Rant time for Heff again ATS... so read and forgive me if I'm harsh... I'm overdue for my meds this morning! A list of posting "techniques" and "tendencies" that always make my brain ache a bit....

The Boomerang Insult

When someone uses insults before they think.

"I know you're a fat, virgin, hopeless loser who lives in your parents basement because you spend your time on the Internet"...said over the Internet!

Might wanna reconsider that tactic sparky. Seems a bit shortsighted....

The Double Negative Fallacy Fallacy

When someone uses a logical fallacy to accuse others of doing so.

Nice straw man, jerk. I am not even going to bother clicking your link because I am positive you're a paid poster.....

Twitch... that's all I really got on this one.

The Anxious Poster

When the reply is obviously predicated on the thread title alone.

I saw the word Islam in your title and I just want you to know that you are a racist!

I've applied this to my own life. I just watched the opening credits to "CSI Miami" and now claim the title of forensic expert based upon that experience and education. Now I can check out dead bodies and sing songs by The Who with full confidence!

The 2nd Line Brigade

I agree.
2nd line

If ever elected Emperor of the world my first act will be to make this a death penalty offense!

The Entrenched poster

It doesn't matter if you have provided me 47 links proving my position wrong. I happen to know it's right!

This one has caused me a great deal of thought and my answer? Remotely activated electroconvulsive capable kepboards and mice. Flag thread.... Star Thread... Report Thread... Shock Poster for 15 seconds.. Ahhh karma made manifest!

The cryptic post meant to imply deep wisdom

When someone posts something so brain numbingly off topic and patronizing that you actually end up reading it fifteen times just to make sure you weren't actaually overreacting to it the first fourteen times.

You have chipped a shard away from the great stone of truth- now just analyze that chip and find the secret wisdom only a few of us have the capacity to comprehend!

Translation: Rehab is in my future - but I'm putting it off.for now.

The Secret Agent Man Scenario

When someone posts something totally unfounded and then tried to give it "meat" by saying:

I only know this because of the decades I speng working in covert operations - in THIS particular subject and posses reams of information about it that I cannot legally even begin to discuss or elude to

Ummm... eluding to the undiscosable information you subtly hinted towards you, in point of fact, have already vioated your ( supposed ) non-disclosure agreement. So why stop?

And my all time favorite...

The Nanny Nanny Boo Boo

When a poster says something along the lines of:

Of course I know far more about this subject than you ever will! But I will not waste my time explaining it to such an unworthy human being!

Of course there are others.... But feel quite happy getting just these seven off of my chest!

Anyone have any others they'd like to vent about? If so, the podium is yours!

Thanks for reading!

~Heff

A seed is planted and now it needs water and sun, and from the earth shall spring forth something new and wholesome, and it will be beautiful.

vvv

#9 When someone makes eight points and says they made seven.

But feel quite happy getting just these seven off of my chest!

4th line

ETA: eh. sort of ruining the 4th line punchline here but it sort of annoys me when someone posts nothing but a picture and gets like 15 stars.

Don't stop doing it, they're usually good for a laugh or something.

And I'm probably just frustrated because I spent 10 minutes thinking, finding sources, and writing a five paragraph response for 0-2 stars.

Number 10...

Get your heading/wording correct

It's 'Faux Pas' not Faux Paus

Originally posted by blupblup
Number 10...

Get your heading/wording correct

It's 'Faux Pas' not Faus Paus

Actually he said Faux Paus, not Faus Paus. You are however correct, it is Faux Pas. However -100 internet points for quoting his title wrong.

Nevermind, you corrected it.


vvv

Anyone who posts a rant without at least a couple typos should get their thread moved to the HOAX board.


Maybe ATS should create a rule that when ranting the poster must maintain an abnormal typing speed.

Edit:

Double Posts annoy me more than anything in the OP

My title is PERFECTLY presented! :p

You are not going to notice the extra edit tag that just appeared...






~Heff

I saw the word Boomerang and stopped reading because you were obviously being racist toward Australia(and maybe trees in general).

2nd line.

I have now TAKEN my meds! Good news... the mountain of typos fixed. Bad news. Now I'm woozy and inexplicably compelled to turn my living room into a limbo danced based disco...

Can't win 'em all! Now where are my old BeeGees records at?







~Heff

you weren't actaually overreacting to it the

Not being a spelling nazi, but there is an error there. I will not point it out, because I don't want to waste my time on this.

vvv

Apparently I get to post #11 unless of course someone takes it and posts prior to myself completing this one and I have to go back and edit it all over because I added this run on sentence in explanation of something that is already understood just to change the number from 11 to 12 or even 13 or more due to the amount of time it took to type this all out while putting off the real reason for the post in the first place but at least I read the entire thread to even know that the next one is 11 at least as I type this and as stated above it may have to be edited due to someone else taking it.

#13 When someone edits a post multiple times and leaves all the edit tags rather than simply deleting them and leaving the single edit tag with a description of the reasons for the edits.

Elude, allude, we're all nude together.

Could just be me, I'm alone here

What about the Totally Vague Poster?

- There is something you should all know. I have a totally bad feeling about tomorrow. I don't know what it is, but it's really bad.

Always gets stars. Always gets flags. Usually gets this response.

- I feel the same way too. Don't let the haters get you down. Be strong!

The Ignorance fallacy:

You don't know what I know so you're ignorant and should not express your opinion and therefore have no valid point.

The fallacy fallacy.

You made a fallacy so that renders your entire point invalid.

The hypocrite fallacy

The guys is a hypocrite so that invalidates the point.

The loud mouth fallacy

The guy is a loud mouth so that renders his point invalid.

The you didn't see the film fallacy

You didn't see the film so you have no valid point.

The logic fallacy

You didn't use logic to back yourself up so you have no valid point.

The you didn't see what I see fallacy

I didn't see what you saw so you didn't see anything and therefore have no valid point

Just some of the many I've encountered.

guilty. as charged. You don't obviously know what you are writing about cause cause I know YOU don't! I've been writing years longer than you have!!!!! (I love exclamation points)

2.5th line....

BTW, IMHO, WCHACTY?

Uh, another line...

Love ya, Hef...