Hi I'm Bi-polar, do you have any questions?

reply to post by sTrE3tFigHt3r


Here in the UK your General Practicioner cannot diagnose Bi-polar, they refer you to a mental health outpatcient unit. At this unit you will under go mutiple sessions with psychiatrist doctors. After the mutiple sessions they will then make a diagnosis. They actually misdiagnosed me for months as just suffering from acute depression until they finally got it right. Apparently Bi-polar is notoriously difficult to diagnose and it didn't help that I always seemed to be on a low when my appointments came around.

Originally posted by jheherrin

Originally posted by michael1983l
reply to post by jheherrin

 

Yes I do currently take anti-depressants along with an anti psychotic (Citalopram and Olanzapine), but I am pretty sure this is a permanent condition. I have Bi-polar type 1 with rapid cycling.

That saddens me. While I believe in the genetic link for manic depression, I have discovered that a healthy lifestyle can negate the need for anti-depressants, and that one can, thru lots of work mentally and physically, reach a point of being fairly balanced mentally.

Bipolar I is what I have as well. This is the most severe form of the illness. Please do not think that diet and exercise are going to fix this. It saddens me that people keep suggesting we should avoid the medication. When bipolars go off their medications they end up back in the hospital or morgue. Do you really want someone with psychosis off their medicine?

Thank you for the thread, Michael. I am glad you are doing alright and sharing your insights.

It is a helluva roller-coaster ride. I will enjoy reading it.

Originally posted by michael1983l
reply to post by Darkblade71

 

That is very good advice and it is certainly the path I want to take. Something I haven't mentioned about my illness so far is the servere lack of motivation in the lows and the racing ideas in the highs. I often find myself starting unrealistc or overly optomistic projects or interests only for the motivation to do this completely extinguish when I come down from my high. I have a lot of great ideas but never really the metal to see them through, it is so frustrating.

Yes, this is a big problem and the way I have dealt with it is through establishing routines. When I tell myself that it is time to do X, and I do X every week/day/etc, around the same time, then it seems to sidestep the lack of motivation because I don't have to have that conversation with myself about whether to do it or not. It also helps with the over-ambitious projects, because you don't just rush off to start the thing when you first have to make a time in your regular schedule for it.

So now, I have a very ordinary life. It has really saved me on some of the bad days when I could barely get out of bed. It's good to find tricks that work for you - like having the right tools in the toolbox.

reply to post by JamesGC


School was a hard time for me, I vastly underacheived and had great social problems partly due to my moods. I would often skip school and could never settle down to do any homework given. I joined the military soon after school and it gave my life structure and almost forced me to get myself into gear. However I suffered gratly from social issues with forming working and friendship relationships. I have been in steady employment for all of my life but I think I function because I find my job so easy. I struggle to concerntrate and motivate but think I get by almost on auto pilot and can't help but think of what I could acheive had I not been suffering from these symptoms. Getting the go in my to actually get to work is sometimes very difficult, especially when I am in my lows because my body feels so tired unless I get like 14 hours of sleep at a time.

An interesting thread you have provided here and thank you for being so open with answering questions.

I have a father who was diagnosed with bi-polar disorder and I am pretty familiar with the disorder as I have lived through his up and down battle with it for my entire life. As many are aware, the volatile moods of bi-polar not only take such a great deal out of those who suffer from it but from family members and friends around the person. I've witnessed many turbulent situations, dark times, as well as hope and perseverance. The times of rock bottom were visiting him in hospitals after suicide attempts and being in the midst of rages and psychotic episodes.

I am happy to say as of now he is doing rather well. My parents are split up as of now, although ,the split was amicable and they are on good terms. He lives alone and he is doing better than I remember in quite some time which is probably do to a mixture of the right medication (not over medicated anymore) and the lack of other strong and negative moods to feed into him, which happened when my family was all together. I visit him often and we speak on the phone a few times a week just talking about anything. I am proud of him and feel a great deal of relief. I think it is important to know that bi-polar as an illness DOES NOT define the individual, my father is a good man who has taught me important moral lessons in life. I think sometimes people forget the person underneath when dealing with such a draining illness.

