Stay at home women degrade the status of women in our society.

So who is supposed to stay at home and keep the other part of our society running? These damn feminists sure are a strange bunch.

Your husband does what he is supposed to do and provide for you.........and since that is his natural role,does that mean he is degrading the status of men? Of course not.

You are doing what a woman does and your husband is doing what a man does.There is nothing wrong with and too be honest,you ARE the status of women.

I went to University in England and received my degree in Business & Finance, and spent many years being a successful professional. When my daughter was 18 months old, I realized I had a choice - that I didn't have to go down the same path as my mother, who dropped me off at daycare (later it became school and other activities) and spent partial evenings with me. Either I would continue to work 40 - 60 hour weeks, essentially letting someone else raise her.... or I would leave the professional world, and raise my own child. I chose to spend these years with my daughter.

As time was nearing for her to enter elementary school, I realized I have more choices. I would either register her in a public school, and allow the system to teach her - along with nearly thirty additional children in the same classroom.... or I would research curriculum options, determine her style of learning, consider her strengths and weaknesses, and homeschool. I chose to educate my daughter. She completed FIRST grade this year, plays violin, loves karate class, and is learning latin. She reads at a sixth grade level and loves math as well. Teaching her has never been a struggle, as we have instilled a love for learning, and have the time and focus to work through any challenges. Speaking of time, she has more time to create and play because our school day is over long before a typical public school day.

I am blessed to have the luxury of being able to make these choices. I am a stay-at-home mom... and I wouldn't have it any other way. The thought of those choices EVER being taken away from parents is incomprehensible to me... and I'd be mad as hell.

reply to post by feelingconnected


I can see what he's saying. In my twenties I encountered many of the women he speaks about. They are definitely out there. I don't want to go into too much detail but I've also met the type of women that will get a job when they are single to be more attractive. Once they meet a man, they lose the job. They don't quit, they just lose the job.

I'm not saying all women are like this, let me repeat.. I'm not saying all women do these things. Some do and it reflects badly on all women.

I apologize if I offended you. This is what I see.

reply to post by packinmomma


I wish I knew you in person, after reading that post you deserve a high five, in person.

reply to post by litterbaux


I agree that there's bad mothers & fathers out there along with just bad people. He did seem to be implying many or most are like this. I like to believe most do right by their children. If that was not what was implied well my bad. But really 10 hrs a week is laughable

reply to post by feelingconnected


Stay at home moms are 84 hours a week job. Trust me, I know. I'm just a guy but I have a single mother living with me.

The thing that surprises me the most is how far we came, considering how useless we are at a young age.

reply to post by litterbaux


Trust me I'm a mother of 3yr old twins & 5yr old, my working week is longer then 84 hrs lol. But anyway it's my choice and that's what I'm getting at who's to judge anyone decision. It's what works for us so it's what we do

reply to post by grandmakdw


I wish my wife did these things. I would rather have her home, taking care of life's details that allow me to go get a job.

Real women will attract real men.

Though it doesn't look like there are many of us left.

We might even come off as a bit sexist, but she will never be unhappy.

Even if I have to die for it.

To those who foster the next generation, I salute you and I will fight for you.

Originally posted by PurpleChiten

Originally posted by Masterjaden
It's not the op that degrades women, it's the women that are feminists. They degrade women, they degrade the roll for women in society and try to force women into roles they were never meant to have.

Women should not be police, they should not be military and there are psychological and physical reasons for both. When you start forcing people to feel they can and should play roles they were never intended to play, that's when you are degrading them, not when they take charge of the roles society and physiology has created for them and work their asses off at them.

Jaden

That's not true. SOME women SHOULD be police and should be military and are more than qualified for each. SOME men shouldn't be either of those. It's not a matter of gender, it's a matter of individuality and each person having the right to make their own decision.
The woman who chooses the military is no lesser and no greater than the woman who chooses to be a stay at home mom. The stay at home mom is no lesser and no greater than the woman who is the CEO of a fortune 500 company.
The truth of feminism is that women get to choose their OWN path, just as men get to choose their own path. It's not about one being greater than the other but the two being equal in all aspects. THAT is what TRUE feminism is about but it has been distorted by twisted people both for it and against it and made into something it isn't.

