I have not seen a single post in this thread where anyone has stated that dressing provocatively is an invitation to rape them... if ANYONE dresses in a revealing manner, men, women, dogs, cats, etc... they need to understand that the FIRST thing you typically see when you interact with someone is the way they are dressed... if its not the first thing it is right up there with how you form your opinion on someone ...

You meet someone for the first time, you see their face .. you see their clothes... even before they open their mouth to speak to you... before they speak you already have made a judgement about them based on their appearance... if you say you don't I honestly do not believe you... it may not even be a conscience thought but you do... if you walk up to a homeless person dressed in rags you make assumptions .. if you come across a couple who are dressed to the nines in expensive brands of clothing, you make assumptions ...

It is human nature for both sexes and when a man walks up to a woman who has her breasts exposed to the world in an excessively revealing shirt, people will make assumptions... in my experience women tend to be the harshest critics of other women... if a woman sees another woman in a club dressing like a "whore" and writhing on every guy in the bar, please don't tell me she is not making assumptions about her...

Rape is never deserved... no one invites rape on themselves... I think we can all agree to that principle.. people do, however, invite judgements of themselves based on their appearance.

/rant off

I don't want anyone to think I am saying that making judgements is something I approve of , I was just saying that I think it is human nature of both sexes... and not always about people dressing provocatively... people judge all the time based on one's appearance .. if you went to a job interview dressed like a bum, I would be willing to almost guarantee you do not get the job... it sucks but it is what our society has become.

It would be naive not to acknowledge certain kinds of clothing are likely to attract male attention, whether or not the woman intended to do so when she put them on. Perceptions will be drawn from everything between the way you speak and the way you present yourself -- there’s no getting around that aspect of human nature, and as such, we need to be aware of the image we put out there at the very least. We’re not responsible for the actions of others, but we are responsible for the image we choose to portray -- and some looks are more likely attract unwanted attention than others, that's the reality whether we like it or not.

Having said that, everyone should have the right to put on whatever image they want to without fear of being raped. No one wants to be raped. Fantasizing about a “rape scenario” is quite different to wanting to experience a real act of rape first hand.

Real men are able to control their urges, the problem is and always will be with those that refuse to -- they're the animals, and the ones to blame 100% of the time.

Tell me honestly how you would feel if your daughter at 18 is going to music festival with fish net stalkings hooked to a garter belt which shows in plain view, under a skirt that barely covers her butt cheeks, and when she slightly bends over her ass cheeks show, and she is wearing a thong. She also is wearing a top that has a third of her breasts spilling out, and her bare midriff is showing .

Rings a bell that one...
I would assume she's with other like minded peacocks who feel safe to express themselves there and share their love of music without inviting prejudice. I'd put money on them commenting more about her awesome hair, make up and boots than her ass. If you are in a sea of bare arses and skimpy togs anyway, arses become nothing special.

Originally posted by WhisperingWinds

It was more of a shock stare, and of course boys are boys,and to expect them not to be sexually stimulated by this, and not want to act out on it, is just beyond reason.

What?

That is on the boys... not the girl
Seriously... oh those poor boys who may get horny and rape a girl/woman.... they were only acting like that because the mean nasty girl wore a skirt...



Really???

Ridiculous

I love how this thread totally negates the fact that FREE WILL comes with RESPONSIBILITIES and CONSEQUENCES!

Every choice we make has ripples in the pond people, perception is what determines if we are able to see the ripples or not…

:News Flash: The world can be dangerous.

Personally I think its gross when women dress with, for instance Daisy Dukes that are BEYOND even being Daisy Dukes, with like a tube top or Bikini top in High Heels walking In Down town Hollywood or LA ( I live in LA County) Now I see even worse than what I am describing all of the time, BUT I in no way think that it is right for ANYONE to touch them let alone rape them...Just because they are dressed less than what I WOULD deem appropriate. Now on the boardwalks and bike paths on the Ocean I see women dressed in almost nothing, and allot of em look good and are just proud of the work (or in some cases plastic surgery here) they have put into their body's and are catching rays or swimming I don't even think anything of it( I am also gay ). Most guys just look and that is Okay, It is NEVER okay to RAPE anyone just because we may judge them on the way they are dressed!

