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My Cat Says the Darndest Things Writing Contest [APWC][WINNERS announced]

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posted on Aug, 1 2012 @ 09:41 AM



A Zebra and a Muskox walked into a bar one day.

The Muskox ordered a frozen daiquiri and the Zebra rolled her eyes said; "That figures".

The Muskox asked her what she meant by that crack and the Zebra said; "Well, you're from the far north, so frozen is what you're used to, right? Far be it for a Muskox to try something different. All you guys ever do is form a big protective circle whenever anything threatening or you're just not used to comes along. You're all so predictable."

The Muskox thought about that for a while and couldn't disagree with the statement. It is their customary instinct after all. Never run, form a circle of horns and hard heads and protect the youngsters in the middle.

The bartender (a lion) smirked and asked the Zebra what she'd like to order.

Without the slightest hesitation, the Zebra replied; "I'll have a Rum Runner


I know... bad joke, but it is all mine because I just made it up, so forgive me.


The August Short Story Writing challenge is Anthropomorphism and you can relate that to animals, the sun, moon, wind, clouds or whatever by giving human characteristics to them.

All T&C's apply

Title must contain [APWC]

Enter as many stories as you like, but post them as seperate threads in the Short Story forum.

No upper or lower word count limits

Any writing form acceptable

There will be three winners chosen, based solely on the number of flags their story receives from your fellow members.

The contest runs until midnight, August 31 and the winners announced the following morning of September 1.

Winners only will get writer status, 5 'applauses' each and included in the Showcase of Winners

edit on 1/8/12 by masqua because: (no reason given)

edit on 1/9/12 by masqua because: (no reason given)

posted on Aug, 1 2012 @ 12:42 PM
My keyboard went on strike, refusing to allow me to touch it, so I hired some scabs while the keys talk to the union boss.

The wind whistles woefully, and I concur.

I just don't get the "punchline".

posted on Aug, 1 2012 @ 01:04 PM
Speaking as white rabbit, I may enjoy this one.

posted on Aug, 1 2012 @ 02:18 PM

I humbly submit the following...



posted on Aug, 1 2012 @ 02:55 PM
I think the entries on this one will be very interesting.

Here is my first. "Conversations of the Earth" -

Thank you.

posted on Aug, 1 2012 @ 07:16 PM
Another great idea for a writing contest.

I may be inspired to enter a few stories this time.
Here is the first:

The Talking Tree And Me [APWC]

posted on Aug, 1 2012 @ 10:37 PM
Life's a Beach.

Just something I had to throw out before bedtime. There's so much potential for everyone to make many interesting entries.

Good luck everyone!

posted on Aug, 2 2012 @ 09:07 AM
My second contribution to this writing contest:

The Bird and the Brook [APWC]

Someone stop me.
Here's my third:

My Name Is Mike, and I Want To Kill Everyone [APWC]
edit on 2-8-2012 by isyeye because: (no reason given)

posted on Aug, 2 2012 @ 12:34 PM
reply to post by masqua

Here's my first attempt:Intervention

posted on Aug, 2 2012 @ 12:49 PM

Mines up!

The Night of Endless Horrors

Enjoy the madness!


posted on Aug, 2 2012 @ 01:01 PM
I'm loving the submissions already.

Don't stop, keyboards! You're singing my song.

posted on Aug, 2 2012 @ 02:49 PM
reply to post by masqua

Sentimental... The Tiger's Lament

posted on Aug, 3 2012 @ 04:30 PM
reply to post by smyleegrl
I read your story to my wife.

She cried.

You deserve the win!

posted on Aug, 3 2012 @ 10:49 PM
Sweet topic this month and my writer's block seems to have finally cleared (or more rather I'm a little less busy than usual). I'm impressed that so many peeps are writing in a more 'poetic' sorta format which I really enjoy.

Here's my entry

Little Birch and the Last Winter's Morn.

It tells the story of how masqua gets his painting panels....



reply to post by smyleegrl

Originally posted by beezzer
reply to post by smyleegrl
I read your story to my wife.

She cried.

You deserve the win!

I almost cried with this one .

Great job smyleegrl, makes me wish I still had my schnookims…

edit on 4/8/2012 by 1littlewolf because: ETA

posted on Aug, 4 2012 @ 06:07 AM
My writing style could be considered a form of gonzo fiction writing mainly inspired by the exploits of Hunter.S.Thompson and mixing in elements of film noir and gumshoe narrative. Themes such as weird discordianism and chaos magick with references to Lovecraft and other written works of similar nature are entwined into kaleidoscopic adventures sprinkled with half-truths slyly inserted.

Moonshine Avenue

posted on Aug, 4 2012 @ 01:22 PM
I love anthropomorphism! Thanks for another cool writing contest idea. My computer was offline for the last week and oddly enough, the same day you started this thread ... I was thinking about doing a particular idea in an anthropomorphic writing (which I decided against). Coincidence!

Anyway, I'm sorting through ideas for your contest. The one I'm currently analyzing doesn't follow my usual routine of mixing archetypal roles between the main antagonist(s) and protagonist(s). I haven't decided on it for sure yet.

The only thing I have decided on, is my title and the source of my inspiration - special abilities that my (or our or hubby's) real life pets have had.

Evenso, exotic animals would be more fun ... and, I reserve the right to change my mind yet again before I finally get the story spit out of the "white heat" frenzy and posted.

I might toss in a character from a 1995 book of mine - an unusual Druid for the ATS member who seems to be my only reader. I might not toss him in either. Ideas are still whirling and I'll let the "white heat" settle a bit.

edit on 4/8/2012 by Trexter Ziam because: (no reason given)

posted on Aug, 4 2012 @ 03:23 PM
link more...

I don't even care about winning the contest.
I just like the topic of this one, and I am enjoying writing and sharing.

A Warning From Your Mother [APWC]

posted on Aug, 4 2012 @ 03:25 PM
reply to post by isyeye

That's 'spirit' talking.

Nicely done.

posted on Aug, 4 2012 @ 03:34 PM
well here goes...i have submitted this under other headings but this is where it really fits....After all it is a bout an animal personified

the Hunted
edit on 033131p://f35Saturday by plube because: (no reason given)

edit on 033131p://f36Saturday by plube because: (no reason given)

posted on Aug, 4 2012 @ 03:41 PM
reply to post by masqua

Thanks Masqua...I may have channeled that story from Mother Earth herself...

...that, or I was inspired by an extremely upset mother who has a child that has hurt her.

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