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Hey guys, I'm looking for some help/collab on this song!

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posted on Jul, 19 2012 @ 10:49 PM
I'm pretty much done with this song but I can't, for the life of me, figure out what to put in the bridge of the song.

I'm contemplated leaving it as an instrumental break down, but I feel it needs some sort of profound rap or something.

Here's the song if anyone's interested in listening and/or trying it out!

Thanks you guys

posted on Jul, 19 2012 @ 10:53 PM
Purty cool actually.

Here it is:

edit on 19-7-2012 by The GUT because: (no reason given)

posted on Jul, 19 2012 @ 11:01 PM
reply to post by The GUT

Thanks for embedding it man!

posted on Jul, 19 2012 @ 11:24 PM
reply to post by Ptenjakin

oh i rap...boy do i rap....heres some throw away lyrics for you:

" they went from satanic crusadors, now theyr masonic invaders, illegal law makers, trying to take my papers, evasive toy rangers tailors of these fakers.....walking wireless with the virus, skull and cross bone pirates, vipers that fear sirus......"

keep that...its gold


posted on Jul, 19 2012 @ 11:46 PM
That's not typically my type of music, but I like that

I like how the music builds a little in the bridge. Maybe have it build to a little more intensity towards the end I feel it could get a little harder, a little more passionate there towards the end? I dunno I mess around myself with music but in a different genre. That is well done though!

posted on Jul, 20 2012 @ 07:49 AM
I'd say your strength is your vocal ability.
Why not drop all the instruments at the bridge and do some acappella vocals that start with a single voice then builds back up?
(that's what I hear anyway fwiw)
Really good stuff, not my kind of style but you're quite talented so by all means keep rocking it.

posted on Jul, 20 2012 @ 08:37 AM
Thanks for the support everyone. Those lyrics are pretty killer btw!

I've had a few people send me some stuff so I'll keep this alive when its thoroughly finished.

Yeah, I definitely do need to build it up a little more. My voice has been a little dead recently so I didn't want to overdo it with power singing at the ending.

The acapella sounds like a good idea, but I just can't let go of that instrumental break down! haha, I'm being so stubborn, but I'm going to give it a shot and open up my mind to it

PS. What would my music fall under? I never could pinpoint a genre for it.
edit on 20-7-2012 by Ptenjakin because: (no reason given)

posted on Jul, 20 2012 @ 03:42 PM
reply to post by Ptenjakin

Yeah! That's what I was thinking like power sing the last verse after building up with a bit more intensity. No idea what I'd classify it as. To me it had an almost electronic lounge R&B soul feel to it. I like your voice though
I feel you on the voice being dead. I do melodeath vocals and didn't realize how physically intense singing is.

posted on Jul, 22 2012 @ 11:39 PM
wow man this song is really good the way it is i think! i listened to some of your other songs you have great vocal talent which is hard to find these days keep at it!

i used to be a vocalist in my band but i had to stop life happened ya know but if i come across anything i think would be good ill definitely post them here for you

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