How Did You Meet Your Significant Other?

Ive given up all hope. Seems that im unbelievably unattractive and no one would ever want me.

Attractiveness is a mixture of several things, the LEAST of which is personal appearance.

I've known guys who were drop dead gorgeous, but so obnoxious that they literally turned my stomach. I've known average looking guys with a fabulously awesome personality that transformed them into something incredible.

Humor, kindness, courage, tenderness, intelligence.....these are the things that make a person attractive.

Is that you in your avatar? Because I see a handsome man with a lovely smile.

I was working in an ER.. some really cute Marine came in with a crushed ankle.. a few titanium pins later we had our first date. He sorta stalked me and I gave in. That was about 20 yrs ago. 3 kids and 2 dogs, various critters and a haunted house. Life is blissful.

I doubt I could handle an internet dating thing. When the husband and I got serious.. I told him EXACTLY what I wanted and expected.. and what Id give. If he had any reservations to not waste my time basically. He did the same with me. We agreed. Unfortunately I think that most folks would freak out if you slapped them with that sort of thing. Brutal honesty isnt always accepted very well.

My first husband and I met by pure chance when I was walking down the street one afternoon on my way to the dentist office, I should have taken that as an omen...heehee! We were both young and dumb and were married 6 months later. We had three daughters together and were married for eighteen miserable years...a whole other story.
I met my second husband at work. We started dating a couple of months after we met and haven't been apart since. That's been 15 years ago, he is my absolute BEST friend in the world! We're perfect for each other, he does his thing, I do my thing and we do our things together. We have a fun just going on walks holding hands or hanging out reading the paper. It doesn't matter, it's each others company that we like...he's my friend

Originally posted by smyleegrl

Ive given up all hope. Seems that im unbelievably unattractive and no one would ever want me.

Attractiveness is a mixture of several things, the LEAST of which is personal appearance.

I've known guys who were drop dead gorgeous, but so obnoxious that they literally turned my stomach. I've known average looking guys with a fabulously awesome personality that transformed them into something incredible.

Humor, kindness, courage, tenderness, intelligence.....these are the things that make a person attractive.

Is that you in your avatar? Because I see a handsome man with a lovely smile.

Oh, I completely agree! I've been out with some guys that people would consider to be utter losers, just by appearance, and they were some of the nicest, funniest and most caring guys I've ever met.

My OH laughs at some of my exs, because they look dweeby or whatever. I haven't the heart to tell him he looks dweeby too

A coworker from India made an interesting point about dating sites the other day. He said that families will pick a spouse for you. And they dig, and find out all the information possible and weigh it to find the best spouse. And the majority of them are successful.

He said that dating sites are just a modern version of your family selecting a suitable match.

reply to post by Advantage


That is so sweet!

I didn't meet mine on dating site, but my mom did!

I was actually married, and pregnant. I walked into a mutual friends house and everyone was sleeping everywhere because they had a party the night before. I shook this guy on the couch and told him to sit up so I could sit down.
After I left, he told the other guys, if he ever had a chance to be with me, he would marry me.

When I finally got the courage to leave my ex 2 years later, he found out about it. I wouldn't marry him for 8 years, even though he asked the first year.

Been the best 17 years of my life!!!!

reply to post by smyleegrl


No social media for me i'm afraid. Met at work (she was on a temp contract) and kept in touch after. Things grew from there.

I will post the link (tomorrow as going very soon) if i can find it, but there was some recent research into this and in the UK it seems like it is around 30% of new relationships these days from social media. Not sure how this plays out globally though.

reply to post by Hefficide


HAHAH Heff. You so silly!

Sounds like one hot lady you have there

reply to post by smyleegrl


Well Smylee...this is the "Honest to God's Truth"! The first time that I had a look at my wife was the day that her folks brought her home wrapped in swaddling clothes. I was 10 years old at the time. She grew up two doors down from me and for the longest time was my sister's brat best friend. She and my sister were inseperable for quite a long time, so she was a fixture at our house. I was married to another woman and we had two beautiful daughters. That relationship ended in divorce and I ended up moving to Florida where I spent the next 18 years. She was married after I had left for the south and had four great kids by her first husband. During those 18 years we saw each other on occasion when I would return to Ohio for visits. I did have a serious relationship for about 13 years while in Florida that ended up nowhere...During a visit to see my Mom my wife happened to stop by and we talked for a long time that night. While I was out of the room for a few minutes my mother, knowing that my future wife's marriage was on the rocks, offered her my body (I kid you not!) if she could get me out of my funk...Well, about 6 months went by and she contacted me by email. We started corresponding, then talking on the phone...then we met for a weekend at a spot in the middle. Ends up that she left her relationship, I moved back to Ohio, and we started a serious relationship that culminated with us getting married. We've been married going on 9 years now...While all has not been a bed of roses, our marriage has worked...and to think that I have known this woman for 48 years now, and never would have guessed in my wildest dreams...

