posted on Nov, 7 2012 @ 03:04 PM
I have been wondering something? Do you like being called a hypocrite? I found something out about myself; I myself have been one.
I have been writing threads on Above Top Secret for about 3 weeks now and I have used these words in just about all of them. “Take care and much
love to all”.
Now the truth is I don’t mean it. “All” is all. I found that it is difficult for me to love all and truly mean it. I am not as enlightened as
I thought. I am a hypocrite. In spite of what I have been trying to get across to others; I need to look in the mirror, first.
Hatred is something that I try very hard to not have for others; that I find obnoxious or rude, but having love for them is difficult to come by. I
am trapped in my human condition for a reason. I have lessons to learn. This is the hardest lesson for me to learn.
There are (7) “deadly sins” according to Wikipedia, (highly spiritual and non-secular); wrath, greed, sloth, pride, lust, envy, and gluttony.
(1) Wrath (Latin, ira), also known as "rage", may be described as inordinate and uncontrolled feelings of hatred and anger.
(2) Greed (Latin, avaritia), also known as avarice or covetousness, is, like lust and gluttony, a sin of excess. "Avarice" is more of a blanket
term that can describe many other examples of greedy behavior.
(3) Sloth (Latin, socordia) can entail different vices. While sloth is sometimes defined as physical laziness, spiritual laziness is emphasized.
(4) Pride (Latin, superbia), or hubris (Greek), is considered the original and most serious of the seven deadly sins, and the source of the others.
It is identified as a desire to be more important or attractive than others, failing to acknowledge the good work of others, and excessive love of
(5) Lust or lechery (carnal "luxuria") is an intense desire. It is usually thought of as excessive sexual wants, however the word was originally a
general term for desire. Therefore lust could involve the intense desire of money, fame, or power as well.
(6) Envy (Latin, invidia) is characterized by an insatiable desire. Envy is similar to jealousy in that they both feel discontent towards someone’s
traits, status, abilities, or rewards. The difference is the envious also desire that entity and covet it.
(7) Gluttony (Latin, gula) is the over-indulgence and over-consumption of anything to the point of waste; derived from the Latin, gluttire, meaning
to gulp down or swallow and can be interpreted as selfishness.
There may be other sins that can be focused on, but these cover most in some form or another.
My self-evaluation follows in reverse order from the previous aforementioned definitions:
(1) Gluttony - I may sometimes be a glutton for punishment, but I am not one to take more than I need. I swallow my pride, but not as much as I
should. I appreciate what I have, but try not to waste. I have a lack of selfishness. I give myself an “A-”. There is still much room for
(2) Envy - I never covet what others have. I know material possessions mean absolutely nothing. I am never jealous of what others possess because I
am content with what I have. I do not think the “grass is greener on the other side“, ever. I believe if someone is rewarded for their behavior,
good for them. However, you cannot take it with you when you ascend to your next existence. I give myself an “A+”. I nailed envy.
(3) Lust - I have intense desires, so I cannot say I am without lust. I do not lust for money, fame or power, but I do lust for my wife. I don’t
lust for others wives, but I do appreciate beauty in others. I lust for attention. I lust to be heard. I lust to be validated. I will not let what
others think of me, say about me or to me let that change. I crave positive attention. I give myself a “B+”. I need to work on my desire for
(4) Pride - I do have pride. The saying goes “pride comes before a fall”. I learned this lesson recently. I was chastised vehemently for
behavior and I felt it was unfair; my “pride” would not let it go. As a result I was punished, also, unfairly; I did gain something very
important; humility. Whether I deserved to be punished or not, I was forced to deal with the consequences of my actions. Ego is pride. We
sometimes make the mistake of classifying ego as self-esteem. I think of ego as false pride and self-esteem as what I truly feel about myself. This
is where I made my mistake. I give myself a hard fought “B“. I really need to recognize the differences between ego and self-esteem.
(5) Sloth - I am the total opposite of sloth to the nth degree. I am definitely not spiritually lazy. I am always trying to improve myself
spiritually; every minute of my daily life. Why? Because when my soul ascends, I want to be in the “Light” of my higher power. I never know
when my time will come; I always try to be prepared. I give myself a strong “A”. I can always improve on spiritual feelings and actions.
(6) Greed - I am not greedy in the traditional sense; money, clothes, etc. I am greedy for attention. I want attention from my wife, from my
family, from my articles; I want it all. I just prefer it to be positive in nature. I do not mind constructive criticism as long as it is presented
to me in a positive way. Otherwise, it becomes an attack on my ego (remember, I have this problem recognizing the differences between ego and
self-esteem). I still give myself a well-deserved “A-” with room for improvement.
(7) Wrath - Finally, the sins of all sins. The one I have the most trouble with. When it comes to the behavior of others that exhibit; greed,
sloth, pride, lust, envy and gluttony, I admit I have wrath. My anger is well placed though, it generates from this place I call my heart; filled
with love, but tested by the hatred of others. I have found forgiveness in my heart for those that have wronged me many times. I will always try to
love others regardless of who they are or what they have done. Anger keeps me from liking them. With anger I admit comes hatred. This is why I
consider myself to be a hypocrite.
I had anger issues for many years growing up. I hit so many things and got in so many fights with people over the stupidest things. When I was 28 I
realized why. I had been abused as a young boy by someone who stood for things we are taught that were good. He was a cantor in my synagogue, he was
a youth advisor for different Jewish youth groups and he was a police officer. He was the source for my anger. When I began to understand that, my
anger management became easier. Now, I still have anger towards what he did to me and I know to others, but it comes from a different level of
understanding. I will never know why he did this to me, but I have learned to not let the anger control me.
I still have an ego and I hate to be told I am wrong about anything. My self-esteem helps me regulate things pretty well. I have a huge problem with
rude or obnoxious people that I really need to get a grip on. I give myself a “B-”. It is not uncontrollable rage; rather it is lack of
understanding for why these people behave the way they do. I need to do a better job of being more understanding and drop the hatred; I will forgive
I can say take care and much love to all; I don’t have to agree with you or like you, but I can love you all for who you are.