My first experience of "contact"

Originally posted by Dragonfly79

Originally posted by SyntheticPerception
I am not looking for support by coming here. I am looking to raise awareness for others, or someone who may experience something like I went through. I follow my heart now, not my mind now.

edit on 22-11-2012 by SyntheticPerception because: (no reason given)

Just wanted to wish you good luck with your contacts, take it easy and don't do anything which will get you into the 'nuthouse'.

Thank you for the kind words. I am in a totally different place now. In the beginning everything was new to me, I have had plenty of time to adapt to my situation. The "nut house" was needed, I do believe it could have been handled better, but looking back it was necessary. Hard to explain I suppose.

For instance some things baffled me, or the "reasoning" behind certain actions they took. Here is just one example. After waking up the second day, they showed me a room I was allowed to "lock" myself in if I felt unsafe. It sounds "positive" but if you look again there is also a "negative" in that suggestion.

I decided to lock myself in the room

Probably the best thing for me to do for my safety while handling the psychosis. The reason I say things could have been handled "better" was little examples like the following.

During the second day they offered me some material to draw with or do "artsy" projects. I jump on the idea. The problem with this was I later found myself locked in a room with sharp pens and pencils.. Now I was able to refrain from hurting myself thankfully.. and I am sure they had a "key" to unlock the door. Still I could have easily injured myself with the objects before they had time to unlock the door. The room (all of the rooms) had video surveillance, but it did not appear someone was always watching them.

There's nothing wrong with the mind, for example how about the mind imagines the heart and a suitable situation for love to express itself?

I agree totally.

We "need" the mind in a sense to express what we consider love. However, I also believe it is easy for us as humans to get caught up in the "labels" of the mind. When you truly feel and "see" love, you begin to notice in many more places.

As with anything balance is the key. For me personally I have spent looking at the world only through the "mind", hence my need to start looking at the world through my heart more. This hasn't changed how I interact with the world or those around me, just the way I see the world.

reply to post by kera1337


Kundalini doesn' t make you see your arm as an alien arm!

Originally posted by gnosticagnostic
reply to post by SyntheticPerception

 

Thanks for sharing your experience. I'm a confessed die-hard skeptic and I have heard many things working for a psychiatrist however(back in the day) I believe you are quite sincere in your experience and i do hope you share more. It is really fascinating.

Thank you for the kind words, I promise you I am being sincere. After my first "intake" a few months after getting out of the "nut house" I heard the psychiatrist say something to a co-worker that interested me. At the time I was not quite sure what he had meant.

You have to remember I was just told I had to go on social security disability to afford the medicine I would now have to take for the rest of my life. After all I had a "debilitating brain condition" Being told that ~ really screws with your mind ~

He said " I just had a very humbling experience", to a co-worker when I was filling out my paper work on the medication. He didn't see me standing on the other side of the room. I understand why my words had humbled him now, and I am glad they did.

Originally posted by Coopdog
reply to post by SyntheticPerception

 

It sounds as if you may have experienced a spontaneous release of '___' by your pinneal gland. The phantom arm and hand and the changing of your reality sort of fit with the symptoms of a spontaneous release. Many people who have near death experiences can relate to what you are saying even to the point of conversing with another being in your head. You don't have to be schizophrenic to hear voices or hallucinate. Both can happen naturally with no outside stimuli.

I had a near death experience as a teenager many years ago. During my psychosis part of "me" relived that experience. I have read about the "phantom arm experience etc, but this experience I mentioned here is different. The "phantom arm" is more like what I am experiencing lately. This "contact" was two years ago.


It is funny you mentioned the '___'. That is how I tried explaining some of the "visions" I have had. All of my hallucinations have been natural, so this made sense to me. This would be for another thread though. I do not view the "visions" as prophetic, they seem more so personal in nature and explain things about my "past".

How you react to it can make the difference between spending time in a nuthouse or becoming the more complete and sensitive human being you were meant to be.

Exactly, thank you. It is hard to explain in words.. but in the beginning when I said "This experience has changed me. Or perhaps a better way of saying it is, this experience has changed me into the person I have always been."

Loving others and respecting them has always been natural for me. I didn't have to "learn" that. What I did have to learn was how to love myself. I think that speaks more for the programing our/my mind received "growing up".

end result is that I spend much of my life in a rapturous and joyful state that others find very enjoyable to be around. Good luck with your experiences and you don't sound crazy to me. You sound like you have more exploration to do before it all falls into place for you. You may be on a spiritual path and not even realize it.

Again thank you for the support and loving words

I have grown much in these few years.From the very start this was a spiritual path so to speak.. but my (logical) mind still puts up a fight.

I no longer swim upstream, that is for sure.

