Men, Who Needs Them?

Netties Hermit
Quit it you two

You're making the topic of this thread look bad.

Was there some possible scenario that makes it look good?

nenothtu

Just how useful do y'all think we need to be?

hmmmm.... mmmmmm.... :sigh:

Netties Hermit
Quit it you two

Yes mom....

LOL how in the world would women like Jessica Simpson EVER survive without a man?

In all seriousness, I hate when these types of articles come out. Why are we as humans trying to destroy the relationship between a man and a woman? Not all of them are perfect. Some are down right horrid. But when you do find the right one, the relationship can be such a wonder.

If you don't WANT one in your life, fine. But don't tell me what I should want or need. I'll probably B slap you.

CranialSponge
Whattdya mean men are becoming a thing of the past ?!



Who the hell is going to take out the garbage and mow the lawn if that happens ?!!



... or worse yet...



Who's going to fetch me my beer ??

A robot?

vkey08


A robot?

Nenothu, you are a hoot!
Men and women's minds just work differently. Viva la difference!
When I read instructions for computer fixits or tax law or programming DVD players my mind just shuts down. Same with conversations about shoe shopping.
Maybe we need to start a campaign to save the endangered male species?

reply to post by whitewave


My standard comment when asked ANYTHING during a shoe-shopping expedition with a woman is "OOOH! Shiny!" It seems to work most of the time. Most tend towards irritation when I try to turn it into a power tool or hunting equipment shopping expedition, but the smart ones let me go wandering off, before I get REALLY strange about their shoes!

I once made the mistake of hesitating when asked "do these pants make my butt look big?". I probably should have not prefaced my response with "do you want me to tell you the truth, or lie to you?", but I was floundering, and really needed to know in order to give the proper response - which never came. I still walk a little funny over that episode. It's hardly noticeable, though, when I'm carrying a big bag of trash to the curb.

Males don't need to be saved, my dear - we RULE! if you don't believe me, just ask a ticked -off and frustrated feminist who can't actually get hold of one of us to "grapple" with!

Al Bundy is not the bumbling dolt he is assumed to be by many - it's all a diabolically clever plan, a carefully crafted persona the projection of which makes life easier to deal with given the people he HAS to deal with. People don't expect as much of you when you dumb yourself down... he's not a dolt, he's a GENIUS!

reply to post by nenothtu


LOL. Yes, "shiny" is a perfectly acceptable response. My shoe shopping is quite different as I look for boots that are light allowing me to carry more in my backpack, breathable, stand up well to the abuse they ARE going to get, etc.

The only acceptable answer to the question "does this make my butt look big" is an unhesitating and resounding "NO", no matter what the truth may be. Of course, you have to actually be listening to them for that to work. That crooked walk you now have should go away with a few dozen more trips to the trash can.

I'd rather take a beating than go shopping anywhere but when I am forced to go shopping, I find myself wandering away from the group to check out the tool section (or camping section). I usually get a call on my cell phone demanding to know where I wandered off to as I'm missing the sale on shiny.

A lot of the shows on tv these days depict males as bumbling idiots incapable of finding their socks in the sock drawer. What needs saving is the valuation of males in our culture.

reply to post by nenothtu

reply to post by OpinionatedB


Sorry I missed that little tet-a-tet. I try to leave my "evil ex" stories in the repressed memory bin. Makes others feel less uncomfortable.

Men and women have their differences for which I am thankful but differences between groups will always cause schisms. I just prefer to keep them on the "light" side.

Glad he's got somebody better, opinionatedB.

reply to post by whitewave


lol... no worries, I just got home from work and I read that and was horrified, im thinking, omg people will think he is talking about me!

I am always very careful to say ex... he is a man..apparently he just expects everyone to know! lol

Just one more example of how men think differently than women! hahaha

OpinionatedB
reply to post by whitewave

 

lol... no worries, I just got home from work and I read that and was horrified, im thinking, omg people will think he is talking about me!

I am always very careful to say ex... he is a man..apparently he just expects everyone to know! lol

Just one more example of how men think differently than women! hahaha

edit on 4-1-2014 by OpinionatedB because: (no reason given)

My Ex....... blah blah blah blahhhhh...... OH WAIT my husband died, that's right.

