The Alpha Male

reply to post by OpinionatedB


Thought provoking post, OpinionatedB.

You are right. Some of my additional thoughts on this topic:

I would add that a good man knows: ( With regards mostly to the woman in his life...)

How to be kind, considerate and sensitive, when the situation demands. ( Nothing to do with being a puff.)

How to respond to aggression calmly, without escalating the situation unnecessarily. ( Nothing to do with being a " Tough guy " )

You NEVER hit a woman, even under severe provocation.

How to admit when you are wrong, ( One of the most difficult attributes to live up to ! )

How to protect his family, in life threatening situations, and is willing to put his life own on the line in doing so.

How to keep calm under pressure.

Know what his wife / partner / lover / mistress / fancy woman is thinking at any given time, and respond appropriately.. ( I fail miserably at this one. )

After my wife, my favourite woman is Morticia Addams. ( Showing my age ! )

P.s. I've been married 21 years and still don't entirely know what makes a woman tick ! Though that is 21 mostly happy years with a few ups and downs, like most folk..

The whole concept of an "alpha male" is flawed... Humanity didn't make it to the dominate species on this planet by being stronger or tougher than all other species. We got where we are because of our intelligence and working together. We are weak and frail compared to all other species on this planet.

The typical alpha male these days is this puffed up, beer drinking, football watching, s*** talking d-bag... Oops forgot mental midget. A real alpha male is intelligent above all else, is fit(not muscular), isn't afraid to stand up for what he believes in even if it goes against the norm, and is able to show compassion.

A far cry from what we see today. We can all thank society for this. We seem to have ended up with this class of male who thinks they are an alpha just because of their social standing. Is it 100 facebook friends that qualify you for alpha status? Or is it solely based off how big of an a-hole you can be? Because I have never seen a group of so called alpha's give praise to one of their own for helping someone or showing any respect what so ever. But if one of them acts like a complete ass it's high fives all around.

Disclamer: I'm by no means an alpha male. In fact I don't think the alpha male exist anymore. We have all been dumed down to a state where everyone is just average and/or chemically castrated to the point where you have to be aberrant to rise above the rest. Flame away!

Most males who consider themselves "Alpha" or dominants have a stick too far up their orifice to care about anyone else (much less their female partners). Selfish, egoist and spoiled..

Been there, done that, not again!

I'd rather walk hand-in-hand... not be tossed over a shoulder like I'm some puppet.

I'm the alpha male but I'm also sensitive, caring, and compationate. I know how to be to be both and use them when needed. A real man will be a happy medium of both.

The Age of the Neanderthal is over! But I guess if you like being clubbed over the head and being dragged back to a cave, then there are some still around for that.

reply to post by JAY1980


No flame necessary. Star well earned.

Alpha males do exist.

A popular one is seen on American Chopper, Senior vs Junior.

Which is why I don't watch that show at all.

The guy's a complete control freak and an arse.

Another good example is the character Ron Pearlman plays in Blade Trinity, and of course, Hellboy.

reply to post by OpinionatedB


I have a manly man, I love everything about him except him making the decisions..... it's like taking two steps forward and three steps back *sigh

While it is great to be Alpha... so many pretend to be but are not. Personally, I am particular to the point of coldness, or that is what many males would say. Why? Because if they're unable to hold a job, hold a conversation, or even a freaking thought for longer than five seconds, then they don't need to breed, much less gain my attention. It took years to find my ideal mate. He isn't the muscle bound douchebag, nor is he a pencilnecked geek. He is a balance of physical and mental perfection in my eyes. Of course he has his drawbacks, but nothing catastrophic. He is arrogant but not without cause. He is strong without being a bully. He is witty, smart, and all the other things I thought were extinct. Needless to say, I've been with him for years, and will remain by his side through all because even if I cannot have his children, I can at least be his friend and lover for the rest of his life. I will do my best to be his strength and comfort in times of need, just as he is to me. Besides, he makes me laugh, and he appreciates my evil sense of humor!

Different women are attracted to different types. Some like alpha types, others can't stand them. Just find someone you're compatible with.

Originally posted by SilentKoala
Different women are attracted to different types. Some like alpha types, others can't stand them. Just find someone you're compatible with.

Indeed, generalizing or lumping both men and women, into various categories with check-lists of expectations and preconceived notions is why so much drama exists.