Originally posted by blupblup

Originally posted by WhisperingWinds

It was more of a shock stare, and of course boys are boys,and to expect them not to be sexually stimulated by this, and not want to act out on it, is just beyond reason.

What?

That is on the boys... not the girl
Seriously... oh those poor boys who may get horny and rape a girl/woman.... they were only acting like that because the mean nasty girl wore a skirt...



Really???

Ridiculous

I never said anything about rape, now did I?

Quit putting words into my post that aren't there.

What I said is that if a female is dressing to sexually excite males, she better be prepared that they will want to act on that, such as being hit on for the purpose of sex.

Pretty ridiculous that you have to twist my words around, and accuse me of something I did not say..

Originally posted by WhisperingWinds
I never said anything about rape, now did I?

Quit putting words into my post that aren't there.

Really? You never said anything about rape?
Do you read your own posts or think before you post?

Below I will answer just a selection of your insane, contrary and just plain stupid posts.... starting with... you guessed it, where you say something about rape

Originally posted by WhisperingWindsI think many rapists are men who read the signals all wrong, or got confused with the yes attitude and the no reality, and their ego could not take being shut down.

Really... so these poor men are just raping because they're confused?
They thought she wanted sex and when they realised she didn't they just raped her anyway and it's not really their fault right?



Oh look... you said something about rape.... again

Originally posted by WhisperingWindsTo say that some women who have dressed very provocatively had nothing to do with their rape , is again wrong.

This one really takes the piss.
You're as bad as any of these crusty dinosaurs who have been doing the rounds on the news trying any which way they can to blame women for the fact that they get raped... "Wear a short skirt and get raped... and it's your own fault... dress like a whore and they'll treat you like one"

Originally posted by WhisperingWinds
To say she was not inviting some sort of sexual reaction, and looking for trouble is just foolish. Is that a legit reason for rape, of course not...

OK Mrs.Todd Akin.... and what IS a legit reason for rape?

Your heart seems to be in the right place (I hope) but your posts read like some of the most offensive, disgusting and misogynistic I've read on any of these "rape" threads.


There is NEVER a reason or excuse or clothing related misunderstanding that EVER makes rape the fault of the women.... EVER.


To suggest otherwise makes you.... well.... I'd rather not say.

What is actually being dealt with here is "GIRL GAMES"

It's very simple to understand. Just remember "the desire of the man is for the woman but the desire of the woman is for the desire of the man" and suddenly everything will make sense.

My friends and I, when we suddenly find a female has joined the group, enjoy talking cars, politics, sports, etc and generally ignoring her so we can observe how blouse buttons suddenly seem to come open by themselves and listen to her attempts to change the conversation to either sex or male/female relationships which we listen to politely and then go right back to our original conversations.
The female must be, or at least be able to believe she is, the center of attention. Deny her that and enjoy. We have discovered how amusing it is to watch a female's vanity implode.

Originally posted by Puck 22
What is actually being dealt with here is "GIRL GAMES"

It's very simple to understand. Just remember "the desire of the man is for the woman but the desire of the woman is for the desire of the man" and suddenly everything will make sense.

My friends and I, when we suddenly find a female has joined the group, enjoy talking cars, politics, sports, etc and generally ignoring her so we can observe how blouse buttons suddenly seem to come open by themselves and listen to her attempts to change the conversation to either sex or male/female relationships which we listen to politely and then go right back to our original conversations.
The female must be, or at least be able to believe she is, the center of attention. Deny her that and enjoy. We have discovered how amusing it is to watch a female's vanity implode.

Some women who desperately crave the wrong kind of attention may be like that, but please don't put all of them into one category.

I know many women who love to talk politics,and sports,etc and do their best to steer the conversation away from sexual remarks and innuendos, which many men tend to sway to with women around.

Its dangerous to group a whole gender as being a certain way because of the actions of a few.

