posted on Jun, 7 2012 @ 11:25 AM
A stress relieving exercise or an exercise in honesty, take your pick.
For as long as I can remember, I had a fear of Hell. The idea of burning forever just didn't sound all that appealing, imagine that? So, I lived my
life by the tendents I thought applied to avoid such a fate. I like to believe I have always been a generous and honest soul. If someone needed a
hand, I was quick to hop up and help out.
This taught me a few things in my few years:
A) Most people claim to want to hear the truth, to not be talked about behind their backs, to not be a gossip.
the reality: When people are faced with anything that contradicts their idea of what "truth" is, the reaction is never positive. Therefore, most
talk about those things that bother them about someone behind their back, or, as a gossip.
B) People want to make the world a better place.
the reality: People want others to make the world a better place for them.
C) A good deed is it's own reward
the reality: No good deed ever goes unpunished.
D) Loyalty is a good trait to have and share.
the reality: Most people will turn their backs on you the moment of first convenience. That is to say, as soon as there is an offer on the table that
entices them to become a betrayer. This person could be anyone.
When measuring up to the requirements of scripture, I'm pretty sure I'm going to hell. Why a being described as one of love and forgiveness, even
onto the cross, would be sending billions into a lake of fire for all eternity seems not only Hitler-esc, it seems a literal infinity worse. It's
just such a contradiction, it makes me think, "How much of this is bullspit, and how much can I really believe in?"
Now, I know from my own experiences there is a divine, and divine intervention in this existence. Scripture states though, all the demons know this
too, and that knowledge won't do you much good, since all you now know is that eventually, life is going to suck, forever.
The only reason I continue on, bother to get up in the morning anymore, is for the sake of my young son. This, in itself, is a commandment break. I
just put my kid ahead of God. A true christian serves God with every moment of their life, joyfully, if I'm not mistaken. I have fallen miles short
of this condition, and therefore, have damned myself to hell. Ain't that a bib?
When I was young, I use to fear hell, and the eternity there. Now-a-days, I just stick around to enjoy the company of my child. To raise him to be a
decent human being in a world that devours good guys for breakfast, and stacks gold at the feet of those who would do any evil it takes to add one
more nickle to their pot. It's an impossible task. I truly savor these early years, before the world has it's chance to snatch up his innocence in
In all honesty, I don't want to spend an eternity with a being that couldn't find a better way than to eternally burn someone for all because they
fell for a deception, perpetrated by Lucifer, but allowed by that very being. He knew you would be deceived, and yet the only out given was one based
off faith. Well, if you're deceived, you won't get that faith, now will you?
I suppose that's why God calls them the chosen elect, known before birth. Because, only a certain pick of the liter was good enough. The rest of
us...well, enjoy the pound. Now remember, this is a God of infinite power, so it's not like he couldn't afford the rest of us. It's not like he's
so frickin awesome he couldn't spend that extra time (immortal and all) to help sort people out of this deception. In his own words, "if your
brother sins against you seven times, forgive him seven times." This ment, when wronged, forgive. Is what's good for the goose good for the gander?
I'm starting to get confused again.
I'm twice screwed, atleast deceived guy can say, "I didn't know any better!" while they toss his weeping ass into the fire (like a nazi). I can
honestly say, "I read it, I heard it, I experienced it, and ya know what? There's still the biggest plot hole in history in it. At one end, you, sir
(referring to the Lord) are an all knowing, all powerful being. One that humbled himself to our pitiful level just to show us we could do it, without
needing God-like powers. Just a pure heart. An honest conviction that my fellow man is my family, and should be loved as such. Then, in the next
chapter, anyone not of the elect, those chosen before time, are doomed to be deceived and burn for all eternity. Well, which is it?"
You think the before the Council of Trent wrecked that book from front and back would've caught that one. Oh, but without fear, there is no tithe,
because we'd all stop worshipping money and just start doing the best we could for our family, the human race, every day.
So what's my point? I don't have one, obviously. I simply wasted your time, and mine. As scripture states, I'm this guy:
A worthless person, a wicked man, goes about with crooked speech, winks with his eyes, signals with his feet, points with his finger, with perverted
heart devises evil, continually sowing discord; therefore calamity will come upon him suddenly; in a moment he will be broken beyond healing.
As it is written: “None is righteous, no, not one; no one understands; no one seeks for God. All have turned aside; together they have become
worthless; no one does good, not even one.” “Their throat is an open grave; they use their tongues to deceive.” “The venom of asps is under
their lips.” “Their mouth is full of curses and bitterness.” ...
Behold, I was brought forth in iniquity, and in sin did my mother conceive me.
A Psalm of Asaph. Truly God is good to Israel, to those who are pure in heart. But as for me, my feet had almost stumbled, my steps had nearly
slipped. For I was envious of the arrogant when I saw the prosperity of the wicked. For they have no pangs until death; their bodies are fat and
sleek. They are not in trouble as others are; they are not stricken like the rest of mankind. ...
And my only hope:
Because, if you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.
That's all. If you bothered to read through all that, thanks. If not, I understand.