I spend much of my life in a rapturous and joyful state that others find very enjoyable

For the past few months this is the state I find myself in

However, I am a bit of a hermit. It is hard to relate with people around me for the most part. I got told by my psychology professor that I have a very good "energy". I did not expect that compliment

Originally posted by LittleByLittle
reply to post by SyntheticPerception

I might be projecting but I have a few questions. Did you experiance the fear as extreamly intense and are you unable to feel real fear anymore, like that you are totaly fearless? I do not meant that you cannot be uncomfortable but the possability to experiance biological fear is gone?

The reason I am asking is to figure out if you have gone thru a amagydala fear overload.

Hmm.. I had never thought about things that way. Even if it was a "projection" it was a very insightful one.

I would not say "fearless" is the right word. I still experience "fear" at times. For instance deciding to share this experience I would describe as "fear". A better word for it would be a feeling of "persecution".. the fact these things are intimate in nature make it hard to feel "excited" to share.

Now if I think about "death" or "dying" I do not experience any fear at all'. I have felt death many times and in many form over the past two years. When I encounter "contacts" the fear is still there to some extent (mentally).. but not at the same extent.

As time progresses it becomes more "natural". It happens most often when I put trust in my intuition about my surroundings.

Thanks again for the thought provoking question. This helps me "sort" things out in my mind.

Originally posted by sebHFX
reply to post by kera1337

 

Kundalini doesn' t make you see your arm as an alien arm!

LOL thank you for the reply. I agree with that assessment.

I believe I have encountered kundalini during other experiences.. none of those involved an alien arm of any kind.

reply to post by ProperlyErrant


Thank you for sharing your experiences and for this..

You have to remember, some people could get bitch slapped by an alien right across the face, and they'd still not believe in aliens.

This sounds like some sort of OBE/Astral Projection (with a twist ) If you research it, you will find that before people achieve a OBE/AP they often must first achieve a trance state which often has similar symptoms to what you described.

Originally posted by _Phoenix_
This sounds like some sort of OBE/Astral Projection (with a twist

) If you research it, you will find that before people achieve a OBE/AP they often must first achieve a trance state which often has similar symptoms to what you described.

edit on 22-11-2012 by _Phoenix_ because: (no reason given)

I agree.

This first experience was not (IMO) an astral travel or OBE. I have experienced those after this for sure. This was during the beginning stages of meditation. The experience In the OP was different from other "visions" and possible "astral travels" I have had since. Those have always involved patterns of light that I seen as a child. After the "contact" above these lights came back. It was comforting on some level for me, they were my childhood friends. I was sad when they left me back then.

I know that sounds ridiculous.

This first experience was not (IMO) an astral travel or OBE. I have experienced those after this for sure. This was during the beginning stages of meditation. The experience In the OP was different from other "visions" and possible "astral travels" I have had since. Those have always involved patterns of light that I seen as a child. After the "contact" above these lights came back. It was comforting on some level for me, they were my childhood friends. I was sad when they left me back then.

I know that sounds ridiculous.

edit on 22-11-2012 by SyntheticPerception because: (no reason given)

I'm going to ask you a few questions if you don't mind... because I too, remember colors of light as a child. I would see shapes of different colors and sizes float around my room like a disco ball. It's kind of hard to explain, but I am pretty sure I went to disneyland once when I was a kid.. I mean I woke up like I had been there but I hadn't really been there nor have a been to this day but I can tell you everything about it when i was 5. lol.. You say things started to "come together" before your "psychosis".. what kind of things do you remember? Did you have any strange sensory perceptions besides just visual things.. hearing, touch, taste?? were you more sensitive or have any ringing in your ears?

I have a thread (in my signature) where a member posted an experience of having an alien "in" her/him...

Then my friend called him away, he moved back and what I learnt afterwards is that at this point my friend called him away because she saw something come out of my left eye, it was like a grey tentacle that then splayed out over the left side of my face and moulded itself into a similar alien face as she had reported in her abduction those many years ago. I don't recall feeling anything, but she saw what she described as a bald grey alien face, but it had a long hooked nose and eyes that she described as 'black lensed Dame Edna Everidge glasses'. his apparition can't have lasted more than a few seconds, because shortly after her son moved away from me, I was suddenly free to move.

on this post: www.abovetopsecret.com...

I also have a friend, Alfred2012, who has had contacts with ETs and spirits, and has been told a lot about "things". He even put up a great website about his experiences:
www.the-starpeople.net...?lang=de It is in German, but if you have Google Chrome, you can hit the translator button to read it.

I don't think you are alone in your experiences. Thanks for sharing.

reply to post by gnosticagnostic

I'm going to ask you a few questions if you don't mind...

Please do.. I am hoping this post will bring me into contact with people who have experienced similar things.

I would see shapes of different colors and sizes float around my room like a disco ball. It's kind of hard to explain

The only color of lights I encountered at a child were purple. They could best be described at "grape like" bunches or "globes" of light. As a kid all I really remember was "playing" with them. By that I mean kinda dancing ~ floating around me, playing "tag" etc.

