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You Know You Are A Conspiracy Theorist If:

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posted on Sep, 25 2012 @ 08:38 AM
From ZeroHedge this morning, some interesting criteria on qualifying as a CT. They suggest you are a CT if you answer "Yes" to 5 of the below.

Some are "tongue-in-cheek".

I am sure many of us here at ATS agree with many of these. How do you score? Feel free to comment:

•You are capable of critical thinking.
•You distrust mainstream media.
•You like nature.
•You think it’s a good idea to spend the Friday after Thanksgiving with your family rather than camping outside Best Buy to get a cheap plasma television made in China.
•You think it’s a little strange that WTC building 7 came down at free fall speed on 9/11 yet it was never hit by a plane.
•You think that drones in America might not be for Al Qaeda.
•You would like to be able to get on a plane without having to engage in a mandatory radiation bath and digital strip search.
•You have read a book in the past year.
•You think you have the right to protest.
•You think the War on Terror is a scam.
•You think the War on Drugs is a scam.
•You think the anger directed at America from the Middle East could possibly be related to our foreign policy rather than hating how amazingly free we are.
•You think the Republicans and Democrats are exactly the same on the important issues affecting our country.
•You think believing in The Constitution does not constitute a terrorist act.
•You have heard of the Bill of Rights and can even name what some of them are.
•You question whether the government loves you.
•You think the right to bear arms is not for hunting, rather so citizens can fight back should the government become a bunch of tyrannical thugs.
•You don’t own a television, and if you do, all you watch is RT, especially the Keiser Report and Capital Account.
•You don’t think the NDAA is the name of Kesha’s latest single.
•You think rich, powerful and connected people should be subject to the rule of law and go to jail if they commit crimes. Even if they are bankers and work at JP Morgan or Goldman Sachs.
•You think corporations aren’t people.
•You think Warren Buffet is a phony and a crony capitalist.
•You don’t care that Warren Buffet likes cherry coke, hamburgers and ice cream. He’s still a bad guy.
•You know that gold was made illegal by FDR in 1933 and confiscated from the American people. You know that gold bullion remained illegal for Americans to own until 1975.
•You think politicians that push for war should be sent to fight on the front lines. If they are unable, their children should go.
•You want your food to be labeled GMO so that you can make your own decisions on what you are consuming.
•You grow your own food.
•You buy raw milk.
•You think food and energy should be included in inflation calculations.
•You are aware that the Department of Homeland Security has purchased 1.2 billion rounds of ammo in the past year.
•You question whether said ammo purchases are in anticipation of a Normandy beach style landing by Al Qaeda.
•You think allowing a small group of unelected people (The Federal Reserve) to print unlimited amounts of money and distribute it as they please might not be a good idea.

If you answered yes to more than five of the 32 questions above, you might be a conspiracy theorist. You also may be on the government’s terror watch list. Be very alarmed and report it to the authorities immediately should you discover your neighbors engaged in such uncivilized thought.

posted on Sep, 25 2012 @ 08:44 AM
Geez...I answered 'Yes' to all of them but a few. Yikes. And here's one more: "You're a conspiracy theorist if you're addicted to ATS!"

I should probaby take a breather...

posted on Sep, 25 2012 @ 08:45 AM
reply to post by texasgirl

Take a breather, fall behind! Stay out front, Girl!

posted on Sep, 25 2012 @ 08:46 AM
Looks like the elite have just drawn a line in the sand and said,

You are either with us or against us.

Because i am sure every single non-elitist has 5 or more comparisons.

Oh the person could also be a vegetable or zombie as well.

posted on Sep, 25 2012 @ 08:47 AM
reply to post by capod2t

You have enough sense to realize that "conspiracy theory" is often used to label issues that should be called "unspeakable truth".

posted on Sep, 25 2012 @ 08:49 AM
ta for a good laugh... scary thing is even though not in america .. could answer yes to many of those questions...

posted on Sep, 25 2012 @ 08:49 AM
I answered yes to 6 questions

posted on Sep, 25 2012 @ 08:50 AM
reply to post by gladtobehere

Apparently not.

No Truth is unspeakable for me.

posted on Sep, 25 2012 @ 08:53 AM
OMG.......I answered like yes to almost all of them.....except the one asking me if i like farm animals in a black leather 3 piece with gold thread piping and pumps.

