Presexual Agreement Contracts

*bang head on desk*

didn't Einstein make one of these? Or he had a weirdo contract made up with a clause in it stipulating sexual relations as well as meals to be served ect?

I didn't know you could do that!

Well, in my case I would get the couch for suggesting it.....and a scornful smile/ I hate you look.

Originally posted by AccessDenied
First off..this may have been better posted in the relationships forum.
Secondly, I see no problem with how you feel towards children/relationships...but a contract is a bit much.
If you find the right person, I fail to see how a legal document would be needed. It sounds more like you wish to cover your behind on the off chance you found yourself in that situation.
If you really don't want children...permanently deal with it and get a vasectomy. No worries.

I think the purpose of this contract is to avoid finding the wrong person, not finding the right person. If you find the right person, the contract is a non-issue.

Regardless I think it's a bit over the top; if you have decided you never want to have children you can schedule a vasectomy and never have to worry about having children again. If you don't want children currently, your best bet would be to try and move to an area where women are more liberal about getting abortions and using birth control.

You start off saying its because you don't want to pass on your DNA but the last line is about you not wanting to provide support, its her sole responsibility.
Which is it?

ETA
Unless you have had no sex education, then you know full well sex causes pregnancies.
You have two choices:
Abstain from sex or get a vasectomy

reply to post by TKDRL


You can't help it dude.

Its a "read OP > read few post on first page > post reply" world.

We are not robots who predetermine an intimate moment, sex is not just for making children it is also to connect on a deeper level emotionally. And sometimes just for fun, nobody will make me write a contract on intimate life.

What's next an agreement about when and where you will fall in love.

This sounds like something out of a comedy show.
A thing like sex shouldn't be in contracts, that's like the opposite of romantic.

Originally posted by Trustfund
If you don't want the possibility of a child then don't have sex.
Get a vasectomy, they are reversible.

vasectomy is not reversible ! I am against aggressive ways of preventing pregnancy for both men and women, even hormone pills are bad so what is the best way !? do you guys know any better way instead of these ?

reply to post by luciddream


Apparently so......
Oh well, I did my best

Originally posted by Flavian
reply to post by Unity_99

 

Did you not read what i wrote?

There is a world of difference between birth control failing (accident) and deliberate deceit (sabotage of birth control). Accidents are just that and both parties are at fault. However, if deceit is involved then why should one party be made to pay? In those (rare) circumstances, it isn't an accident, it is effectively entrapment.

ETA:

My post is selfish? Your post is entirely disingenuous and doesn't go anywhere near answering what i was asking.

edit on 5-11-2012 by Flavian because: (no reason given)

edit on 5-11-2012 by Flavian because: (no reason given)

What does anything 2 adults do or don't do, and its not illegal to stop taking birth control, have to do with Baby's unique and individual rights that supercede anything two adults do?

NOTHING!

reply to post by maes2


There is NO sure fire 100% effective method of birth control other than abstinence. Even a vasectomy or a tubal ligation is not fool proof as mistakes can be made or sometimes Mother Nature corrects the works of man. The only way to be sure of preventing an unwanted pregnancy is to keep it in your pants.

reply to post by maes2

vasectomy is not reversible ! I am against aggressive ways of preventing pregnancy for both men and women, even hormone pills are bad so what is the best way !? do you guys know any better way instead of these ?

Please educate yourself and stop spreading disinfo.

Vasectomy Reversible Statistics

•A vasectomy reverse results in pregnancy rates of greater than 50 percent
•Sperm returns to the seminal fluid in 75 to 97 percent of patients
•Of men who have a vasectomy, between 6 and 12 percent choose to have it reversed
•Pregnancy can occur as soon as one month after a vasectomy reversible procedure but on average occur by one year


Vasectomy Reversible Risks

A vasectomy reversible, or a vasovasostomy, is a microsurgery and as with all surgeries, there are risks involved. While rare, here are some of the risks that are involved with reversing a vasectomy.

www.vasectomyreversalusa.com...

Looks to me that you are forgetting something in that contract. You need to have something in there that outlines each persons responsibility in prevention of said possible pregnancy. That the woman agrees to use some form of birth control as well as the man agreeing to use some form of protection as well. That way the responsibility for reproduction doesn't fall to just one person. If you really don't want a baby then why would you give away the responsibility of birth control to just the woman? Then if a pregnancy occurs then you are BOTH responsible for said outcome unless it can be proven that either the man didn't use a condom or the woman didn't use her form of birth control, in which case if that could be proven then the responsibility of raising said child would be upon whomever didn't hold up their end of the birth control agreement.

And since this is a pre sexual contract then it would be who of you to discuss how you both felt about abortion and unwanted pregnancies because the risk of having sex is pregnancy among other things.

reply to post by TKDRL


Well if you are going that far, how about doing away with all of the laws and benefits that come along with marriage and children? And bring back child labor and orphanages, where unwanted children were dropped off and abandoned by their parents to be raised in a sterile environment.

