The New Assault Weapon: McDonald's Fries

reply to post by Screwed

And I, I walked over to the, to the bench there, and there is, Group W's where they put you if you may not be moral enough to join the army after committing your special crime, and there was all kinds of mean nasty ugly looking people on the bench there. Mother rapers. Father stabbers. Father rapers! Father rapers sitting right there on the bench next to me! And they was mean and nasty and ugly and horrible crime-type guys sitting on the bench next to me. And the meanest, ugliest, nastiest one, the meanest father raper of them all, was coming over to me and he was mean 'n' ugly 'n' nasty 'n' horrible and all kind of things and he sat down next to me and said, "Kid, whad'ya get?" I said, "I didn't get nothing, I had to pay $50 and pick up the garbage." He said, "What were you arrested for, kid?" And I said, "Littering." And they all moved away from me on the bench there, and the hairy eyeball and all kinds of mean nasty things, till I said, "And creating a nuisance." And they all came back, shook my hand, and we had a great time on the bench, talkin about crime, mother stabbing, father raping, all kinds of groovy things that we was talking about on the bench. And everything was fine, we was smoking cigarettes and all kinds of things, until the Sargeant came over, had some paper in his hand, held it up and said.

~Alice's Restaurant by Arlo Guthrie~

Originally posted by Infi8nity
They are a deadly weapon, the man did not use them right. Your supposed to feed them to people not throw them.

Agreed. McDonalds' food is only dangerous if ingested.

reply to post by Jean Paul Zodeaux


yeah, in Ireland we were always thought in school about how sometimes that people use law for reasons that defy common sense. It seems to happen in America more ( maybe im wrong ) i.e the famous coffee case !!!!

reply to post by AidanFoy


I have long endeavored to teach that legislation is not law, at best is merely evidence of law, and at worst is unlawful. Those that endeavor to use legislation to act in unlawful ways are simply being unlawful, not using the law in ways that defy common sense.

Some would argue that Liebeck v. McDonald's Restaurant is a frivolous law suit, others would not. I am of the mind that the verdict was absurd, but that the law suit itself is a part of civilization, government, and the need to find remedy for injury. As I understand the case, I think Stella Liebeck brought the injury upon herself and it was a combination of taking off the lid to a hot cup of coffee while sitting in the passenger bucket seat of a moving car while wearing sweat pants more inclined to absorb liquid than other materials. This combination caused serious injury to Ms. Liebeck. I do not think the fault was McDonald's and I believe the jury was simply convinced to lash out a corporation.

However, a settlement was offered which was a slap in the face to Ms. Liebeck. McDonald's offered $800 dollars for what amounted to more than $10,000 dollars in hospital bills. McDonald's erred in this regard and should have either not offered anything at all and stuck to their guns - of which they would have probably still lost the case given the jury Liebeck had, or more prudently offered to pay the hospital bills which would have resulted in a far less expensive bill for McDonald's given the $640,000 ultimately awarded her, not to mention the lawyer fees they had to pay to go to trial.

Was Stella Liebeck a greedy soul who sought to profit off of her own stupidity? I don't think so. She was an elderly woman who was badly injured and left with huge hospital bills and it is understandable why she would want to affix blame on someone other than herself, and this is why we have torte law and civil suits to settle the petty differences between us. In that regard, and regardless of the inexplicable outcome, the suit itself is actually a fine example of established justice and common law.

reply to post by Jean Paul Zodeaux


Believe it or not fries can be pretty hot and can cause burns. I have had them from an angry customer throwing them at me when I was a teenager working at Mc D's. It is all pretty much relevant to when they come out of the fryer however. You are right assault is probably the better charge if one must be charged for this. And don't even get me started on the woman with the coffee. Because having worked there I damn well know that if it were cold she would have been in there complaining.

My damn fries are never hot... :shk:

Although I find this funny in a way, the step dad went to a child's level with the child. Any parent knows that there are times we all have resisted doing something childish when our kids misbehave...Resisted being the key word.

I don't think he should have been charged though. She was not harmed in any way. Somebody needs some McTherapy maybe.

wow..I can't even finish reading your *Opinion* on this matter. In my opinion, your opinions are ridiculous!

First of all, let's answer your question about how to throw hot FF... according to you, you would have to touch them.
How about the container they come in?

Secondly... How did the guy throw them at the girl? Do you think it was all in fun? They were playing with each other?

I don't think anyone would have called the police had this been a Hall Mark moment.

Sounds like the guy was bullying this kid by the little facts I know. Mc'Donalds FF's can be very hot. I'm sure if they had just come out of the fryer and then thrown at the kid, whether physical marks were left or not... it hurt! Not only did it hurt but I'm sure the kid was horrified by this guy's action in public.

Interestingly, the report states that the unnamed girl was not harmed in the incident but states the action "could cause burning to skin and eyes."

reply to post by Jean Paul Zodeaux


Sounds like a law suit claiming the fries were too hot. Where did I hear a similar law suit? Oh, someone spilled a McDonald's coffee on herself and sued McDonald's claiming the coffee was too hot. Maybe these fries were too hot! Maybe McDonald's will have to serve cold fries in the future.

reply to post by tracehd1

wow..I can't even finish reading your *Opinion* on this matter. In my opinion, your opinions are ridiculous!

More correctly in your opinion my opinions that you bothered to read are "ridiculous".

First of all, let's answer your question about how to throw hot FF... according to you, you would have to touch them.

Of course, clearly even the "opinions" you did read you couldn't be bothered to read. I never asked how to throw a hot "FF", but instead asked:

How hot and greasy would a french fry have to be in order to be classified as a weapon?