Most PEOPLE should't be police, but almost no women should. That's just the truth. That you or others don't want to admit that doesn't make it any less true. They are not physically capable of subduing men and that is one of the reasons that our police have turned into a bunch of chicken # pussies that are really just a semi-authorized gang.

I am fully willing to say that there are some women who are capable, but not when the standards are adjusted all for some feminist b.s.

Military women are NOT held to the same standards as the men and police women aren't either.

When women are forced to shave their heads and meet the same standards as the men, then and only then are the ones that make it actually deserving of it.

Military working parties are adjusted, standards are adjusted etc...

If you want equality that is not physically there, then earn it, don't expect it to be given to you. This isn't chauvinist, I'm not saying that men are superior to women, I am saying they are different and to not acknowledge those differences and the general idea that men are better in some roles and women are better in some roles is asinine and does not do society a service.

Jaden

reply to post by grandmakdw


Sounds like another thread intended to bait people who subscribe to one political ideology (feminism).

In reality, people who give birth to child after child without a friggin' clue on how to raise a child are the type of folks that contribute to this degradation.

Originally posted by LadySkadi
Wasn't the point of the feminist movement meant to give weight and value to the decisions women make for themselves? Decisions that were to be validated and accepted as legitimately as men's decision were? If true, then women who choose to stay at home are (and should be) as valued as those who choose to pursue careers. The whole point was choice...

ETA: femi-nazis are not representative of the majority, as with many typically polarizing groups, they're just the loudest.

That's the way I see it. Right thinking people understand that the feminist movement was about opening up opportunity and choice. Unfortunately the loudest and most strident voices are the most heard and give the rest of us a bad name.
Here's to not being forced into 'gender appropriate' pigeon holes. Not every man is a career go-getter, a DIY enthusiast and skilled car mechanic. Not every woman is a 'mother earth' type, who can sew or knit or make the perfect flan.
But if you (male or female) want to stay at home and nurture and be the glue that binds the household together, it's as valid as holding down a career.

reply to post by starchild10


Anyone with the ability to reason should know better to steer clear of the more extreme voices.

These folks win when everyone pays attention to them and not society as a whole. They destroy entire movements this way.

there's nothing wrong with a stay at home mom, if you think not seeing you kids make you a good parent well. sure
but the problem is most older folk were raised that way, feminist go ahead and work in a factory or a fishing boat, it's called personal choice. the thing is, ya want equal rights okay sure ya want to vote sure ya want to go out and work some stupid ass labor intensive jobs go right ahead, but the equal thing goes both ways, so don't preach to me about it.

a family of 4-5 could live fine and function from one parent working a 40 hour job, now it will take probally both parents working full time or more and still barely scrape by.

Originally posted by TinkerHaus
In my opinion, as long as the woman in question makes the choice for herself, anything goes. It's the people who believe you should be doing a specific thing based on your sex, sexual orientation, race, creed, color or religion who is the oppressor.

Funny how this particular feminazi has become what she hates.

edit on 18-6-2012 by TinkerHaus because: (no reason given)

My thought Exactly!...As long they're not being 'Forced' then who cares!...No wonder there is so MANY Wars in this world!...

Society is fractured until the devil (insert any other anti hero) lets go of the evil reins on it.

Women, in my experience are more often than not, scathing of other women, probably through societal conditioning, as well as genetically programmed as pack mentality/ competition for mates / and lack of security making them want to feel part of something to the extent of hatred of those that do not fit their own 'peer group' criteria.

At base level, often the worse culprits of categorising, hatred and fractioning society are the uneducated married women with no career that see 'married' as a status above all else and hence perceiving the 'right' to looking down at those women that aren't or that have careers or that work whilst raising children. It is an injustice to fellow womankind and that is something so called 'feminism' (in it's true form, something that brought women the vote and general rights we now take for granted) has done a good job of tackling.

Women and men naturally are suited to specific roles because of gender physicalities and psychology though that doesn't mean strict roles are required for either. Something to note, is that there are various gender types within male / female, indicating that there are natural variations in abilities and suitable roles.

I am a woman with career, also in degree education, and a mother, my priorities are in the right place but I do not categorise myself nor others in such ways, nor would I create such a thread that buys into categorising people or the obvious self congratulating that such a thread would bring, as well as the inevitable squabbling between those that place themselves as a category.

Such is society these days that most women have multi roles, as do men, all of which evolve with age and situations, avoiding blanket categorisation and challenging those that buy into it would be more appropriate than taking the words of inflammatory comments literally. See the bigger picture.

