What is a legal way for a man to subdue a woman?

sub·due/səbˈd(y)o͞o/ Verb: Overcome or bring under control (a feeling or person). Bring (a country or people) under control by force.

I'm 21. I'm in school and live with family. Family will fight and this particular issue almost got me arrested.

I'm going to omit unnecessary details.

I have two sisters one is a year younger than the other, 14 and 15 to be clear. One of them fights with their mind and the other with her fists. The two always get into altercations since the elder is pretty much a bully. The 14 year old is the one that fights with her mind, continuously outsmarting the elder in arguments. This makes the elder mad and proceed to fight out of rage and she beats the younger down and leaves. The younger holds no grudges, so she never seeks revenge.

Today the younger finally won and said some heart touching words as she stood over her in victory with tears streaming down her face. "I'm your sister.. why do you treat me like this? Is this what you want??" etc. The younger holds no grudges and she walks away. As she walks away, the elder is on ground and tries to kick the younger in the face, she misses. The younger shrugs it off and goes to sit down in the nearest chair to finish doing her hair.

The elder gets up and starts to rush towards the elder, and I stop her, I said, "You lost, are you going to accept your loss or will you continue? If you continue, I will intervene." She says, "YES! I"M GOING TO CONTINUE!" So I standby and wait to see if she will do anything because I can't subdue her if she doesn't do anything. So she comes up behind her and grabs her hair and starts punching her in the face with all she has. I immediately intervene and apply pressure on her trapezius muscle and subdue her to the ground. "Calm down." I said. She reaches in her pocket and take her phone out. I'm thinking "Good she is going to call mom" so I let go.and start walking away. She gets up and throws the dogs' water bowl at me.... I let that ride.. it's just water and I don't hit girls/women.

So I'm talking to mom. I tell her what happen, and she is mad at me for applying pressure to her trapezius!! She isn't even concerned that her daughter got blasted in the face by a couple viscous blows.. and she says.. "don't restrain her!" I call my mother stupid and a dumba**. It really pissed me off. She rather me watch my sisters fight like dogs than to stop them by my means. It's not like I can just pick her up and move her, she has a hand full of the younger's hair.

So my mom gets home and gets in my face, gets mad because I called her out on her of her lack of concern about the situation. She tells me to get out and I say "No." she calls the police. I kinda get a little worried at this point because my mom loves to call the police on her ex-boyfriend and tell some really good lies to get him locked up. So she talks about how stupid I am and puts a lot of emphasis on the fact that I applied pressure on my sister. Trying to make it seem like I assaulted her. Anyway, the police asks for my side. I tell the truth and based on how I talk and the story of what actually happened and my decision to do what I did, the cops realized that I was upset over my mom's lack of concern. The first thing the cop said to my mom is, "Well.. he seems intelligent." The momentum shifted to my side and turned towards my sisters.

The cop did tell me that it is illegal to apply pressure to ones' trapezius and that it can be filed under "domestic violence" even in my situation.

So I'm at a standstill.... My sisters will fight again and I need a legal way to subdue the elder.

What the hell is wrong with your family?
Dysfunction much?

Want to know what to do?
Move out.

The best way to subdue the women in your situation is with a Therapist.

One possibility would be to put yourself between them when they fight, then either provoke the elder to strike you or feign falling down, in which case you have been assaulted and are justified in taking action. Just make sure you have a mark on your body when the police arrive.

Fifty years ago this would not have been an issue. The child would be put in her place and violent outbursts would be prevented in the future.

reply to post by Mizzijr


It you hit them hard enough to strike fear, they will not call the cops. 99% effective.

just look how well it works for the govt.

Sorry for your tough situation. The only thing I can think to do is next time call 911 yourself. If you think your mom will kick you out then plan a place to go before hand. Domestic violence goes both ways.

Originally posted by Mizzijr


So I'm at a standstill.... My sisters will fight again and I need a legal way to subdue the elder.

did you ask the cop? Seems they would be the best to consult, that way they cant be called out if they have given you the advice.

Yr mom sounds like a real keeper.

reply to post by TheLieWeLive

He can call, but most likely you will be the one taken away.

My best friend called 911 about his crazy drunk GF, I showed up etc.

He went to jail, it was dismissed 2 years later, after lawyers, fines, fees and jail, they found out he was innocent.

I say slap the piss out of her and scare he to the point she acts right.... Just kidding, but seriously..

reply to post by Mizzijr


In today's idiotic lawyer rich PC climate of institutionalized idiocy

I don't think there's anything you can do.

Take care of yourself.

