I am lucky. Very lucky.

Everything seemed to be going great until I found myself again. I thought girl whom I am still with - for a very short while longer - taught me a lot about myself and what I want. And to think I came so close to asking her to marry me... Damn, I am so lucky things happened the way they did and I didn't do that.

She has never treated me poorly and I believe she truely does love me... Our relationship on most accounts is very good and very loving. But she is two faced... She leads one life which she shares with me and the other she keeps to herself for whatever reason.

I will break up with her but it kills me that it has to hurt her. She deserves love. She deserves someone more suited to she so she doesn't have to hide what she believes in and stands for. I'm honest with myself and with our relationship. To continue on with our relationship would be a failure of my own integrity and ultimately will ruin a future family. I owe it to my kids and family to find the best, not the second best.

Is there a noble way to break up? Is there a painless way? I'm glad I'm the one to do it... This will be the final step in a 2 1/2 year long journey though a time in my life when I could have destroyed myself. I made it and I changed for the better.


So what's the point of this?

To anyone who might think thier situation sucks... That is only emotion. Just like love. There are good things to come from every bad situation and there is no such thing as a mistake. Well, there is one thing... The only mistake that can ever be made is not learning from something. Take control of your life and do something with it. It may be our only chance.

[Edited on 20-10-2004 by tacitblue]

Originally posted by tacitblue
She leads one life which she shares with me and the other she keeps to herself for whatever reason.

I suggest that you talk with her. You believe that she loves you. Before just dumping her, talk with her - you don't know why she has a double life - maybe she is trying to avoid hurting you. Maybe she was abused and doesn't want to burden you with it. I have no idea - but the only way you will ever feel at ease is if you at least talk with her.