First of all, let's answer your question about how to throw hot FF... according to you, you would have to touch them. How about the container they come in?

The actual temperature of the french fries was not reported, nor was it reported whether those fries were thrown in their container. What was reported was that he threw french fries, not a container of french fries.

Secondly... How did the guy throw them at the girl? Do you think it was all in fun? They were playing with each other?

Had you bothered to read all of my "opinions" you wouldn't have needed to ask this question. Sigh.

I don't think anyone would have called the police had this been a Hall Mark moment.

Of course, I don't think anyone would have called the police if they weren't so indoctrinated by Hallmark moments, believing every action must be one that nicely fits the Hallmark paradigm or it must be illegal.

Sounds like the guy was bullying this kid by the little facts I know.

Uh-huh. Let's repeat that quote:

Sounds like the guy was bullying this kid by the little facts I know.

Facts are not something you hold in much regard are they? Let's end with that quote one last time:

Sounds like the guy was bullying this kid by the little facts I know.

Thanks for sharing.

That had to be one naughty stepdaughter for him to waste a perfectly good sack of McDs fries. McDonalds fries are awesome. No, I am not fat. Not that fat.

reply to post by Jean Paul Zodeaux


Maybe just a family tiff, though throwing fries at the child isn't the best answer to stroppy children.

Blown out of all proportion, methinks...?

( Where I live they are rarely hot enough to burn anyone, anyway, they're ao thin they cool quickly, not like PROPER British chips...! )

The girl could have a deadly potato allergy, where even contact could cause her to have respiratory issues...

Although im guessing the step-dad threw the fries at her in a non-aggressive manor and the girl called the cops on him and gave some big water works show. Then when the judge saw the case, he laughed and sent the guy home.

What a crazy thing. There has to be other things in this because quite simply if the law is this retarded, we may as well just give up and buy our own handcuffs. Save the officers time and money.

But having said that, I recall being in a mall once, and this mother who shall remain undescribed so as to not get into that thing, had a parade of children in tow after her, while she pushed a pram full of arms and legs.

The eldest daughter was upset about something, and the mother stopped in her tracks, swore at this child with the might of a drunk sailor, picked up the first thing she had stacked in the pram along with said arms and lags, and threw it full force into the face of this child.

Swearing and telling everyone around to 'go explete yourselves ya wetjalas' she carried on swearing and stomping, throwing the pram around as they left.

I felt so sad for that family. They have no chance in life. And it makes me wonder what sort of family in the OP are living in.

Sometimes throwing an order of hot chips into the face of a child, is a sign that behind closed doors, there are far more worse things occurring.

Because I know in the story I just told, this mother didn't give a crap about who saw what, who did what or what she did... and no one would step in to save that child or be seen as a meddling do-gooder.

The OP's step-father may have restrained himself. To the brink of losing his temper as sublty as he could.

We live in a world where people are going insane. Society is falling apart. Family is nothing more than two human beings reproducing and then washing their hands... if they can even procreate.

We do not build futures for the next generation.

As a comedian I saw recently said "I don't have kids, so I don't give a crap about global warming.."

so many things can be applied to that thinking... What can you do... nothing. We're a self tapping screw being slowly tapped into oblivion, nothing will prevent our demise...

live long and prosper... or live fast, die young and leave a pretty corpse.

Color glossy photos of the garbage and implements of destruction;
Father rapers;
I want to feel veins in my teeth. We were both jumping up an down screaming,"Kill! KILL!!"
You ken git anything you want at Alices Restaurant (exceptin Alice).

Thank you... what a classic. As pertinent as ever.

How hot and greasy would a french fry have to be in order to be classified as a weapon?

Did the french fry have salt and ketchup on it?

Well then, if it hit you in the eye it could cause a very bad burning sensation. That would be AWATF:

Assault With A Tasty Fry.

reply to post by Jean Paul Zodeaux


Live in Massachusetts and you will no longer be surprised. The state constantly comes up with ways to deprive its citizens of liberty. Several years ago the Massachusetts school system argued in court it was an equal partner to parents in the raising of children and parents do not have any say in what morals the school system teaches children. I never followed up how that court case came out.

Ok wow, when I read the title I came into the thread and expected to read about how bad mister McDonalds been and how they're poisoning the world with their deadly french fries, slowly turning the population into over weight eating monsters while the government puts in some mind control chemicals into the fries but I'm actually more shocked over what I just read.If I was involved in that court case I wouldn't be able to keep a straight face. I feel sorry for the girl though as much as it sounds stupid, being in the middle of your parents fighting and then court cases can be a lot for someone at the age of 13.

I don´t know about other countries but the MC fries here are so mushy, you could not even provide a secure flight path with that. The greatest danger form them comes if you slip on them and break your hip

reply to post by verschickter


The father has a clear defense, he was acting to keep his daughter alive by preventing the consumption of toxic material.

reply to post by Jean Paul Zodeaux


Believe the word was "dangerous" and not "deadly" though those fries can be hot and he may have tossed them from a container. You just can't go throwing food at someone in public - even if it's your own family member. If a guy can sue for spilling coffee on himself you can bet tossing hot food at another person is probably a felony.
Still, there should be a place to take these "not quite court cases" so they don't cost money and tie up the judicial system. Civil matters should go to a Civil Court. The people found guilty probably end up paying court costs anyway so it looks like these are going to be some expensive fries.

Originally posted by Jean Paul Zodeaux
If this man is guilty of assault with a deadly weapon, why in the hell was he released without any bail?