It's clear that there's some VERY SERIOUS ATTACHMENT DISORDER JUNK deeply ingrained in all the folks in your household--you MAY be one of the healthier ones along with one of your sisters . . . in SOME respects.

In any case . . . it is likely that the police will do nothing until someone is seriously hurt. However, they will likely give you more than a lot of hurt that will follow you for the rest of your life in destructive ways.

The jerks are not worth it even if they are your sisters. The mouthy one needs to avoid the fights as well as the physical one.

Pride as a way to make up for a lack of self-worth that daddy never succeeded in injecting into his kids . . . is a poor substitute and is NEVER satisfied.

Either learn to tune it out and take care of yourself or move out and do that elsewhere.

I don't see any other viable choices.

reply to post by BO XIAN


There is, but the positive to negative ratio is 50/50 on my idea.

reply to post by Mizzijr


If you are serious get training in therapeutic holds. Mental health professionals learn this as a basic course for family therapy. The situation you described happens all the time. Don't be discouraged by what others think a "family " should look like. Your family may have imperfections, but you are old enough to give your sisters a good example.

Note: professionals are highly trained in hands-on classes for this and the holds are ONLY used to keep a person from hurting themselves or others. If you have a department of social services they can help you find a class. They are affordable and as a bonus depending on how much education you have you can be a paraprofessional or an associate professional in the mental health field.

I can't seem to add a link with my cell so I will post it here.

www.google.com... &ei=d7_WT4z0FoW09QTpkfnKAw&usg=AFQjCNHCChN9lNlRJiBk5udxdRof3nS1FQ

reply to post by Mizzijr


You are 21 and looking for a way to subdue a teenage girl???
We have names for that where I come from.
If you must subdue, it better be for a legal reason and you better be on the phone with the police.
Make sure you have a "valid" reason for calling the police, otherwise you will be the one taking the ride to the greybar motel.
My suggestion, you are 21.
Go get your own place so you will not have to fight with little girls.
You just can't win in your situation, fighting little girls...

reply to post by Mizzijr


I use my sheer rogue attractiveness, but it is only just barely legal.

Just reading your title and it seemed super creepy

To your OP I have learnt the hard way when running pubs that you never get involved in a fight between two women because it always turns out bad. Just let them sort it out themselves.

Originally posted by facelift
reply to post by Mizzijr

 

The younger shrugs it off and goes to sit down in the nearest chair to finish doing her hair.


She sounds like she deserves to get beat...and since ALL of this happened on your watch, you should be beaten as well.

Don't you EVER have kids. If you think a girl walking away from a fight to finish minding her business deserves to be beat you are unfit to be in this thread.

I would ask you what you would have done, but I believe I have a clue.

Originally posted by g146541
reply to post by Mizzijr

 

You are 21 and looking for a way to subdue a teenage girl???
We have names for that where I come from.
If you must subdue, it better be for a legal reason and you better be on the phone with the police.
Make sure you have a "valid" reason for calling the police, otherwise you will be the one taking the ride to the greybar motel.
My suggestion, you are 21.
Go get your own place so you will not have to fight with little girls.
You just can't win in your situation, fighting little girls...

This is a feasible plan for me to do. However... Mom is a dropout and needs son's help. I can't abandon my family. I can't live like that, no matter how crazy they are. I came from my place in Atlanta to come help out. Can't give up so easily.

reply to post by Mizzijr


you are unfit to be in this thread.





What sucks more - your sense of humor or this thread..?

Originally posted by Mizzijr

Originally posted by g146541
reply to post by Mizzijr

 

You are 21 and looking for a way to subdue a teenage girl???
We have names for that where I come from.
If you must subdue, it better be for a legal reason and you better be on the phone with the police.
Make sure you have a "valid" reason for calling the police, otherwise you will be the one taking the ride to the greybar motel.
My suggestion, you are 21.
Go get your own place so you will not have to fight with little girls.
You just can't win in your situation, fighting little girls...

This is a feasible plan for me to do. However... Mom is a dropout and needs son's help. I can't abandon my family. I can't live like that, no matter how crazy they are. I came from my place in Atlanta to come help out. Can't give up so easily.

Bravo to you then.
Your Moms fate is now yours, by your choice.
Loyalty is a wonderful thing, even if it drives you to your death.

Originally posted by stanguilles7

Originally posted by Mizzijr


So I'm at a standstill.... My sisters will fight again and I need a legal way to subdue the elder.

did you ask the cop? Seems they would be the best to consult, that way they cant be called out if they have given you the advice.

Yr mom sounds like a real keeper.

I thought about this after the fact. I was still a bit upset when the cops were here, so I wasn't even thinking about it. I get to talk to cops pretty often at work, so I might ask one at random.