My question for you is, how has bi-polar affected your relationships whether it be with family and or friends? Also are rages and fits of anger a staple of bi-polar or not necessarily part of the illness for everyone? (My father has also been told he has Border-line personality disorder)

I also want to reiterate the importance of healing the mind and spirit through natural means as being such an INTEGRAL part of dealing with any illness both mental and physical. Dietary changes, herbs, meditation, etc can make an enormous difference in my opinion. It is YOUR mind, your spirit, and your body. You hold the greatest healing power that no pill or psychiatrist can give. I want to wish you well in your on going fight to grasp the reins on this illness.

Sorry for the long post and if any of the questions I presented had been asked already, I am slow in typing these replies.

Originally posted by FeelingPure
Have you ever taken adderall pills to help with focus?

Being manic is like you are on adderall out of control.

When I have been wild with mania I have seen light make my pupils dilate to saucers. My brother-in-law (Dr.) told me that was the adrenaline rush of mania. I lost 25 pounds in one day after the birth of my son. In 2010 I lost 45 pounds in a few weeks.

I would not ever recommend adderall as a fix.

OP,

I want to thank you for creating this thread.

I was diagnosed with Bi-Polar disease this year, and have had a hard time accepting the cold hard reality of the disease.

Through this question and answer thread, I have found a lot of useful information.

Those with this disease often go untreated, and lead a confusing life of ups and downs. When I was down, I just contributed it to my depression, which I have been treated for since 1997.

And when I am up, I just attributed to me feeling better.

But the ups and downs ARE the disease. Not just a depressed mood or feeling better mood.

In the minimalist of terms, this disease sucks.

Do you depersonlize, in the times of "high"?

Originally posted by sad_eyed_lady

Originally posted by jheherrin

Originally posted by michael1983l
reply to post by jheherrin

 

Yes I do currently take anti-depressants along with an anti psychotic (Citalopram and Olanzapine), but I am pretty sure this is a permanent condition. I have Bi-polar type 1 with rapid cycling.

That saddens me. While I believe in the genetic link for manic depression, I have discovered that a healthy lifestyle can negate the need for anti-depressants, and that one can, thru lots of work mentally and physically, reach a point of being fairly balanced mentally.

Bipolar I is what I have as well. This is the most severe form of the illness. Please do not think that diet and exercise are going to fix this. It saddens me that people keep suggesting we should avoid the medication. When bipolars go off their medications they end up back in the hospital or morgue. Do you really want someone with psychosis off their medicine?

Thank you for the thread, Michael. I am glad you are doing alright and sharing your insights.

It is a helluva roller-coaster ride. I will enjoy reading it.

We all need to do what works for us. Please don't imagine that I think anyone who does well on the meds should just stop taking them. If they are working well for you, that is great.

For me, I never reached "normal" on the medications they tried for me, and I hated the way they made me feel. Had I had success on my meds, I would have stayed on them. after enough years of tinkering with my meds and never finding the right combination, I was sick of doctors and sick of not feeling like myself.

It sounds like you think those of us who are handling our bi-polar through diet and exercise and it is working for us do not understand or aren't really bi-polar. My grandma was severely manic-depressive and we always say that on my Dad's side we have colon cancer and on my Mom's side we have crazy. I was initially diagnosed with cyclothymia around age 20, then later that diagnosis was changed to classic bi-polar. I went through years of doctors and various meds. I hated the meds, and I am happy that I can control my symptoms without them.

What works for one person may not work for someone else. We are all different, and I think we learn coping mechanisms over time, as well.

Originally posted by TwoSpirit


My question for you is, how has bi-polar affected your relationships whether it be with family and or friends? Also are rages and fits of anger a staple of bi-polar or not necessarily part of the illness for everyone? (My father has also been told he has Border-line personality disorder)

Thanks for the reply. In answer to your questions, when not treated with medication my mood swings and fits of rage are toxic to my family life where by had I not had such a patcient wife we would already be divorced. It also affects all close family and friends. It makes it very hard to obtain and maintain friendships and I find that most of my friends now have been friends since before I suffered from the symptoms as a kid and I have picked up very few good friends since.