Such is unappealing and ultimately the only way for you to avoid children, is to communicate with the woman, who you intend to have a long term relationship with and sterilize both of you as not to have such. That way you do not have to worry about such.

The Law acknowledges the child's right, and that supercedes the right of an adult to be selfish. Which means your presex contract would be unlawful.

But there is a moral issue that I have no problem bringing up. Because this thread is ridiculous on every level.

And the complete lack of maturity and understanding of basics in life is overwhelming in todays world.

Women are not the toys and playthings of men, who would love to be able to abundantly abuse their rights in this world and walk over all others, use and abuse, toss out, and basically act like lemons.

In reality Creator, God, the Essence of Force of Life and Nature, whatever you wish to call this, tends to make real, life, responsibility, and tends to not let anyone off the hook.

women, often single mothers, already, with or without substandard support, usually from poor working men, say 300 a month, that if on assistance is taken off, are already sacrificing their entire lives to raise children in a world that doesnt even value the most important job in nature to be valid, and trying to do the inhuman inpossibility, and support them on nothing, for wages, since men earn more, if they can be superwoman and work with exuberant energy, but most can only do one job well, and the kids win.

But men cry about their small efforts to support a child they fathered?

And if someone could maniuplate them, they wish to take away all rights to support from all children.

No, you know what, live with intergrity. Choose wisely. They always tell women to do that and blame women for the exteme poverty they're facing and a life of sacrifice. But you guys thinks The world is an osyster and you get all the pearls.

Sorry buddy, some things you have to face eh. Life Deals Reality Checks for everyone.

Originally posted by TKDRL
reply to post by ollncasino

 

From a legal standpoint, that is only true if the woman decides to keep the baby. If she decides against it, then suddenly then suddenly it's not a child, it has no rights. Just a lump of flesh to be taken out and flushed away.

Also yeah, I use rubbers, they can fail once in a while though supposedly. Never had one bust in my 30 years, so I am thinking it is a myth, or some people just do not know what they are doing

edit on Mon, 05 Nov 2012 06:01:10 -0600 by TKDRL because: (no reason given)

Or youre not as well endowed as some............OR you havent been having as much fun as some of us have had......lol those things WILL bust, especially if things are getting...........robust..........

Look......if youre going to have sex, be prepared for accidents..........if youre not........then you dont need to be doing it.....

Dont be a deadbeat

Originally posted by TKDRL
Ok, one of the most important aspect in a relationship, and also one that seems to be the least discussed until too late, is children. Personally, it's one of the first topics I bring up when I am considering a relationship. I consider this world too corrupt to consider passing along my DNA and bloodline in. That is how I feel.

I think that before entering into a sexual relationship, it should be discussed, and a legal agreement drawn up and signed beforehand. If you do not agree on such an important topic, then you really shouldn't be having sex in the first place, and a relationship is probably not a good idea. It would save people a lot of heartache and bitterness.

An example of what such a contract could look like:

I [names here] affirm that we are entering into a serious relationship, and are planning on having sexual relations. We both agree at this time, that we do not wish to have children. Should we both agree that we decide to have children at a later time, a new contract can be drawn up, nullifying this one.

If [woman] decides upon finding out a pregnancy has occured, to keep the child, then she accepts full responsibility for said child.

It needs to be short, to the point, and written in plain english, not legalese mumbojumbo.

Good idea?

edit on Mon, 05 Nov 2012 05:20:02 -0600 by TKDRL because: bad html fixed

I see your point but that that would require people to use forethought, think about the consequences of their actions, and exercise a little personal responsability. Those concepts seem an anthema in today's society.

reply to post by violet


Hypothetically, both. I do not want my DNA passed on, but obviously can't force someone to have an abortion right?

I really wish people would stop telling me to keep it in my pants, or have a vasectomy

I have already stated numerous times I am keeping it in my pants, even if these contractual agreements were in full effect, and perfect, I still would not be having sex now. I choose to be single and abstinent at this time for a lot of reasons, not wanting to pass on my DNA is only one of the many reasons.

I just had an idea, that I thought would solve many problems that waste a whole lot of time and money being battled out in the court system.

Now that I think about it, another thing that should be discussed and decided beforehand, what happens in the event of a divorce or seperation.

reply to post by MaMaa


The example is missing a whole lot. It was just an example for formatting. There are many things I discuss before starting a relationship or having sex. A lot of people don't though, the contract was just an idea that I thought might make people discuss and think a bit more deeply about it.

Devaluing something as pleasurable and natural as sexual relations between consenting adults by forcing them to make a contract is a stark outlook on the future of human relations. How long until the "fineprint" screws one party? Sure, we could pull out our phones, look it up on google, send our messages to each other, then sign some contract saying this is what we agree to, and THEN it's okay....... I'm sorry but I would not wish to be beleagured and bound by some contract; I would rather be bound by my word. What ever happened to a one on one discussion with someone, face to face, real interaction?