Presexual Agreement Contracts

reply to post by Renegade2283


A lot of people really do double up thinking two is better than one, or use oil based lubricant...... Not good at all

reply to post by TKDRL


There should definitely be an STD clause in your contract. You have addressed unplanned pregnancy, but other unplanned conditions can occur when participating in a sexual relationship that should be addressed as well.

However, I think if you presented your presexual contract to a woman to sign your chances of her having relations with you would probably drop to zero to none!

reply to post by Renegade2283


There are guys with good sense of ethics too..

Originally posted by TKDRL
reply to post by Renegade2283

 

I loved her. I am not sure I even believe in the whole one true love thing. I loved all my girlfriends. The first one, we might still be together, but it was out of our control. Her father got a new job across the country, she had to move.

I'm not too sure either, but I am willing to take the risk. I do realize it is a big sacrifice, but I feel it is one I am willing to make. Ill just say it is rough.

ETA: I feel if you really loved this girl you should do everything in your power to be with her. It would be kinda like Romeo and Juliet.

reply to post by littled16


Care to elaborate on what you mean by STD clause?

If a woman didn't want to sleep with me for it, then so be it. Probably wouldn't make a good match for me in a relationship anyways, right?

reply to post by dollukka


Ya, I do see where you are coming from though. It is a rarity in this day and age. Heck, it has always been rare.

Second

reply to post by Renegade2283


We were 12 back then, it was 18 years ago. She is happily married with a kid now. Every long term relationship I have had, I always felt like they were the one at the time. I learned a lot from each and every one. Each one it was many months into the relationship before we had sex. I have a whole lot of great memories with them, I don't think I would trade those in, if it meant I could avoid a bit of heartache I felt when it was over.

Originally posted by TKDRL
reply to post by Renegade2283

 

We were 12 back then, it was 18 years ago. She is happily married with a kid now. Every long term relationship I have had, I always felt like they were the one at the time. I learned a lot from each and every one. Each one it was many months into the relationship before we had sex. I have a whole lot of great memories with them, I don't think I would trade those in, if it meant I could avoid a bit of heartache I felt when it was over.

30 yeas old and you talk with a mindset of a fifteen year old. She broke up or you left her and others. Who cares. Life goes on and you enter sexual relationships with people or you just abstain from it.

Isn´t it time for you, having reached 30 marks on the tree of life to finally grow up and face life as what it is instead of whining about sexual contracts and such? Or do you wish to remain a mamas boy the remainder of your life?

reply to post by johncarter


You don't know me..... How many "mama's boys" you know that own a house outright without a lien, own 50% of a business with over 100k in liquid assets?

How about refraining with the namecalling, and working on your reading comprehension? I have stated a few times in this thread, it is not about me, I choose to be single and celibate at this time(means abstaining in case you don't know). I am throwing out an idea to improve what I see as an important social situation.

You seem to be in the state of mind that it is "grown up" to just go around screwing, and dealing with the consequences later if they come up. I disagree.

reply to post by TKDRL


I see, it seems that 12 is a bit young to be making sexual decisions don't you think? Sounds like you are going with the whole "It is better to have loved and lost then to have never loved at all" idea. We'll as Tommy Lee Jones once said "Really? you should try it some time."

Anyways, I feel that statement only applies to your "one true love". Which if you don't believe in it then there is no point to really make that argument. Anyways, my situation is a little different since I have never been with anyone before, so I couldn't really speak for you.

As for the other posters, they just cant seem to have a calm conversation with you without directly insulting you, kinda sad. I thought we all agreed to "deny ignorance"? Heck, I disagree with most of your statements and you don't see me calling you names.

reply to post by TKDRL


Nice thought but not for me.

If you are after a sexual relationship but don't want kids, can i suggest birth control instead? The only real discussion needed is when one person in the relationship no longer wants birth control - at that stage it has moved beyond a sexual relationship to one where the future lives become important. That is a proper relationship rather than a sexual relationship (if you get the distinction?) - poorly explained rather than a swipe at you!

reply to post by TKDRL


Agree.

Current law gives 100% rights to female, men are just sperm donors and wallets if the female chose to goes through with the pregnancy.