The man should protect his woman, I agree with this, care for her and love her, but ego, physical shape and build, and the visual of them being a tissue for each woe is a tad bit blown up these days. I often notice a lot of "I've been with that type, so I'm looking for something else" generalization quite a bit. People deserve their individuality, but must face the proper responsibility in the right situations and setting. Avoid culture, be yourself.

Originally posted by Isabelx
I'd rather walk hand-in-hand... not be tossed over a shoulder like I'm some puppet.

cough ... cough ... crap ... cough cough ... lies ... cough ... cough ... crap dust ... cough cough

aaaaahhhhhhhh sneeeeeze

Ok, how many of you think "Brad Pitt" is going to have a problem getting a date?

Oh my God, look at all those girls ... fans that can't hold water over the rich and famous?
The rich and famous

Ok, coming on and claming "I am perfect, everybody else is a d-bag. I'm the good guy, I'm not an alpha male ... girls, look at me ... I'm such a nice person".

PATHETIC ............ SNEEEEZE

How on earth, can you be such perfect people ... if you cannot even see the smallest faults in yourselves.

I used to say to my wife and daughter, if you love your country ... you will vote, and voice your objections to its faults. Because love for your country, is the wish to see your country improve ...

That is what life is about, it's about improvements ...

And look at me, I'm a d-bag. An alpha male, a moron and idiot. I've got my head up my butt ... hate women, hate men, hate my country ... I hate America.

I've got so many things to work on, so many things to improve ... I'm imperfect ... I'm human. So far from all you guys ... so perfect ... so much like Gods.

How I envy you Gods ...

Points of clarification:

The alpha male is not the male whom put the bruises on the bodies and minds of abused women. The alpha male is the male whom did what was needed to bring about an end to the situation which resulted in her abuse.

The alpha male is not the bully on the playground beating up and intimidating other kids. The alpha male is the young boy that stops him.

The alpha male is not the dead beat dad that doesn't pay child support. The alpha male is the male that gives his time and resources to the children of that dead beat dad.

The alpha male is not psychotic; he is your best ally against a psycho.

Originally posted by Dilligaf28
Points of clarification:

The alpha male is not the male whom put the bruises on the bodies and minds of abused women. The alpha male is the male whom did what was needed to bring about an end to the situation which resulted in her abuse.

The alpha male is not the bully on the playground beating up and intimidating other kids. The alpha male is the young boy that stops him.

The alpha male is not the dead beat dad that doesn't pay child support. The alpha male is the male that gives his time and resources to the children of that dead beat dad.

The alpha male is not psychotic; he is your best ally against a psycho.

Then let me ask the question again, more seriously.

Why does it seem to only be alphas themselves, who are willing to defend the concept?

Originally posted by bjarneorn
And look at me, I'm a d-bag. An alpha male, a moron and idiot. I've got my head up my butt ... hate women, hate men, hate my country ... I hate America.

I've got so many things to work on, so many things to improve ... I'm imperfect ... I'm human. So far from all you guys ... so perfect ... so much like Gods.

How I envy you Gods ...

I think I like this one. We should consider allowing him to continue to live.

Originally posted by paganini

Originally posted by 74Templar
reply to post by OpinionatedB

 

Problem is women want a man to be manly, yes. Chest hair and all that

Problem is they also want a man to be sensitive, a good listener, a good provider, a good father, etc ad naseum. They want to be treated like a princess and be thrown down like a rag doll at the same time. They want us to foot he bill for dinner but god forbid we open the car door... You see where I'm going with this?

How is this a problem ?a man or a woman for that matter should have more than one side to their personality and be able to show it when circumstances call for it. I don't think women asking for variety is a bad thing.

That was kinda my point. An alpha male to me is just someone who does it his way and no other way. The problem the way I see it is women want men to be this rugged alpha type, and at the same time be a whimp who cries at girlie movies. The real men in the middle of this confusing as hell conundrum are the ones who can adapt.

To put it in an odd context, my hands can be used to hug my girls at the same time as beating the crap out of anything that would threaten them. That to me is a real man, not some metrosexual tear-jerked wuss who endlessly talks about his feelings, or some carved from stone woman beater who communicates in grunts and only knows the words "kitchen" and "dinner."

reply to post by petrus4


I've seen self-proclaimed Beta males defend the concept. Their reason for doing so is that it is less stressful. They don't care to lead. But it seems like you have this warped view of what an Alpha is, but in reality that is not the true definition of an Alpha.

