If your targets are non-LaVeyan Satanists, tell them the Church of Satan is the only valid Satanic institution. Use high-handed rhetoric peppered with
sympathetic references to eugenics. Talk down to them as hard as you can.
If you're trolling LaVeyans, claim their Church is a personality cult. Call their high-ranking members (Peggy Nadramia, Blanche Barton, Peter Gilmore)
sycophants of LaVey. Insist they only hold their positions through nepotism.
Declare all forms of Satanism misguided and corrupt, but one. Pimp the one you choose mercilessly.
Try to broker "peace" between the Church of Satan and Temple of Set. Claim you're doing it for the good of Satanism as a whole.
Remind Temple of Set members that Michael Aquino is a pedophile. Accuse him further of being one of the architects of MK ULTRA.
Tell Church of Satan members that LaVey betrayed Satan and the Church's membership with his cash-for-titles scheme and subsequent denial of the Devil
as a discrete force in 1975; insist that Aquino and the rest of the priesthood who resigned from the Church in protest are heroes faithful to
Tell them Anton LaVey cribbed his philosophy from Ayn Rand and Ragnar Redbeard, his magic from Aleister Crowley, and his look from Vladimir Lenin.
They will get butthurt even though this is true.
Condemn animal sacrifice roundly and widely. This is lulzy not because they actually practice animal sacrifice (even though they do), but because they
love hearing about it so much.
Tell them you have much in common with Satanic philosophy, but you don't see why they don't use a less inflammatory term like humanist, or atheist, or
Objectivist. Remind them that "Satanism" is not very appealing to the masses, giving their movement less popular purchase.
Ask them why there is so much Nazi imagery in Satanism. Tell them you might have considered joining if not for that.
Condemn LaVey for the treatment of his pet lion, Togare, whom he scarred for life with neglect, starvation, and regular cattle-proddings.
Ask them how the artificial human companion and total-immersion environment technology is coming.
Ask them if they ever got the Black House back.
Make fun of their Web 1.0-era site that hasn't been updated in years. Lol, frames.
Correct their Latin.
Inform them that the sigil of Baphomet is in the public domain.
Remind them that "Shemhamphorash" is not a word.
Demand to know why they seem to love Lenin so much. Imply that they are communists. Or worse, Russians.
Ask them to explain why they use Enochian in their rituals, when according to John Dee it is the angelic language.
Ask them to explain charges by Diane LaVey (ex-wife) and Zeena Schreck (estranged daughter) of regular beatings and chokings doled out by Anton.
Bring up the fact that Anton LaVey was bankrupt, toothless, and on state assistance at the time of his death.
Tell them that because their latest book The Satanic Scriptures was not authored by LaVey, it's only second-rate poseur nonsense.
Point out that Peter Gilmore is only high priest of the Church of Satan because he bought a controlling share in it from Blanche Barton. Insist that
Xerxes LaVey is the true heir and that Gilmore and Barton have betrayed Anton's vision. When they respond that Xerxes is being groomed as the heir,
tell them that's just what Gilmore wants them to think.
Ask obvious questions, and when you're inevitably told "Read the book!" by some pretty cool guy who thinks he's elite because he paid $100 to a cult,
respond "What book?"
Say that Satan would never want someone as full of fail as them, and that if they truly love Satan they should become a Mormon.
Tell them they're not even real Satanists and only follow dogma rather than walking their own sinister path.
Ask them why the inverted cross is such a common symbol in the Church of Satan, because it is a Catholic symbol. St. Peter asked to be crucified
upside down because he did not want to executed in the same manner as Jesus Christ.
Found this when I was looking for stuff on Satanism. The way I see it, if people wanna go around racking up back karma, let 'em.
9-6-2012 by protocolsoflove because: (no reason given)