reply to post by feelingconnected
AA helped me, when ever I had a desire to drink, I went, at first it was often, then as I became sober and the symptoms subsided, I found I went less,
now, I don't go, if I do it will be to help others. I am not going to tell you what you should do, that's up to you, I would suggest you give him an
ultimatum, it worked for my Grandfather, my Grandmother said she was going to leave him and take the kids, my Grandfather stopped cold turkey, if your
husband truly loves you, he will stop when given a choice, I'm sure he loves you and the kids very much, Alcoholics are very intelligent, very
sensitive, yet alcohol magnifies emotions and fears, your husband is probably very scared, he knows that if he were to become sober he would find
himself confronted with the reality of how he hurt his family both emotionally and financially and who is and what he has become.
That's what is so horrible about alcoholism, it becomes an escape until it's too late, you end up dead, divorced, or poor, it takes time, alcohol is
very deceptive, it made me think everything was honky dory and then I crashed, I crashed hard. My heart goes out to you and your family, I liken
alcoholics as having an allergic reaction, yet my allergy consumed me. Remember it starts with that first day, if your husband can remain sober for
one day, he can do it again, and again, but there are side effects: shakes, anger, sleeplessness, nightmares, they vary, but they will go away, then
The great thing is that his health will improve and so will yours, your husband is still young, if he does agree to give up alcohol, go to a meeting,
you don't have to go to one place, try others until you feel comfortable, the stories do help, they will build up your confidence and you will
appreciate your situation, you will thank your lucky stars that it wasn't like some stories you will hear, take your kids, I can't tell you how much
I would have loved to have had someone to go with me, you don't have to make it an every day thing, go when the wave comes over him, agree to have
him tell you when it does, or keep an eye on him, or ask him, then go!
Once the side effects subside, and they will, your husband will become a new man, trust me, it's an epiphany. Enjoy your family, go for a walk, go
for a drive, reward yourselves as a family, reward your husband with things or activities he likes, never give up hope, your husband needs to be
brought back from limbo, he will need you, but only if he is willing to try, alcohol puts one in a stupor between life and death, it's always pulling
one away from life, he needs to learn to love life again, you, his family, and himself!
I am praying for everyone on here, I hate alcoholism, it broke me, it robbed me of life, it robbed me of relationships, it robbed me of a family and
kids, I thought I had it all under control and then I woke up in a holding facility, humiliated, never again, I am praying for you, don't give up,
but don't let yourself nor your kids go under too, it can be a destroyer of all things and sometimes it's pull is too great, and it will win, so be
careful, and know when to stop helping others and when to help yourself for your kids sake, God bless!