I felt the helplessness of the father in your poem. A woman has the bonding experience of carrying the baby in her womb, and a man doesn't have that
physical experience.I felt the father's desperation to finally meet his baby boy, nurture and teach him as he grows. And yeah, this made me tear up,
Originally posted by imawlinn
Thank you everyone for your kind words. I wrote this six years ago as part of my healing process. I'm glad it's being received well. I tear up
every time I read it. Takes me back to that night..
I teared up trying to put myself in your shoes while thinking of my own two grown children.
A sad story and well told, only thing is, it seems like a junior high school student wrote it...sorry but as poetry and word smithing goes the writing
could use a bit more expanded vocabulary in my opinion, and the rhyming scheme is amateurish at best. Almost as though it came straight out of a bad
greeting card. Just my two cents....and completely constructive criticism to be sure. SnF and good luck!
The Above Top Secret Web site is a wholly owned social content community of The Above Network, LLC.
This content community relies on user-generated content from our member contributors. The opinions of our members are not those of site ownership who maintains strict editorial agnosticism and simply provides a collaborative venue for free expression.
All content copyright 2013, The Above Network, LLC.