure that God is gone. The only sounds I have heard are that of my own and it is that, which scares me the most.

Am I to be here forever? Am I destined to walk the fragile Earth alone for the rest of eternity? I would take my own life if I were a braver man. If this was Gods Earth then what must heaven look like.

For now I walk.....

December 31st 2012

I think its new years, but no matter. Time is irrelevant in this place. There is no night, only day.

I am starting to believe that it is I that who has died, surely it must be this way, for I am in hell. The sound of silence grows ever louder, my eyes disgusted at the lack of colour are starting to lose there most basic of functions. My body, my vessel is starting to wane. My legs feel heavy under the burden of hope. Yes, hope. Hope for answers. Hope for a sign. Hope for help. Hope for guidance. Hope is the only nourishment my mind depends upon. I will not break.

I will walk.

January 3rd 2013

solace. Solace. I have seen colour, beautiful colour. A leaf, the most basic of God creations. It is green, crisp, bright. It is the colour of life, the colour of the creator. I have decided to carry this piece of lasting life. I have decided to become its disciple. I have decided to use it as a beacon. A beacon of hope.

Together we walk.

January 10th 2013

It is final.

Colour has gone. The leaf was but a convulsion of life into death, and with it I too fall. Hope is no longer enough to sustain my body. The notion of an answer is no longer enough to keep my spirit from kneeling, from succumbing to the totality of death. My only optimism is that in the darkness I find sound, I find colour, I find love.

I will walk till I do.

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A song I feel suits the story well.

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