I'm stupid, share your stupid here., page 1

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ATS Members have flagged this thread 9 times

Topic started on 17-9-2012 @ 08:24 PM by watchitburn

So today I was fixing my screen door with the nearest tool I had available. (drum-roll please)

My knife.

Hilarity ensued as I spilled stupid all over myself. Because I'm an idiot.

Please enjoy these pictures of my stupid.

Now in addition to being stupid, I also happen to be an EMT among other things. And I was pretty impressed with my one-handed wrap job. Check it out.

So fellow ATSers, do you have a story of something you did that was stupid?
Please share.

reply posted on 17-9-2012 @ 08:31 PM by rick004

What hurt most the cut or your ego ? Lol ! I feel for you ! I've been a mechanic for over 20 years and every time I use an exacto blade I need stitches !!! Stupid is as stupid does !!!

reply posted on 17-9-2012 @ 08:37 PM by watchitburn

reply to post by rick004

Nah, it didn't bruise my ego. I have no problem laughing at myself. I think I was due for something like this anyway.

It was just very inconvenient because I was busy.

reply posted on 17-9-2012 @ 08:42 PM by PatrickGarrow17

I mistakenly put Italian dressing in my coffee, thinking it was honey. 2 days ago. Gag.

reply posted on 17-9-2012 @ 08:46 PM by watchitburn

reply to post by PatrickGarrow17

Oh man, I just remembered this little adventure I had about 10 yrs ago or so.
I was really drunk and I found a Black Widow, it was a pretty big sucker too. I thought it would be the funniest thing in the world if I bit it too death.

Obviously I'm still here, so fate was in my favor. And thus occurred the only time that I am aware of, that a Black Widow died from a human bite.

Thinking back, I am very lucky. I don't know how long a drunk person would last after taking a Black Widow bite to the tongue.

reply posted on 17-9-2012 @ 08:54 PM by rick004

reply to post by watchitburn

We have a long running joke at work whenever one of us mechanics is using an exacto knife we pull out the first aid kit and put it on their toolbox ( it's usually me !!)

reply posted on 17-9-2012 @ 08:58 PM by TedHodgson

Lovely! Stitches most definitely needed

reply posted on 17-9-2012 @ 09:01 PM by facelift

reply to post by watchitburn

I'm stupid, share your stupid here.

Upon arriving at my first station of duty (Germany) after AIT, we soon hit up the back 40 and set up a FARP.

The first thing my Platoon Sgt. asked me was to go get the Chem Light repair kit...

There is no repair kit for a chem light...they gave me hell until I ETS'd.

reply posted on 17-9-2012 @ 09:06 PM by watchitburn

reply to post by facelift

Ha yeah, there is no shortage of those.

A can of steam,

an "ID 10 Tango" form.

A prick E-7.

reply to post by TedHodgson

A few stitches, it wasn't too bad just deep. I can't make video upload from my phone, but you can see stuff moving inside.

edit on 17-9-2012 by watchitburn because: (no reason given)

reply posted on 17-9-2012 @ 09:37 PM by TedHodgson

reply to post by watchitburn

Probably tendons and muscles

Nasty, but as long as you keep the wound clean it will be no problem.

reply posted on 17-9-2012 @ 09:40 PM by Sublimecraft

reply to post by watchitburn

Things that you only ever do once..............

When I was 16 (1988) I put a plate of food in the microwave and wrapped it in tin-foil. Set it to high for 10minutes and walked off.

Came back after about 3 minutes to the "crackling" sound - freaked out - grabbed a bucket of WATER and proceeded to dowse the microwave whilst it was still running - blacked-out the house, destroyed microwave and gained a reputation all in the space of about 30 seconds - the old man came home that evening and unleashed his can-o-whoopass on my stupidity.

The old man still takes the piss out of me - he used this story as a reference to stupidity when he used to give employees safety inductions.

Thanks for the ongoing reminder old man.

edit on 17-9-2012 by Sublimecraft because: (no reason given)

reply posted on 17-9-2012 @ 10:08 PM by watchitburn

reply to post by Sublimecraft

Wow, that's classic man.

