posted on Oct, 1 2012 @ 04:36 PM
Empathy - the ability to take ones own ego out of any given situation, even a passionately heated one, and to be able to see things from the other
They tend to say that money is the failure of most relationships. I disagree. I think it's ego and lack of an ability to put yourself into the other
persons headspace and to really understand what they feel. I went through this when I was married. I got laid off from a job after 9-11. I worked in a
plant that processed sheet metal and business tanked right after and directly because of that event. So, I decided to take a month off for "me". My
ex wife felt this was selfish and irresponsible. We had plenty in the bank.
From my point of view I'd spent years working in an extremely dangerous environment ( I'd had literally hundreds of stitches during my tenure - and
several other impact based injuries, though none serious ). I felt like a bit of recovery time was understandable.
She was more inclined to the idea that my month off would put our retirement plans back x number of months - which totally derailed her entire
plans and expectation set.
We never recovered from that argument and, from then on, we fought about everything. Even after I went back to work and put extra money from my own
"allowance" back into our retirement savings.
If either one of us had been capable of empathy at that point in our lives? Maybe we'd have made it. But we didn't and the animosity created in that
one event doomed us.