Just a few stray thoughts on this -

As far as 'rape fantasies' go - there's actually a very simple explanation for this, as well as BSDM, and it goes for various genders and orientations - the person who wants to "submit" - what they want is to be relieved of having to choose and or make an effort.

Perhaps they feel guilty. Or embarrassed. Or fearful. Or they think sex is shameful - but they still want it. So - if *someone else* makes the decision - they are relieved of having to do that / face any conflict. Usually participation is not required either.

This can apply to other things as well.

Onto the Dress Codes

My, my ~ what I just saw at the grocery store! A middle aged - Indian? Asian? Middle Eastern couple - BOTH were wearing SEE THROUGH shirts! No foolin! Just like that thing Corey Feldman was snapped wearing the other day. The man had on dress pants, the woman a (biz style) skirt and high gladiator style hooker shoes.

I *think*, Ima guess - that these people were trying to look "dressed up". I don't think they were trying to be 'sexy'. They had their see through tops all buttoned up and the woman looked like she had a camisole or tank top under hers.

Sometimes people are trying for - one thing - and they kinda miss the mark. Or go overboard. Some people just have bad taste and / or do not realize what they look like. This can be any person of any age.

I live in a mixed Urban area, people here just dress - average I suppose. The few teens I see - average. Some schools have uniforms. The kids who work at the aforementioned store are mostly Mexican and they're all Goth.

That could work as example. It's maybe one thing to put a color dye in your hair, skinny jeans + metallic belt.
It's another to keep going and going and going - to where you have hockey pucks in your ears, nails in the head, tattoos all over face and you're now confused with ex cons and Juggalos.

Some people just don't know "when to say when". And they think it looks *good*. They think - if a bit is good - really piling it on is going to be GREAT!

*Anyone* can have this habit, too. The Little Old Lady who's hair is bluer than Katy Perry's. Some people *just don't realize*.

And my point here is - young kids *often have this problem* because they don't really 'know', the 'adults' or older peers they wish to mimic are on TV, they don't want to "look like their parents" and are eager to look "grown up".

So they start piling on. And / or going to extremes - maybe taking too much off. The boys do it too. They're just (or can be) as much of fashion victims as the girls.

Try to have a bit of understanding. They might think they look "glamorous" but they look more like Dolly Parton.

And of course plenty of adults can have this issue too.

Originally posted by WhisperingWinds

Originally posted by Puck 22
What is actually being dealt with here is "GIRL GAMES"

It's very simple to understand. Just remember "the desire of the man is for the woman but the desire of the woman is for the desire of the man" and suddenly everything will make sense.

My friends and I, when we suddenly find a female has joined the group, enjoy talking cars, politics, sports, etc and generally ignoring her so we can observe how blouse buttons suddenly seem to come open by themselves and listen to her attempts to change the conversation to either sex or male/female relationships which we listen to politely and then go right back to our original conversations.
The female must be, or at least be able to believe she is, the center of attention. Deny her that and enjoy. We have discovered how amusing it is to watch a female's vanity implode.

Some women who desperately crave the wrong kind of attention may be like that, but please don't put all of them into one category.

I know many women who love to talk politics,and sports,etc and do their best to steer the conversation away from sexual remarks and innuendos, which many men tend to sway to with women around.

Its dangerous to group a whole gender as being a certain way because of the actions of a few.

No, no. It's not the few that are like that. It's the vast majority. Unfortunately.

Originally posted by Puck 22
What is actually being dealt with here is "GIRL GAMES"

It's very simple to understand. Just remember "the desire of the man is for the woman but the desire of the woman is for the desire of the man" and suddenly everything will make sense.

My friends and I, when we suddenly find a female has joined the group, enjoy talking cars, politics, sports, etc and generally ignoring her so we can observe how blouse buttons suddenly seem to come open by themselves and listen to her attempts to change the conversation to either sex or male/female relationships which we listen to politely and then go right back to our original conversations.
The female must be, or at least be able to believe she is, the center of attention. Deny her that and enjoy. We have discovered how amusing it is to watch a female's vanity implode.

THANK YOU! Someone who gets what most girls actually are trying to do. And man am I going to do that with my friends. It's gonna be fun...