One time, I think I was 8 or 9 yrs old.
My brother had model rockets. I took the squib/electric match and stuck the leads into the wall socket. I then proceeded to stick the rocket motor on it. And flicked the switch on the wall.

Shag carpet caught fire. I got the living snot beat out of me.

Even better, the next morning I noticed the leads were still sticking out of the socket. I went to pull them out. Of course the switch was still on. Boy did I get fried.

To this day, I think I hate getting electrocuted more than anything.

reply posted on 17-9-2012 @ 10:18 PM by PatrickGarrow17

reply to post by Sublimecraft

Similar story, I went to make some tea a year ago and turned on the front burner instead of the back one with the kettle on it.

The front burner had a paper plate on it.

I went down to the basement to wait for the kettle to whistle, then smelled smoke and hustled back upstairs to prevent the house from burning down.

Also, speaking of fire and drunkenness, I've lit the wrong end of a cigarette more than once.

reply posted on 17-9-2012 @ 11:57 PM by Agit8dChop

A friend and I were in Spain doing a pub crawl..

.. we went to pub after pub after club after club..

.. you know that point, when you have a shot of tequilla and you know immediately '' crap, i probably shouldnt of had that one ''... well i got to that point.. i knew i was going to barf.

so i said to my mate

' hhmmm ugggg, ahhhh, aww.w.. duude, im garna pook ''

i stumbled around until I found a toilet.. bonzai i thought.

walk in, close door, lock door, hands and knee's, hug toilet bowl, puke and pass out.

sweet right?.. wrong.

after some time i was woken up by loud banging on the toilet door.. i shook my head and realised, crap.. im still in the club toilet.. i stood up, washed my face, cleaned myself up and opened the door.

as i exited to toilet i was confronted by a LOOOONNNNGGG line of angry women..

it dawned on me, i passed out in the only womens toilet..

I quickly stumbled out of the pub and passed out on the beach!

ID10T moment.

edit on 17-9-2012 by Agit8dChop because: (no reason given)

reply posted on 18-9-2012 @ 12:55 AM by Manhater

Learned my lesson not to use my soda as an astray.

I put the soda in the fridge, went to get a drink, next thing that happened, let's just say it wasn't pretty.

Oh, and another one, letting my sister move in.

Just curious, can you show a picture of the knife? I don't want the same thing happening to me. Looks like it was a butcher knife with that kind of cut....

OUCHIE!!!!

Hope it gets better. That looks like it really, really, hurt.

edit on 18-9-2012 by Manhater because: (no reason given)

reply posted on 18-9-2012 @ 01:05 AM by Hefficide

I got married.

Twice.

Beat that.

~Heff

reply posted on 18-9-2012 @ 01:35 AM by Sublimecraft

reply to post by Hefficide

Well Heff, seems to me you got married for all the wrong reasons there buddy, what you need is happiness.....................

Sharing........................

Understanding...................

And try to be attentive & a good listener......................

reply posted on 18-9-2012 @ 05:50 AM by watchitburn

reply to post by Manhater

Yeah, that's never cool. I may have tried to drink an ashtray or two.

It was one of these..
knife

reply posted on 18-9-2012 @ 05:54 AM by watchitburn

Originally posted by Hefficide
I got married.

Twice.

Beat that.

~Heff

Well Heff. You win.

I haven't made that mistake yet. Don't feel too bad though, I know some dudes that are on their 4th and 5th wives. Now that is the definition of insanity.

reply posted on 18-9-2012 @ 06:03 AM by Flavian

reply to post by watchitburn

Brilliant, just cheered me right up.

I did pretty much the same thing years and years ago. I was about 13 and decided it was time for a lock on the bedroom door (as you do). Clearly being an expert carpenter i decided in my wisdom that the best thing to use on the door was not the plain or chisel but my trusty old cheap as chips pen knife. As soon as i put some weight on the knife, voila, it cut into my fingers! So not only was i stupid enough to use my knife but i couldn't even figure out i should hold it the other way round so it didn't close on my fingers. D'oh!

No stupid as of yet today but it is still pretty early...........

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