Just wanted to post.
I too have had two episodes relating to sleep deprivation induced psychosis (no history of Mania or Depression before hand). Both events were
triggered by horrible incidents, after which something just stopped me from sleeping. I literally couldn't sleep for weeks, then something would snap
inside, and well the "adventure" would begin.
Tons of similar experiences from the OP and those in the thread.
-Usually my psychosis would peak with me following "signs" and synchronicity events. Which oddly enough happen more so during said periods. The amount
of synchronicity was very eerie as if reality was locked into it, or that I was just more aware of it. It was as if I was being led some place. It was
always a positive feeling trying to get there (like I was looking for "heaven on earth").
- Sun Gazing. Literally every day I would make an effort to look directly into the sun, and felt energy from it. I didn't learn it was a real
practiced thing until early this year while researching "psychosis and staring in the sun." I would also do the same with lamp lights and the moon,
but the sun was something different. It's still crazy that Sun Gazing is a real practiced meditation ritual that I would love to practice again.
- A sense of telepathy. Reading and Feeling emotions. It was really uncanny. Not just with Humans, but more so with Animals. During one of the events,
I lived near the ocean, and would find myself going to the beach for sunrise, and walking in the wooded area next to the beach and would walk upon
animals with no fear (trust me, unlike me and odd to walk right near a Deer at dawn, without the Deer running away).
- Time slowing down (saw and avoided a car accident, Since I was blocked by a guard rail on my left and a big rig on my right, I quickly had to speed
towards the flipping car to get in front of the big rig to change lane before said flipping car smacked me on the highway. It happened in slow
- Heightened ability in Music and Art. Heightened ability in understanding song lyrics and universal messages found in movies, books, art, so on. It's
was almost as if the psychosis was locked into a true understanding of what art is. The oddest part was stringing guitars in oddest ways, that were
playable (a few of my guitar playing friends were shocked to see this, and my new found ability to play, when I wasn't proficient before hand). I've
composed many musical pieces then that I can not even duplicate now.
- Both events had a very spiritual feeling to them. It wasn't any one Religion per say, but a melding of all religions and sciences, feeling wise.
While following "signs" to find my "heaven," at times it would feel as if I was searching for Edan, or a Mt. Olympus. My goal was always to find a
perfect ending, like if I could navigate through an unwritten maze, I'd find my utopia. This was also mixed with a sense that the world was ending,
and would be ending soon (sort of a back theme to my journey).
- I was highly suggestive to others (in sort of a teacher sort of way). Sounds odd, but I had some followers here and there, include one of my
Mother's co-workers (a math teacher, who was fascinated by my theories on math during said time).
- I was almost never hungry, but would only eat small meals here or there (sometimes I would force myself to eat), but when I did the tastes were
incredibly heightened (much like my other senses during said time). During the episode I would loss a lot of extra weight, but was also was more
active (and oddly enough more athletic(doing push ups, sit ups to release extra energy).
I could go on, but I will not steal the thread's thunder.
All of my experiences were always non violent, but usually ended with me in a hospital. My family never understood what I was going through, and were
always scared about it (so much so that during my last experience they called a ambulance on me and I was involuntarily committed). The hospitals were
like prisons, and never once did the Doctors ever try and understand what caused my psychosis (sleep deprivation). They locked me in a room, and
wouldn't let me out until I agreed to taking their medication.
I was labeled Bi-Polar 1 and the whole hospital experience was inhumane and shocking to say the least. Keep in mind, before my family called the
ambulance on me during said "Mania" I was working a full time job, had my own apartment, wasn't making any crazy life threatening (to myself or
others) decisions (like spending vast sums of money, so forth) and neither my boss or co-workers could tell a difference, only finding out when I was
held in the hospital against my will for 3 weeks, that anything was wrong.
I'm medicine free now (over 2 years), and still do not suffer from Depression or Mania. But I do know that if I encountered a very stressful event
that stops my sleeping I will contact my doctor accordingly to receive the proper sleeping aid(s). I know the events I experienced sound crazy, but I
found (other then my families treatment of me and the hospitals treatment of me), both events to be extremely positive and eye opening to human
condition, and what we might be capable of as a species. If only it could be controlled.
edit on 10-8-2012 by squidboy because: (no reason given)