Why is choosing to be single such an enigma to others? Why do people ostracize them?

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posted on Jun, 19 2012 @ 01:21 PM
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I was just watching a commercial about the new Range Rover and it struck a chord. The theme is the seventh wheel. One single guy out camping with three couples. And throughout it all, he is left out.

I’m curious as to this phenomena. Many have been through it before. Those who have broke up or divorced from their significant other. They get excluded from certain events. Why is that? Are they not good enough for you? Do they remind you of your own vulnerabilities? Or maybe they’ve never been married and you just think that’s creepy.

Why would a single friend who you think is a good person deserve such treatment?

Are you trying to protect them from being uncomfortable?

Now for the disclaimer…I like people and like meeting new people….BUT FOR GOD’S SAKE! STOP TRYING TO HOOK ME UP!


It'll come with time...and if it doesn't, oh well.
edit on 19-6-2012 by TDawgRex because: (no reason given)




posted on Jun, 19 2012 @ 01:30 PM
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I understand, but I also do not care.

It is just typical of people thinking that they know what is best for others. Personally, I enjoy being single, I do not have the desire to spend the energy to make a relationship work. If it does not just naturally work then I put very little effort in to it and it is what it is. When it comes to relationships, it seems as if society is pressuring me to abide by certain relationship rules, that I simply do not agree with.



posted on Jun, 19 2012 @ 01:38 PM
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reply to post by Skewed
 


Exactly! I enjoy being single as well. I know I can be a handful to live with.

Every girl I’ve been with over the years has tried to change me into their ideal man. (Apparently, I did have something to start with, but that wasn’t good enough for them)

I like being me, and while that may change and it always does, I’m going to let it come naturally.

What’s the saying? “Patience is a virtue.”



posted on Jun, 19 2012 @ 01:43 PM
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I think it goes with the notion that most longtime singles are sad sacks or weirdo's. I'm not saying everyone is but many are.



posted on Jun, 19 2012 @ 01:48 PM
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I think it's because those others whom seem to always be ostracizing a seemingly happy single person are the same people who (for one reason or another) absolutely fear being single. Usually these people have been in one relationship or another for 90% of their teen/adult lives and may have forgotten how to comfortably enjoy living their own life without having to rely on anyone else. Different self-concepts.



posted on Jun, 19 2012 @ 01:49 PM
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Everyone has their expectations of how people should be based on what they were taught. The primary expectation is that we all have to be the same, and like everybody else. If you're not, then there's something wrong with you.

It's all about the pack mentality, and in order to be part of the pack you must be like everybody else. In ancient times the pack was very important because it offered protection and survival. If you're not part of the pack then you become a snack for some large animal. It's hard for humans to overcome thousands of years of conditioning of the pack mentality.

And the thing about that is, most people don't know they're just following their isntincts for the pack mentality.



posted on Jun, 19 2012 @ 01:51 PM
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reply to post by herblamour
 


AH yes....Co-dependency.

That seems to be a recurring issue, it always seems that the other needs their head up my ass 24/7.
You have a point there.



posted on Jun, 19 2012 @ 01:56 PM
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reply to post by DoctorMobius
 


It goes with calling them "Hermits".

Prejudice much there?

I know plenty of weirdos who are married. You see them one the news nightly killing each other.



posted on Jun, 19 2012 @ 02:01 PM
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reply to post by EvilSadamClone
 


I think you hit nail on the head there. I’ve always been a “Lone Wolf” personality. I like the pack, don’t get me wrong. But they don’t dictate to me either.

I just like to wander so to speak and see what's out there.



posted on Jun, 19 2012 @ 02:02 PM
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the commercial is a hit piece in one regard... but resonates to the implied 'Norm' that society is paired-off with the opposite sex as being the benchmark/normal social status.


see.... the commercial is taking the stand that the '7 passenger' vehicle will accomodate the stray 'weirdo'
which in turn makes the auto maker 'open minded' and socially Inclusive'

the 7th wheel could have been a girl...but that might suggest some hanky-panky with one of the three couples... but the way the commercial was portraid--- the 7th-wheel guy was a doofus/loser/retard at the onset...

i think it was cute but when One begins to analyse the Advert... it begins to stink some

 

but the coded message of the Ad also leads one to deduce that the vehicle can carry enough camping equipment for the 3 couples and one odd element (7th passenger) in place of hauling 8 passengers (which is the strong point for other vehicles which are not old-timey SUVs)

the Ad is clever and has subliminal messages aimed at the audience
edit on 19-6-2012 by St Udio because: (no reason given)



posted on Jun, 19 2012 @ 02:03 PM
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Originally posted by Skewed
reply to post by herblamour
 


AH yes....Co-dependency.