Yea, Im probably on someones list......too bad they'd be wasting their time with me (*hint*hint* to the guys outside in the truck that says "Flowers By Irene" and has been making a delivery for 2 weeks at my neighbors abandoned property.)

I could give 2 poops to what the Gov does at the moment....Im more interested to what happens after the fall and theyre all unemployed.

You might be a Conspiracy Theorist if you swear up and down to your family that your baked potato is receiving live communications from a sattilite in orbit.

You might be a conspiracy theorist if you put the seat down after you pee....that or a commie.

Screw the Feds and their list......they've been watching too much leave it to beaver and ozzie and harriet.

posted on Sep, 25 2012 @ 08:55 AM

Originally posted by HomerinNC
I answered yes to 6 questions

You ARE joking... right?

posted on Sep, 25 2012 @ 08:56 AM
reply to post by HomerinNC

Only 6? Geez...I think I meet the criteria of conspiracy nut then, 'cause I only answered no to the raw milk one. Man, I better keep my doors locked and my shades pulled.

posted on Sep, 25 2012 @ 09:00 AM

Originally posted by Firewater

Originally posted by HomerinNC
I answered yes to 6 questions

You ARE joking... right?

Umm, what i meant to say was, "yeah, only 4 YES's over here.
edit on 9/25/2012 by Firewater because: miscount

posted on Sep, 25 2012 @ 09:02 AM

I answered yes to 6 questions
reply to post by HomerinNC

Homer - would you mind briefing on which 6?

Just curious...

posted on Sep, 25 2012 @ 09:06 AM
reply to post by capod2t

OOh OOh Well.............I got 100% correct

Wadda I win?

Ahh, this was a test right

posted on Sep, 25 2012 @ 09:07 AM
I answered yes to almost all of them
ooh should i be scared

posted on Sep, 25 2012 @ 09:21 AM
I answered yes to all but three of the questions. Does that mean I get to co-host with Jesse Ventura in the new season of Conspiracy Theory now? I'll be waiting for the call....

posted on Sep, 25 2012 @ 09:29 AM
reply to post by capod2t

A lot of people would answer yes to these questions, conspiracy theorist or not.

posted on Sep, 25 2012 @ 09:41 AM
Answered yes to all but 2. I own a tv, but watch lots of other stuff. I don't buy raw milk, but only 'cause I don't know anywhere around here to get it. If the alphabet agencies are monitoring, we're probably on another list.

posted on Sep, 25 2012 @ 09:48 AM
you are a conspiracy theorist if you believe `19 Muslims with box cutters hijacked 4 airliners and crashed them under the guidance of Osama bin Laden, from a cave in Afganistan.
if you do not believe that, you are looking for the evidence that would explain 9 11.
a truther, in a word.

posted on Sep, 25 2012 @ 09:48 AM
I only got 2 no's, though I don't wear the label with pride...

Am I the only one who thinks it's sad that things such as critical thinking, growing your own food, preferring GMO labels, not spending the week before christmas spending ridiculous amounts of money on ridiculous cr*p, reading a book, being suspicious of government, etc. automatically grants you the label "conspiracy theorist"? I'm not a conspiracy theorist, I'm a realist, people who don't think critical, who don't care about GMO labels,... are NOT, that's the problem.

It shows from the typical knee-jerk reaction of calling someone a "conspiracy theorist" for the things mentioned above, it's perfect proof of how they do NOT think for themselves and instead just toss around labels that conveniently cover lots of people and hinder every possible debate. They make it easy on themselves, by automatically pretending someone is crazy, they can justify ridiculing and ignoring them, no matter what they have to say. (we've all been there I'm sure, the conversation is over before you even got to explain things)

I'm not a conspiracy theorist, I'm a normal human being. Tell any person of any civilization before our current one about the state we are in, and they will all stare in disbelief at what the human race has become. Most people are not normal anymore, at least not in my opinion. Life became one big rat-race, with everyone chasing after things they THINK will make them happy, and when they reach that superficial moment of happiness, it's over before they even know what they'll be chasing next. And the people who don't join and have better things to do (like thinking)? They're the crazy ones

If I sound pissed, I'm not
It's just that I don't like being reminded of how much I differ from the norm nowadays...

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