My problem solving story

Hi,

I writing this from a tablet, so excuse me for any faults.

I have recently made a thread about me being a targeted individual. The thread got removed for various reasons.

To sum it all up, I'm basicly a targeted individual being targeted with neural decoding technology that has been covertly introduced in the gaming industry. People can buy this tech and use it on anyone they want. That's what's happening to me, some 'friends' decided to use it and have'nt stopped since then. It is also being used on other people all over the world.

Now, I also have OCD. These are unwanted thoughts that 'just appear' for lack of better words. It can basicly be anything, as long if you did not mean to think it.

If you have OCD, it can be a real hell to think, especially when you're being targeted by neural decoding while your having these unwanted thought. I'm sorry for the guys who had to listen and still do LOL.

Now, I tried everything from stopping the thought to thinking about other things. That did not work. You see, you can't kill a thought by another thought. It's like using a flamethrower to put out a small fire, it only gets worse.

So I begin searching the net for solutions to the OCD and the neural decoding attack. I read I needed a psychiatrist and nothing could stop the attacks. So I was starting to give up. This life was only torture for me, my thoughts and 'friends' tortured me at the same time.

Then I made a thread. There I read from various people I needed help from a doctor. I certainly agreed I needed help but pills and talking about would not help at this stage. But I kept an open mind.

Then someone stated that this could be for spiritual reasons. At first it seemed stupid that spirituality would let you that way. But when something has to be learned it can manifest itself in any way possible.

Almost there!

Yesterday somthing happened. I had an OCD thought again, but what happened, I almost DID the OCD. My negative thoughts started to affect my behaviour.

THIS my friends, was the breaking point. I was so angry at myself. Unbelievable I could let it take me that far.

I took responsibility for this and said I would not stop until I found an awnser to both problems (OCD & ND)

I searched the net again, this time I came directly to a site where the mind was very well explained and basicly not stop the OCD but slowly kill it. This has been working perfect for both problems.
(I will post a limk when I'm on a PC)

I'll try to explain.

WE are not the mind. The mind is PART of us. It basicly survives on attention. The mind brings up a thought and we choose if it's 'worthy' or not. WE give attention to the mind. What happened to me was, I was paying attention to the OCD, so my mind kept producing them to get my attention. If paid attention to it again trying to stop it, it will produce more and more while you don't even want it.

The solution for me was not only ignoring it, observing it. When you observe the mind you can reprogram it. You start paying attention to positive thought and just observe the negative ones. The site explains it so much better.

Now, since I am aware that I am not the mind, I can part myself from it and observe it. This means that my 'friends' are talking to a very negative and immature mind, while I'm just ignoring and observing it. Poor sods, the things they have heard were horrible. Ofc. I'm not going to leave my mind like this as that is irresponsible.

To me this a journey where I'm constantly learning about myself and the world.

Pffff writning on the takes to long, going add more when I'm on pc.

For now thanks for reading and till next time

reply to post by Risingfall


OCD can be tough, and educating yourself on it is important. Good to see you're doing that.

On thing you should always remember when the brain brings up one of those thoughts is that the thought is something you truly detest. It's something you morally hate. In a way you should be proud that the brain brought that thought up, because it means it's something you would never do.

It can be tough when people don't understand why they think the way they do. My sisters were playing once, older one was around 5, and she suddenly stopped and started crying. Many years later she told me she imagined herself choking my other sister to death. She had to deal with these kind of thoughts until she was an adult and learned what was wrong with her. Now she is doing great.

I hope you work through this, seems like you will.

Your tactics remind me of Relational Frame Therapy, which spun off of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. RFT is strongly inspired by Buddhism, advocating a detachment from outcomes, faith in oneself, and the ability to observe without judgement. I can't speak much to the situation you navigated yourself away from, but your course sounds well-directed and informed.