Then again, if i want to have a child, i would not try to do that with a stranger...i would do whatever to prevent that but know the preventions are not 100%.

But i think this contract would mean the relationship would not go too far(and probably won't be someone you will spend you rest of the life with), its like a pre-nup agreement... "just in case we get divorced..." there is already a doubt.

reply to post by Renegade2283


I don't know if I can say 12 is too young, maybe. I am glad we had really good sex ed in our school, that much is for sure. A bit late to change it now I guess. She had been my best friend for a few years, then my girlfriend for two years at the time. It is kind of hard to think back and pass judgement really, as I know a hell of a lot more now than I did then.

reply to post by Flavian


I get what you mean totally. Personally I prefer to be in a real relationship first, the sex comes later if the actual relationship part works out. That is just me though. It seems when you get into the sex part, before knowing enough about how you are compatible other ways, things go sour and end bitterly most of the time. I am sure there are exceptions to that, some people get lucky.

reply to post by luciddream


Hmmm, you mean like a self fulfilling prophecy type deal?

I used to think the idea of prenups was absurd as well, before I had any real assets. Now I am not so sure. I have seen many men get taken for a ride, it makes one wary. The whole idea of alimoney is archaic and outdated. Made perfect sense back when women could not get a job, that is not the case in these here modern times.

reply to post by TKDRL


I do understand the point you are making with this thread. Personally i have had several relationships where i have simply been "seeing" (in the local vernacular) the lady. Round here, that means sexual relationship rather than walks in the park holding hands and the like. It has been clear from the start that is all that is on offer. Only once have i been in a situation where it developed to wanting more (her rather than me, to my shame!). That one did end badly too, lost a very good and very long standing friendship.

I just know that for me, when the other person starts "forgetting" the birth control pills (or saying you don't need to bag it up), the alarm bells start well and truly ringing before quickly turning into klaxons!

Obviously though, these things are all a distant memory to me these days. The missus would have my gonads for ear muffs if it was anything but!

I've read through this thread, and I'll tell you one thing. If you DO have a "baby contract" with a woman you have sex with, I can nearly guarantee that it would be thrown out by any judge who you are standing in front of when your former sexual playmate is suing your ass for child support.

Why? Because that "contract" included wording that affected a third-party (your baby) without that third party's consent. Yes, I know that children cannot consent to contracts, but that goes doubly-so when you are talking about a baby that may or may not be conceived.

Really, if a woman gets pregnant by you, you are responsible for that child. That is what it is. You ultimately only have two options available to you if you truly want to avoid children:

1) Don't have sex (or don't have sex with women).
2) Get a vasectomy.

If you choose to ignore both of those options, then you are willfully putting yourself in a position in which you may end up having to support a child you never wanted.

reply to post by TKDRL

I think such contracts are already invented ! even in Islamic teachings especially (Shia law) there is a law called temporary marriage. but in that contracts father is always responsible of the child economically. and the child can inherit from father however in temporary marriage child's mother can not inherit from the father and after the marriage father has no responsibility towards the mother and it is only responsible of the child. (of course if that marriage leads to any child)
when such marriages end the woman should not involve in any sex (another marriage) for a special period(some months), to ensure that if she is pregnant or not.

I say skip the contracts and come up with a fake name. Never give people your real name. That is basic "hook-up 101".

That being said, man up. If you find that your partner is pregnant, do your utmost to make a combined and informed decision. Yes, you cannot say "keep the child" or "get rid of the child". Those are never going to be your choices to make. You can argue your side and beliefs. You roll the dice my friend. Sometimes you roll seven and sometimes you roll boxcars (actually I guess in this instance you rolled a seven and still lose). Pregnancy doesn't have to be a curse or a blessing. It simply is the result of a biological function. How we as individuals deal with it is up to us.

I was probablty kidding about the fake name BTW LoL

reply to post by Flavian


Yeah, There was a few years of my life where I was into just seeing women as well. It was all very clear, luckily never had anything go sour like that. We were both too busy for relationships, and just wanted some good old fashioned sex.

I have always been careful myself, when I was younger because I knew I couldn't afford to raise a kid, now it is for very different, but just as valid reasons.