I remember them forming into certain shapes or patterns (they still do this but I choose when to see them now, i can find no practical use for them? sometimes I just stare at them and watch them move around, sometimes they react to thought or emotion)

What "emotions" do you remember feeling about these lights?

I have certain "random" memories from as young as 5 months old. They were confirmed by my mom, so I know I am not making this stuff up. Some of the things I remember from back then shocked her.

I am pretty sure I went to disneyland once when I was a kid.. I mean I woke up like I had been there but I hadn't really been there nor have a been to this day but I can tell you everything about it when i was 5.

I do not remember anything like that, but I do not think it is something you just made up, or dreamed about as a kid.

I do have a question for you. You mentioned the age of 5 in your post. Do you remember any "lucid" dreams from around that age?

I have a set of dreams that have stuck with me to this day, they lasted for a period of a week. My sister (I just discovered) had this same dream too. I don't want to give the detail of the dream yet, I want to see if you had something similar.

Long shot here ~ but do any of these "things" relate to your grandmother? Or your grandmothers house?

You say things started to "come together" before your "psychosis".. what kind of things do you remember?

This would be hard to describe in detail without taking up tons of space Some of it is just seeing things from this new perspective, other things are more "physical". For instance always waking up in the opposite manner that I fell asleep, stuff like that.

When when connections get made it feels like more "information" seeps through from my subconscious into awareness.

Did you have any strange sensory perceptions besides just visual things.. hearing, touch, taste?? were you more sensitive or have any ringing in your ears?

To put simply yes.

Hearing, touch, taste, smell, vision. All of them, The ringing in the ears started before all of this but I just shook it off. Two years later this has increased immensely, The "ringing" will sometimes reverberate through my whole body.

Sometimes it comes with "information" you could say.. hard to put into words. I had a few experiences a year ago when this was still "new" to me. I had to ask for a break because it was to much for me to handle. This was another experience of "contact" I suppose.

The following day I slept for 30+ hours. To get into that right now would take more time to explain.

What have you experienced as far as ringing ears, etc?

Thanks for sharing your experiences!

reply to post by sled735


Thank you for the "links" and for the kind words, it is easy to feel alone with things (at least for me). When I have the time to properly look at the information I will most definitely give it a read.

reply to post by SyntheticPerception


Wow I'm seriously a little shaken up right now.. The ringing in my ears started back up a few months ago. I "know" what it is. I had it as a child and thought I outgrew it. When it came back, I tried to rationalize it as tinnitus in my old age even though i knew and still know it is not.. It is a constant ring that.. for lack of a better definition "tells" me things. I don't hear voices or anything I just feel things/ like a 6th sense or some would say a woman's intuition.

I don't know if the shapes have anything to do with my grandmother's house although I was thinking about her for some reason when I typed about it. I do remember having recurring dreams about my grandmothers house... It had a basement that we used to hang out in ( the grandkids that is) in my dream I would always go into a door either under the stairs ( which didn't exist in reality) or go through a back room through what I can only say would be a series of weird mazes and tunnels to other rooms and places.. but i'm not sure what happened once I got to the end of it or if I ever did.. I only remember the going there. I was never scared or afraid in the dreams or in the reality but sometimes anxious but not fearful or anything.

reply to post by gnosticagnostic


Don't be shaken up

I look at it as a kind of "vibrational" help. I ignored it for awhile too. Honestly I do not think we even need to be aware of it on some levels. When it happens now I take notice and "still" my mind and just let the vibrations run through me, before it was always just a "ring in the ears" now it extends to different parts of my body. Mainly the solar plexus area it seems currently. After I say "thank you" in my mind lol

I didn't really mean the "shapes" more so dreams you wold have back then. Did you stay at your grandmothers house as a kid for a short period of time?

The maze you mention is interesting. Check my post about a recent dream I had. "Who or What are the Nines" You may find it interesting.

I will describe my (childhood) dream later when I get back online. I want to see if you can relate to it on some level. It will sound silly

reply to post by SyntheticPerception

I never lived with my grandmother or the house with the dreams in it( that was my father's side).. for a brief period once when I was about 3 i'm going to say, my mother left my dad for a week and we stayed with that grandmother for a week. Now that i think about it no one has ever mentioned that in the family.. ( it was 35 years ago) I do remember the lights at that grandma's house too but I was 3 and they moved out of that house when I was around 4 or 5 i think. But that was the house of the african violets my grandma liked to have..( she didn't have them after the move though) but i remember the intricate light system to grow them and I was not to touch them lol. I'm sure your dream isn't silly. I don't really remember dreams now days.

Originally posted by SyntheticPerception
reply to post by gnosticagnostic

 

I didn't really mean the "shapes" more so dreams you wold have back then. Did you stay at your grandmothers house as a kid for a short period of time?