Without mewdication my fits of rage can be quite scarry and it is something I wish to avoid.

reply to post by phantomjack


Thanks, I hope you find a way to keep everything under control soon.

Originally posted by paranoidfreak
Do you depersonlize, in the times of "high"?

That is a very acurate way of describing it so yes.It is like an out of body experience almost.

Originally posted by paranoidfreak
Do you depersonlize, in the times of "high"?

I over-empathize and indulge in magic thinking. I used to act out and put myself in risky situations like letting strangers take me home from parties or running outside in the snow, barefoot and in my lingerie, but I don't do that any more. Now I get overproductive and find myself needing very little sleep. At first, I feel great and like "this is how everybody should feel all the time". Then it ramps up and I get racing thoughts and start to feel very fragmented and like things are breaking up in jagged edges - I call this feeling "peaky". It is hardest to function during that stage.

Originally posted by Dr Expired

Originally posted by michael1983l

Originally posted by spinalremain
Do you feel medication is necessary?

What I mean is, I realize it has benefits, but do you feel the benefits outweigh the drawbacks? How do you feel about not altering your brain chemistry and just being you?
Thx

 

Posted Via ATS Mobile: m.abovetopsecret.com

 

I am currently on medication because I think my illness is intensified by stress and other pressures and I am under a lot of them right now. I did live a long time without medication and I was fine although I have a susceptability to moodiness and ill formed decision making when I am in the peaks of my cycles.

At the moment the medication is helping no end but it also has lots of side effects like tiredness, weight gain and an overall dulling of personality.

Exercise then meditation then exercise then meditation or Tai Chi which combines both into one could help.
Sometimes you have to make changes not just cope sometimes just coping is what brings about stress and its manifestations
Anywway good luck but you could do worse than meditating and exercising

Dr Expired. Do you have any statistics or experiance where Chakra meditation/relaxation thru sound have helped people who are bipolar? I googled a bit but could not find anything I thought was useful and direct specific information as always when dealing with information on Chakra.

If you can manage without the meds, more power to you. There are various degrees of severity of the illness. I hear of so many people having Bipolar 2 and some even have Bipolar 3, a very mild form of the illness.

I stopped counting the number of my hospitalizations after I got to 20th. My illness started in 1977 and I was misdiagnosed as schizophrenic, OCD and uni-polar before they realized what I had in 1984.

It happens that sometimes when Bipolars feel good they toss the medicine and end up back in the dumpster.

Finding the right combination of medicine is a challenge. When you go from mania to depression you need to get you medicine adjusted.

Bipolar One has been hell for me, my ex-husband and my two now grown sons. I rarely look back at my memories as they either disappeared or are too depressing. I did not ever have ECT, but I can't remember #.

Great thread, Michael. If I can make it, surely you can, too.

Star and Flag.

reply to post by sad_eyed_lady

It sounds like I am on a less severe end of the spectrum than you are - I've never been hospitalized, although my Grandma was, many times. I can understand your reaction now, and I am glad you shared that information. I guess that goes to show, like the Aspergers-to-Autism spectrum, we all fall in different places along the bi-polar line. Thanks sad_eyed_lady!

Originally posted by michael1983l
reply to post by JamesGC

 

I have self medicated in the form of illigal substances but in the long run that only makes things worse and is a short term fix. I am very reliant on medication currently but I am looking for a way to naturally deal with the illness.

I lived with a person for over 30 years who was bipolar. Let me tell you before we recognized what it was my life was a living hell.
Telling someone to manage it without medication is sentencing everyone they live with to a life barely worth living. The last thing a bipolar needs is rejection from those around him/her but for ones own sanity, if a bipolar person tries to go it "natural" and refuses medication, then the people living with them have no hope of a decent life and for their own mental well being should leave the situation.

We "managed" it with melatonin for the highs and calling in with the "flu", etc for the worst of the depression. No one ever knew, except us. The bipolar person truly tried quite hard to manage thoughts and mood swings naturally and without medication.