Originally posted by grandmakdw
I had just finished vacuuming and dusting our 2200 sq foot house

My senior executive daughter does “real” work,

My husband does the real work and keeps me.

Dear Grandmakdw,
Whilst I wholeheartedly agree that stay at home moms do not degrade the status of women in our society, you Dear are not also the norm in our society. 2200 sq foot house, good for you, but a little arrogant to state that when people are losing their small homes don't you think?

Senior executive daughter, mmmhmmm... good for your daughter, but did you have to state her job title too?

Not many are in your situation, so I find you posting about this to be somewhat tongue in cheek. It's like a rich woman trying to sympathise with mothers staying at home on benefits and deprived of the luxuries you seem to have.

Sorry but i'd de-flag and de-star you if I could, left a rather bad taste in my mouth.

T

As one of those 1% I'd have probably raised an eyebrow, but well you can't please everyone can you?.
All that matters is I'm where hubby and the kids want me to be.

The last time I held a job down, I was 16 and 17 years old. I'm 26 years old now, a stay at home mother, and college student. Before my husband I got married and had discussions about how we would run our home together, he said he would like for me to be at home with our child if I wanted to, but that it was my choice, and that he would support it all the way.

I'm very lucky because I have been able to stay home with my daughter, take care of her, school her, and be there for every step of her early years. Now, I'm in school earning my degree so that I can get a good job and help contribute financially. As far as my husband is concerned, none of this is necessary because he sees me as an equal contributor and is proud of our little family.

We both came out of homes where both of our parents worked factory jobs. Both of our mothers worked very hard in factory jobs, and our fathers worked hard too. My husband and I didn't have a stay at home mother.... we were raised in the day care system, until we were marched off to elementary school. We both recall our lives as being middle class and having just enough money to handle everything, BUT, we also remember our parents never having time for us. We were also latch key children for a time..... and spent a great deal of our years 9 - 13 years old at home alone after school.

Now, because we both grew up this way, we both made the joint decision together due to our personal experiences that I would stay at home with our daughter.

I am a contributor to not only my family, but to society due to my volunteer work for the elderly. I have a purpose, and I am not shiftless and lazy.

I don't care what a feminist has to say ..... they talked out the sides of their mouths in the 60's too, and told women to walk away from their families and free themselves of their "shackles" and "imprisoned marriages". The feminists told women back then that staying at home was equal to damning yourself to an empty meaningless life. Why do you think my mother didn't stay at home with me? She didn't HAVE to work, my father made enough for all of us. She told me she went to work because that is what women did in the 70's. They were encouraged to leave the home and seek out positions that would equal them to man's status.

Well, I am a woman, I am not a man. And I have no desire to try and equal myself to a man. I believe that men and women are significantly different, physiologically, emotionally ,and I don't care to challenge a man and prove that I am stronger than he is, by trying to prove myself or other such nonsense.

I know that I am strong, I know that I am equal to my partner, and I can work just as hard right beside him. I am strong in ways that he is not, and he is strong in ways that I am not.

I want to be a woman, I am proud of it and proud to be at home. As far as I am concerned, some feminists have an agenda to break up the home and destabilize it.

I'm very happy with my life and don't need someone telling me it's not enough or fulfilling for me.

Originally posted by AnIntellectualRedneck
People who buy that drivel are why women are so looked down upon in our society and were treated as second class citizens until relatively recently. Stay at home women (and men more and more these days) contribute as much to society as their working spouses do. It's just not there in everybody's faces, and that's why it's overlooked.

I used to live next door to a preschool, where I would be outside in the morning hours with my little girl playing in the yard with her, while watching other mothers dropping off their little ones left and right. I never put them down, but at the same time, I'd feel so lucky being able to be there in that moment with my child.

I realize that many women have to go to work and leave their children, and that they hate that decision, or they love it. It's really their personal business what they do, and should not be judged.

But you see, when I tell someone that I am a stay at home mother..... they kind of give me the stink eye. And a little... "Ohhhh".

I know what many people think about stay at home mothers. We are stereo-typed as the bon bon eating fat mother, sitting down to watch general hospital each day, while our husbands slave away making us more money to buy bon bons.

I have definitely gotten the "So what do you do?" And I have also encountered some moms who are jealous of my life too, being able to be home.