I'll just say this, if the Caca was to hit the fan tomorrow, all the real Alphas would emerge. Simple as that. Anybody that is completely out for themselves and no one else, is not an Alpha.


All those loud obnoxious yelling pseudo Alphas would turn to the Genuine Alphas for guidance. Either that, or from extreme envy, they would try to throw him off his game, but it wouldn't work... why? Because the genuine Alpha is not concerned about his ego or his status. He is concerned with the protection of the pack, while the pseudo Alpha is concerned with how he appears to others, not so much the safety or protection.

But once again, these types are very very rare. You won't go for a walk one day and run into an Alpha. Go for a walk for a couple thousand days, and you might catch one walking with a natural stride of confidence. Not that overcompensated gorilla walk that some D-Bags do.

But again... very rare so *Shrugs and heads back to the Celtics game*.

Originally posted by Dilligaf28
Points of clarification:

The alpha male is not the male whom put the bruises on the bodies and minds of abused women. The alpha male is the male whom did what was needed to bring about an end to the situation which resulted in her abuse.

The alpha male is not the bully on the playground beating up and intimidating other kids. The alpha male is the young boy that stops him.

The alpha male is not the dead beat dad that doesn't pay child support. The alpha male is the male that gives his time and resources to the children of that dead beat dad.

The alpha male is not psychotic; he is your best ally against a psycho.

How about that? I raised an Alpha male, then! My dad was one, too. Evidently it must skip generations.

It seems so far the references to Alpha males in the animal kingdom have been to wolves:

Originally posted by Q2IN2Y

the genuine Alpha is not concerned about his ego or his status. He is concerned with the protection of the pack, while the pseudo Alpha is concerned with how he appears to others, not so much the safety or protection.

Originally posted by OpinionatedB

I had a male wolf in my home who was an alpha male.... he was what I equate alpha to...

.....that is an alpha male from the animal kingdom.... in the human kingdom an alpha would be quite similar... just a little more domesticated in my opinion (ie: he would not hunt the neighbors domesticated animals!

)

Originally posted by nenothtu

Chasing tail and collecting women? Nope, that doesn't fit, either. Wolves mate for life, and the Alphas are faithful to one another. Both care for their cubs and protect them, because they realize at some level that those cubs are the future.

Wolves are not the human being's closest aniaml relative, the primates are. Alpha male primates don't mate with a single female for life, they possess harems of females. The social agenda of the primate alpha is domination and measured aggression and suppression of the junior males who threaten his position of dominance. That is what human beings have inherited from the primate kingdom. And an aberration from that primate inheritance by eating meat three times a day does not a wolf make of thee.

Also I notice that all reference to Alpha males has been in the context of heterosexuality and male to female relationships. That is one way to look at it, but it also has to be measured in the context of male to male relationships. Alpha male behavior or nature exists for a reproductive purpose and that is to supply preferential protection to the alpha female's offspring. Women have a natural attraction to alpha males siring and protecting their young because it is programmed into them biologically.

But the alpha male also exists in relation to a hierarchy of dominance within male to male relationships. The alpha male is particularly defined in prison communities. The alphas are the ones who don't become another prisoner's bitch. Even in primate cultures, subordinate males have to 'assume the position' and allow an alpha male to mount them where they dry hump them to assert their dominant status. So in the primate world being an alpha male is a dual role as it relates to females and subordinate males.

The band 'The Village People' is projecting the image of Alpha males within the homosexual community.

You can dress this issue up however you like and glorify it with some romantic notions, but it remains a an issue of primitive behavior.

Originally posted by petrus4
The thing that I've noticed about alphas, is that the only people who defend the concept, are people who think they're alphas themselves.

The rest of us just call a spade a spade, and a psychopath a psychopath.

Yes, well that's something to think about too.

And why do so-called Alpha males always end up with girlfriends who are either half their height or half their weight?

If they are so dominant and in control, why don't they seek women of their own height and weight?

And women who seek these alpha males always seek males who are almost nearly double their own height and weight. This is what is known as 'blind biology'.

Originally posted by Golden Rule

Looking at this pic makes me think that some of my relatives also somehow made it to Earth.

(Notoe for the humour-impaired: This is a joke, relating to my avatar. It is not a case of me seriously claiming to be an extraterrestrial; so you don't need to chase me through multiple threads and accuse me of being mentally ill)