reply to post by smyleegrl


OH, My,,, How do I explain this?
OK, imagine a 5' 4" 105 pound young Chinese Woman.
I'm assigned to follow this American who's 6' 200 pounds, large build, big mustache and brown hair with a touch of gray and a Great Smile.
After four and a half months of following, doing me job,,, I was fantasizing about the big American just grabbing me and kissing me,,, Oh,,,, I still Blush to this day about those thoughts.
I was divorced and had a daughter, I knew he was divorced from a 15 year marriage and had three sons and a daughter.
But he was American and I was not to be noticed
OK, one early morning when he out jogging, I lose him,,,,, OMG, I race to find him and BAAMM,, I Bounce off his chest, I look up and there he is, looking at me with that Big Smile and Those Laughing Brown Eyes and those Big Hands Reaching for Me,,,,,,, I thought I'd Piss My Self and Die!

Listen he said, We've played this game long enough, Your Beautiful and I'd like to take you to Breakfast and Dinner if you can stand to be with me.
I about Melted and I took his big hand and I was lifted into his arms, I wanted him to kiss me, but I think I was Blushing so badly he stopped and sat me on my feet.
Of-course I had to resign my position and I went to work in my secondary field as a Doctor at Harbin Medical University, Hospital #4.
We've been together every sense that day and my husband had to ask my father if he could date me, REALLY! After two years, my future husband again asked my father if he could marry me
Has it been a bed of Roses? No,,, Life was not easy moving to America and your Culture is So Very Different.

I wanted to add the music or I should say the song played at our wedding, requested by my husband, He always calls me his little Butterfly. I still don't understand that! I guess it's better than being his Little Grass Hopper! LOL's

It was weird.
I got off work and decided to go to an all night diner.
Had some coffee and started reading a paperback.
I was the only person there, sitting at a long empty counter.
He walks in, looks around decides to sit between me and the wall.
I was so pissed, how dare someone sit that close to me.
I shrugged and didn't look at him.
I got real curious and sneaked a peak.
Holy hell he was soooo hot.
He had asked for coffee, the waitress brought it but didn't bring the creamer cup.
So the first words I ever said to him were " Do you need some cream?"
We talked awhile. Didn't exchange numbers, nothing except see ya.
7 days later he pops up behind me in line at a sandwich shop down the street.
I say hey you gonna be at the diner later, I'll meet you there. he said sure.
That was our first date. I found out later my older sisters had crushes on him in high school.
We also realized that even though we grew up in the same town, 6 1/2 yrs apart, our paths crossed a number of times. When my mom took us out shopping, he said I saw you in the pack of kids following your mom.
We owned an ice cream shop, I was 10 and my older sister was 16, she got all nervous when she saw him pull up. He ordered a banana split, she forgot the banana. He said I saw you peeking around the corner in the shop.
This was all before we ever had the internet. It's been an interesting 17 yrs. We have 2 great kids - 7 yr old and 17 month old. Yes I know we waited a long time to have kids, he goofs around saying he'll be in his 60s when our daughter graduates.

Interesting thread

Mine is slightly odd sounding, but hey we've been together for 8 years now....

I was in hospital many years ago and an elderly lady was making bead bracelets on a loom. I asked her if she'd make one for each of my daughters, to which she replied, "Go buy a loom, i'll teach you and you can make them yourself". So i did.

Fast forward a few years and i wanted to make some more for them, so i joined a craft forum to seek out new patterns, and there on the forum was a lady who thought i was some kind of imposter, maybe a journalist undercover looking into the private lines of crafters lol. Very untrusting she was.

Got chatting anyway, and over the months we hit it off. Turns out she had made clay fairies for years and i was making wooden fairy doors kids.

A match made in fantasy heaven

CX.