My first reply since my introduction some months ago but this one kind of hit home. Sorry for it's length now and i formatted the best I could with
my tablet keyboard, my apologies for lack of indentation and any spelling errors.
Yes, seeing the posts above, I agree that schools aren't run properly but their are no other options for success in a corporate world and that is
where most are aiming for.
In my first year of high school I went from being number 1 in my class in Jr. High to failing all but one subject and failing for the year. My
parents were struck dumb. I corrected the issues and was back ranked number 1 by my senior year.
The reason for the huge drop was a bit complicated but let me simplify it. In eighth grade I was the smart kid, the quiet kid, the kid with his nose
stuck in a book. Over the summer between eighth and ninth grade I decided I wanted to be popular and have lots of friends because that seemed way
more important than grades. I changed my look, I found a click, started skating, got a girlfriend and became very sexually active. I also
experimented with some drugs. I decided that paying attention and doing homework were detrimental to my new found popularity and decided that the
cool kids never seemed to do class/homework but they always passed their classes so I could do nothing as well. Turns out I was wrong. For the next
few years I balanced between the two and got average grades. My junior year, I had an epiphany. I realized that these people were only friends with
me because I was filling the stereotypical bad boy and that these people cared nothing for me in truth. They didn't even try to help me when I spoke
of suicide or my possible opiate addiction.
Over the course of a week after my realization I broke ties with all of them. I told them all I would report their activities to the police if they
contacted me again. I got into fist fights with several of my friends just to make the break real. I didn't just burn those bridges, I nuked them
from orbit. I was pretty much hated for a few months until summer hit again.
Now that summer, I went back to my old, nose in a book self. I spent time in rehab and had nothing better than to read. I read the Divine Comedy
several times (best book ever) and started over. I met a girl at the beginning of the next school year and while she was one of the "cool" kids, she
liked me. She never judged me and never put pressure on me to be anything other than me. I went back to the top of grades, although I was asked to
not accept the senior class award given to the highest GPA for that year - Valedictorian was highest for all four years, which I passed to the girl in
second behind me because I didn't deserve it and didn't want it. I went on to marry that girl and I was ok.
Now, why do I tell you all of this? Number one, my parents never recognized what my issues were until I flat out told them - you should look into
what is going on. Number two, if these failing grades is a big change - he can recover from it. Number three - and most important IMO, know what
your kid is doing and who his friends are. He will thank you later if he is doing something that could hurt him.
Failing grades are not a failure on the parent's part all of the time, not correcting them or getting him the help he may need, whether it be for a
learning disability or other chemical/psychological issues, is a big failure. Don't expect a conspiracy website to be able to tell you how to be a
parent but don't be afraid to ask the right people - teachers especially - some of them do care, the wouldn't do these low paying, high stress jobs if
So my story is to not only show you that change is possible but that you need to get involved now before he gets in too deep. Education is the key to
today's workforce unfortunately - has nothing to do with how well you can do something but how far you went in school and who you know - both of which
college can help.
You may think the stuff he is learning is useless but it teaches thinking skills and problem solving skills which are important later in life.
I wish you nothing but the best on your problem and hope that you can find help or the source of his issues.
edit on 4-9-2012 by Blinkydoo
because: missed replies