OK now that the sillyness is out of my system..... Who the heck am I kidding no it's not...

Coffee all around, girls get the good stuff

OpinionatedB
reply to post by whitewave

 

lol... no worries, I just got home from work and I read that and was horrified, im thinking, omg people will think he is talking about me!

I am always very careful to say ex... he is a man..apparently he just expects everyone to know! lol

Just one more example of how men think differently than women! hahaha

edit on 4-1-2014 by OpinionatedB because: (no reason given)

Of course everyone knows - I'm a man! I have boatloads of exes! The field of life behind me is littered with the empty husks of my exes. Not only that, but I have sisters.... and cousins... and even friends who are female... Everyone KNOWS that was the women I was referring to. It's a no-brainer, because everyone KNOWS I won't take you shoe-shopping. It would interfere with that whole "barefoot and pregnant" thing I've got going on!

How in the devil could I keep you barefoot if we went shoe shopping?

That's why you only have 3 pairs of shoes, dear. NONE of which I bought, or even shopped for. Contrast that with the 200 pairs my first wife had, which sent me off like a sky rocket when I heard her say one day "I've got no shoes, so we have to go shopping".

She came home from college that evening to find her shoes - all 200 pairs of them - aligned in neat little ranks at the foot of the bed. Just about an acre of shoes.

It was a while before I had to go shoe shopping again.

Note to the audience: she just said "post that". it sounded like "I dare you" to me.

reply to post by nenothtu


Yes, I am humming... lol

So, you missed my point entirely dear. Let me expand...

"OMG _men_ REFUSE to have sex with _women_ more than 1 time every 3 days because they think they are NOT machines... and decide they have the right to determine the schedule for sex and put you on the damn CALENDAR like an oil change so they can be like "normal" people..."

You think people will automatically think that this is in reference to my ex? Or would you personally be mortified that someone on earth might happen to think I was talking about you, since you are married to me?

OpinionatedB
reply to post by nenothtu

 

Yes, I am humming... lol

Well! THAT'S never a good thing!

So, you missed my point entirely dear. Let me expand...

"OMG _men_ REFUSE to have sex with _women_ more than 1 time every 3 days because they think they are NOT machines... and decide they have the right to determine the schedule for sex and put you on the damn CALENDAR like an oil change so they can be like "normal" people..."

You think people will automatically think that this is in reference to my ex? Or would you personally be mortified that someone on earth might happen to think I was talking about you, since you are married to me?

I dunno. I might be. What's "sex"?

Hunger making you grumpy? Can I make you a sammich or something?

whitewave

A lot of the shows on tv these days depict males as bumbling idiots incapable of finding their socks in the sock drawer. What needs saving is the valuation of males in our culture.

We have SOCK DRAWERS? What OTHER kinds of secrets are women keeping form us? I thought they just magically appeared in the mornings when I'm getting dressed - some sort of Star Trek replicator technology or something! Why, here lately on "forgetful" days, I've had socks magically appear more than once, on the same morning!

I guess I can cancel that call to the replicator repair man.

Then there is the conventional wisdom that us fellas value ourselves enough that any added value just swells our heads more.

I suppose value goes both ways - some guys put their gals on a calendar, others put them on a pedestal.

reply to post by nenothtu


Other secrets that women are keeping from men only because men don't listen when we tell them:
The toilet seat goes up......and DOWN
Tools do not magically put themselves back in their place
Your wish is not our command.
Sammiches do not fall into your outstretched hand. You must go get them.
Women are not microwave ovens. We do not have pushbutton control.
Asking for a back rub is not a euphemism for wanting sex.

reply to post by nenothtu


I love you dearly...

Even with all your weird manly quirks... or, more honestly... because of them.

But, seriously... we are snowed in... hahahaha ...

I am NOT shoveling! Go be manly!

What would you like on that sammitch?

whitewave
The toilet seat goes up......and DOWN

Must be that NEW fangled technology I keep hearing about

Guys are purty smart, MAYBE we could get some sort of "Made in China" microchip to get this whole up and down fiasco straitened out?

Sammiches do not fall into your outstretched hand. You must go get them.

The last time I cooked meself a sammich I caught the cat on fire.

Asking for a back rub is not a euphemism for wanting sex.

Can we get a ruling on this?