Hello, I Like Jokes

LOL...welcome....come check out this very fun thread on Avatar creations....some very funny and cool people there....your still naked.....think of what you are and anything is possible......

www.abovetopsecret.com...

reply to post by JosephKnecht


What did the impatient prostitute and the ATS member say to the JosephKnecht?

Welcome Joe!

reply to post by speculativeoptimist


I'm glad you got a few chuckles...most my favourite jokes would probably not be appropriate for this forum since it is meant for all ages so I'm restricted to the cheesy jokes. But it's all in good fun. I can't wait until I get my 20 posts so I can start discussing the real topics.

Thank you for welcoming me aboard...jk!

We can not allow this further unless we acknowledge the King of the 1 Liners, Henny Youngman:





It's old but it's still funny.

reply to post by MountainLaurel


Thank you for sharing that link, I will stop by in a moment.

You're totally right though I need to get myself an avatar.

This is high on my to do list.

What do you call a jamaican proctologist ?
Pokemon

Originally posted by jiggerj
reply to post by JosephKnecht

 

What did the impatient prostitute and the ATS member say to the JosephKnecht?

Welcome Joe!

What are your hourly rates?

Just joking

Originally posted by bluemooone2
What do you call a jamaican proctologist ?
Pokemon

What's the appropriate name for any proctologist?

Benjamin Dover.

That's an original.

Welcome to ATS.....

Des

reply to post by intrepid


You're right, that guy is pretty funny!

I have never heard of him until now so thank you for sharing that video.

Do you know if he has a lot of material to be found?

Originally posted by bluemooone2
What do you call a jamaican proctologist ?
Pokemon

That's too funny!

reply to post by Destinyone


Thank you

Yesterday evening, I had to change a light bulb. A bit later on, I crossed the road and walked into a bar.
That's when I realized my life was a big joke.

Originally posted by JosephKnecht
Do you know if he has a lot of material to be found?

Tons. Rodney Dangerfield was great as well.

I was on a bus with a friend and he told me the following joke:
What do you do if you see an Epileptic having a fit in the bathtub?

Throw in your laundry.

The guy behind us leaned over and said, "I think that's disgusting. My son died in the bath while having a fit."
We both went white and apologized. The guy got up to get off and said, "He choked on a sock."

After a really good party, a man walks into a bar and orders a drink. Already drunk and delirious, the man turns to the three women sitting next to him and says, "you wanna hear a blonde joke?" The first woman replies, "I am 240 pounds, a world kick-boxing champion and I'm actually a natural blonde. My friend here is 190 pounds, a world Judo champion and she's also a natural blonde. And my other friend weighs 200 pounds, used to be a world arm wrestling champion, and like me and our other friend, is a natural blonde. So, do you still want to tell me that joke?"
The man thinks for a while. "Um, no" he replies. "Not if I'll have to explain it three times..."

I love jokes too and I'm glad you come to ATS with a sense of humor. Okay, here's mine:

Two pretzels were walking down the street..one was assaulted (a salted)

By the way, kudos on making the best Intro thread I have ever seen! Welcome to ATS.

reply to post by JosephKnecht


I like jokes too...though I don't tell them well. I suffer from perpetually bad timing

Great username Very ATS appropriate, I am, coincidently, currently reading The Glass Bead Game...

reply to post by Biliverdin


Ahhhh one of my favourite books all time , although , I read it so long ago its pretty faded now , I just remember it really clicked with me and took me away for a week.

reply to post by bluemooone2


Loving it so far I've been working my way through his works over the past few years, but have heard that this is the pinnacle, so expectations are high, and as I have found with all his books so far, I seem to pick them up just when my mind is in tune for what he is imparting. Amazing mind and writer.