The maze you mention is interesting. Check my post about a recent dream I had. "Who or What are the Nines" You may find it interesting.

edit on 22-11-2012 by SyntheticPerception because: (no reason given)

edit on 22-11-2012 by SyntheticPerception because: (no reason given)

ok i went to go check out your other threads.. ( honestly this is the first one i've read of yours) so i was not familiar with your dream before I told you of my recurring dream.. i say recurring because i've had that dream as an adult but it's been along time and it's not with other people.. it's like "training" to get through the maze.. practice of sorts i suppose although I have no idea what for.. and there are things along the way to distract me. objects but i never remember them exactly just that the objects placed mean something to me and are to get me to stop/slow in the maze. Nor have a ever seen the movie the nines.. i don't think i've even heard of it.. ( i'm not really big into movies) but the nines in history refer to the egyptian house of ra.. or the great house of egyptian kings and I gotta admit a little fascination with egypt and at one time was going to get a tattoo of the eye of ra ( eye of horus) until I was talked out of it.. lol.

reply to post by gnosticagnostic

I never lived with my grandmother or the house with the dreams in it( that was my father's side)

The grandmother I lived with (for a brief period) was from my fathers side. Not sure why I even brought up the grandmother thing really. Have you ever had communication from relatives who have "passed"?

Now that i think about it no one has ever mentioned that in the family

I don't want to seem like I am getting to personal or anything. If you don't want to answer this I understand.

What do you mean by "no one ever mentioned that"?

I do remember the lights at that grandma's house too but I was 3 and they moved out of that house when I was around 4 or 5 i think. But that was the house of the african violets my grandma liked to have..( she didn't have them after the move though) but i remember the intricate light system to grow them and I was not to touch them lol.

Just for fun do you remember anything else about these african violets or the light system perhaps? This paragraph interested me, I enjoy hearing about different gardening adventures.

I'm sure your dream isn't silly. I don't really remember dreams now days

.


If you are interested check the link in my signature, There is a natural supplement that may help you possibly.

It was a lucid dream that lasted about four days revolving "giant" type creatures. They were scary looking but were actually very fun and loving. Getting into the details wouldn't matter much. I am hoping to find "others" who remember the same "themes" around the age of 5 or so. Both me and my sister had these same lucid dreams around that age.

How old are you by the way? Just curious

reply to post by gnosticagnostic

nines in history refer to the egyptian house of ra.. or the great house of egyptian kings and I gotta admit a little fascination with egypt and at one time was going to get a tattoo of the eye of ra ( eye of horus) until I was talked out of it.. lol.

Yea.. The Egyptian thing keeps turning up. Some of the "visions" I have had the Egyptian symbology in them. Around this time you could say I was "directed" towards something called the Ra Material, or The Law of One. At times I thought possible contact from that social memory complex was hapening. I don't know how to begin an explanation that wold make sense.

The grandmother I lived with (for a brief period) was from my fathers side. Not sure why I even brought up the grandmother thing really. Have you ever had communication from relatives who have "passed"?

I felt my grandmother ( fathers side) with me for about a year after she passed but i cannot say we had communication but sometimes things would happen or i would feel her stern eye on me.. lol

Now that i think about it no one has ever mentioned that in the family

I don't want to seem like I am getting to personal or anything. If you don't want to answer this I understand.

What do you mean by "no one ever mentioned that"?

I don't think its a memory that someone told me happened.. I remember it plainly and I know I was about 3 years old.. Who remembers things when they are 3? anywho I mentioned that no one told me that my mom left my dad for a week during that time frame .. my family really doesn't reminisce much nor does my mother/father really talk about things like that. I once asked my older brother if he remembered that because I wanted to verify it as a valid memory of my own.. and he was suprised I could remember it because he was only 7 and didn't remember it until I mentioned it.

Just for fun do you remember anything else about these african violets or the light system perhaps? This paragraph interested me, I enjoy hearing about different gardening adventures.

um the lighting system had 3 levels and purple light bulbs.. something about the light had to be purple to make the flowers more vibrant er something.. i dunno i'm not a grower of african violets lol.

It was a lucid dream that lasted about four days revolving "giant" type creatures. They were scary looking but were actually very fun and loving. Getting into the details wouldn't matter much. I am hoping to find "others" who remember the same "themes" around the age of 5 or so. Both me and my sister had these same lucid dreams around that age.

How old are you by the way? Just curious

I was born in 1974. How old are you? I do remember Nephilim dreams probably around first grade or so..( is that 6?) my mom thought it was because of gullivers travels but i didn't know what she was talking about. I don't really remember them in detail so I won't say they were lucid dreams or how long they lasted. Just that they about really big people but then I was a child so everyone was seemingly big. lol