posted on Sep, 5 2012 @ 02:23 AM
Personally? I would leave it well alone and put it to bed.
I have this ex, we broke up about 6 years ago, were together for just shy of two and a half years. We lived together, he wanted to start a family etc.
We broke up and he started going out with my best friend. And much of the fall out was as you described. Nasty communications, etc.
It got to the point where 5 years after breaking up, he was STILL kicking off about me to anyone who would listen and even sent the police to my
But if I saw him in public, he would speak to me, and be perfectly normal, chatty, jokey, TWO FACED.
Women do the two-faced thing perfectly.
And if there is anything we love more, it's to keep a guy hanging on. We're vain beings, don't hate us for it. We're great at doing the "OMG I
LOVE YOUR FACE, I'M SO HAPPY TO SEE YOU" thing one moment, to brushing you off the next.
I think it would be best if you move on, especially since the past between you is juvenile. Even if you were to start a new maturer relationship
between you both, that previous behaviour together is programmed into how you interact with each other, making it a likely possibility that you will
continue to behave in such a way once the going gets rough. And it's not just a one man deal, you would both have to make a conscious effort to not
go down that road. And when you think about it, having to work that hard to not be a d*ck to each other is probably not worth the relationship.
It took me years to learn not to respond to unkind words with equally unkind words. If she texts you some hateful rubbish, either just respond with,
"I'm sorry you feel that way, perhaps in time you will feel differently," or don't respond at all.
If you are making an effort to leave the immaturity behind you, and she sends messages that are frankly, childish, her receiving a response like that
will make her feel like she's just been served, and she'll feel stupid and not want to talk to you like that any more, because you hold the moral
Emotions and relationships are not a game, we all know that.
I think your best bet is to be her friend, but don't chase it. If she texts you or calls you and is nice, then by all means, respond in kind. Don't
bandy words with her, and don't buy her anything!!!! She's not your girlfriend, don't treat her as such. It will only make her feel
like she should send something back, or make awkwardness if either of you were to start seeing someone.
I think everyone has that ex who they wish things could have gone differently with, whether to get back together or to generally have behaved better.
Let your relationship with her serve as an example of how things shouldn't be done, and go be a really great boyfriend to someone who not only
deserves it, but also you deserve. Because lets face it, she doesn't sound like the kind of partner I would want.