In the meantime, the kids lived through a hell of having 2 parents in one, one raging maniac and one super mellow parent, and never knew who they would be getting on a particular day. Talk about screwing with your life.

When the time came to get real help the kids were grown and had lived through a nightmare of a home life. At least now my life is stable because of the medication.

It took a long time to "give in" but I wish we had done it as soon as we realized what was going on. I lost many good years with my bipolar spouse because of lack of medication so we could have a real life together.

Please don't put down medication. Unless a bipolar person is a hermit, think of the people who love them and live with them. They deserve a decent life, one free of screaming rages, and constant crying on the couch.

Is it true you can understood the secrets to the universe one day and find the next you are wondering if the jam goes on top of the peanut butter or under it?

Yes, I know it's part of a joke but are the swings that wild as some say?

I was diagnosed as type 2 Bipolar last year, I was medicated for 2 weeks until I decided that I would prefer to find a natural alternative, and since then I have not used any type of medication. My life is better than ever before.

If you are doing something you love, and are happy with your life, you will not only survive but you will have the opportunity to far exceed your expectations of success.

Start painting a masterpiece, compose some music, don't fight who you are. You are not designed to live a mundane repetitive existence. You're here to brighten up the night.

You're a firework.

Someone earlier asked what it is like for the family of an unmedicated bi-polar.

Well, the highs start with rising early and full of energy for the person with bi-polar. They become quite sociable and get lots of stuff done. At the beginning of the manic cycle, I'd wake up to a clean garage or pantry, thank the person, only to be screamed at "now keep it that way." As the manic cycle increased productivity at work increased and proposals made for grand projects. The bi-polar would become endeared by the boss, especially as work went from early AM to late PM with a cheerful attitude at work. At home, life became hell. The screaming and rages would begin. One never knew what would set a rage off, it could be as simple as saying "oh your home late" when arriving home at 9 or 10 PM, and then the response might be a screaming tirade on how hard they work and how they are underappreciated and how you and the kids are just leeches. The kids became upset, because the manic would want to play but become enraged at the slightest childish thing the kids did. When confronted, the bipolar would say, I don't know what you are talking about I'm in a great mood, its you guys screwing everything up.
Work got the cheerful and upbeat manic side, home got the manic beast because they can't unload on the boss or co-workers. The non-manic spouse gets called lazy for going to bed so early and getting up so late, when in reality it is the manic who is going to bed at midnight and getting up at 3AM. And the manic screams and rages, then forgets how much the spouse is hurt and doesn't even realize they were screaming and raging (they don't even see it in themselves) and demands sex and pouts that they aren't loved and how the partner isn't sexually up to it anymore.

Then come the even times, the normal times, I'd pray for those times and yet be on edge because I never knew what was coming next. The bipolar doesn't go up then down then up. The bipolar can go up, come to normal, and go back up or vice versa. There isn't a true pattern to predict what was next. The stress was enormous waiting to see who I'd be married to the next day.

Then the depressive times, At the beginning and end of the depressive times, my bipolar was sweet, easy to get along with at home, the kids and I loved being around. It was the beginning and end of the depressive times that made it worth staying together. I guess I was kinda in the classic cycle of "violence" even though there was just emotional violence rather than physical.
Work couldn't really tell a difference, but the beginning/ending depressive would go to work at regular times, come home at regular times and sleep at regular times. The boss would say guess you are just worn out from all your hard work. Then would come the sobbing, crying, pleading baby stage. My depressive would actually get physically ill and call in sick, with all the productivity during the high times, there would just be sympathy and hope you are well soon from the boss. Life would be couch, tv, life isn't worth living, no getting dressed, and constant pleading for forgiveness for the rages in the manic phase. The worst would be having to carry out the grand plans made during the manic phase when the depressive could barely move.
How no one at work ever caught on is beyond me. The bosses always loved him.

Finally at retirement there was an acceptance of the need for medication and now we are living a normal life. There are complaints about how the medication makes the bipolar feel, but I feel I deserve a normal and placid life after putting up with all I did for all those years, and making excuses for the bipolar and helping the bipolar hide it from work. Our marriage is now fantastic and I'm glad I stuck with it. The kids turned out ok.