That seems to be a recurring issue, it always seems that the other needs their head up my ass 24/7.
You have a point there.


And that leads to the current divorce rate.

I don't know whether to put a smiley/LOL or a sad face after that remark.



posted on Jun, 19 2012 @ 02:05 PM
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Originally posted by TDawgRex



And that leads to the current divorce rate.



Well, the number one cause of divorce, is marriage.
edit on 19-6-2012 by Skewed because: (no reason given)



posted on Jun, 19 2012 @ 02:21 PM
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reply to post by Skewed
 


That has always been a favorite sayin' of mine.

Along with "Nobody gets out of this life alive."



posted on Jun, 19 2012 @ 02:21 PM
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Take it from a man who has been married for over 20 years and has 3 kids, there is nothing, and I mean NOTHING, wrong with remaining single. People who tell you that marriage is great and you can't live without it are either lying or haven't been married long. It's grueling, painful, challenging and in the end will probably fail.



posted on Jun, 19 2012 @ 02:24 PM
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reply to post by TDawgRex
 


Let me just say that the time and effort to create a dating ad online/go to a bar, etc are not worth it.

One ad, ZERO replies despite a short, sweet description and one of the best photos of myself that I've ever had in which I appear CONFIDENT!

People keep telling me to not give up but at this rate, I'm giving up anyway. I no longer want to contribute to the further degradation of this shallow society by conforming to obsolete dating and relationship "rules".



posted on Jun, 19 2012 @ 02:25 PM
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reply to post by SavedOne
 


Lucky you, I bailed at 9 years.
Gave her $100 and sent her to the curb.



posted on Jun, 19 2012 @ 02:33 PM
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I just signed the divorce decree at lunch.

Load off my mind. Taking care of him was a full-time job.



posted on Jun, 19 2012 @ 02:35 PM
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Hi,

Thanks for the post, I am a 6 year single veteran!

I think people are generally afraid of our great power. We are not tied down by anything and do not have to refer to our companion for every decision in the day.

Us single folks are more inclined to be uncomfortable towards couples, and not the other way around. When i am out with a couple, i really don't want to hear their lovers quarrels or arguments etc.... When it happens i change the subject and try to steer the conversation elsewhere.




Now for the disclaimer…I like people and like meeting new people….BUT FOR GOD’S SAKE! STOP TRYING TO HOOK ME UP!



HAH! Such a good line!

As a lone wolf, my friends have tried to hook me up so many times. It's like they think there is something wrong with us and want to fix our situation. Don't try to fix something that isn't broken



Cheers!



posted on Jun, 19 2012 @ 02:44 PM
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Originally posted by SavedOne
Take it from a man who has been married for over 20 years and has 3 kids, there is nothing, and I mean NOTHING, wrong with remaining single. People who tell you that marriage is great and you can't live without it are either lying or haven't been married long. It's grueling, painful, challenging and in the end will probably fail.


I've heard the stories and even counseled the couples. Which I always found to be funny. "Hey!, Let's go to the single guy to straighten our trouble out."


I don't do that no more...no more.

But I've also met couples who just seemed to be made for each other as well. I don't begrudge them one bit.



posted on Jun, 19 2012 @ 02:45 PM
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Originally posted by The Sword
reply to post by TDawgRex
 


Let me just say that the time and effort to create a dating ad online/go to a bar, etc are not worth it.

One ad, ZERO replies despite a short, sweet description and one of the best photos of myself that I've ever had in which I appear CONFIDENT!

People keep telling me to not give up but at this rate, I'm giving up anyway. I no longer want to contribute to the further degradation of this shallow society by conforming to obsolete dating and relationship "rules".


Don't give up...just let it cruise,

If it happens, it happens.





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