I am a Zombie! And so are you!!!

All these zombie threads popping up all over the internet this past week.

And everyone thinks they would be the ones not to be turned into zombies. You think you are going to be one of the few who get to be a survivor in such a new harsh world. A total play ground to some folks!

Everyone wants to be the one who did not get bit, or turned into a zombie.
Well I am here to say. Lets face it. You are already dead and are a zombie. I am a zombie too!
The odds are stacked against you. Yet our ego's tell us, I will live through that. I won't be the zombie! Will be the zombie slayer!

No one ever says, "I will be one of the first to turn into a zombie!!"

No one ever said, I want to be a zombie when I grow up!

So I am here to say.
I am a zombie! and I did not make it. And neither did you!
How many people on ATS, and BTS would turn into zombies? 99.9% of us.

So if you think you are that 0.01% my hats off to you. And I will be coming for your brains!

Just do the math! Or better yet. I will do the math for you!
In this thread, we will have some good old fashion zombie fun. But instead of being one of the few left. We are the zombies. Going about our zombie days.

In a world that is already so full of mindless drones, and drugged out lost souls, many of us are already zombies. Just not in the undead sense.
And I am no different. I got wrapped up in some real nasty stuff the past year. And if there was a zombie outbreak, then I am a zombie!
If people want to be delusional about zombies. I won't dilute myself into thinking I would make it out alive.
Nope, life has already shown me, I am a zombie. And so are you!


Oh also. Zombies are no longer just for human anymore! Dogs, cats, all forms of life, can now turn into zombies!
So if you do live, and your pets turned into zombies. You would have to get them zombie neutered.

How do you neuter a zombie? Knock out its teeth, or remove the jaw. Chop off the arms, and leave the legs for them to walk.

I hope maybe I find a nice zombie killer who will keep me around on a leash, with my arms chopped off, and my jaw removed! Would be just like my life is now!!!

I have internalised the 32 rules of surviving the zombie apocalypse.

You ain't gettin' muh brainz !! I will double-tap you.

I think I'll survive.
I live in a very small town, the infection would probably take a long time to reach.
Giving everyone outside of the infection plenty of time to prepare.
I might be wrong, but one can only hope right?
I think I'll be fine though.
I have a bunker, a few weapons, and a stockpile of non-perishables and water.

Well, I will officially admit that I will be a zombie by next week. I know, I will have absolutely have all the time off from work. They obviously hate me anyways, considering I"m never on the schedule but only 2 days a week Joy Joy. And if another person climbs in my backyard with a gun shot wound, they'll definitely be fending for themselves cause I will be useless. I most likely will be stumbling all over the wound and would definitely will not make a good witness to the event. So I tell you now, to choose wisely at which house you go to this time. Possible victim has been forewarned. It is my week next week. No excuses.

reply to post by H1ght3chHippie


While I may not be the one to get ya. One of my zombie brothers or sisters will get you sooner or later! That is the thing about zombies. They just keep coming and coming. There is no end to us, only an end to you and the life you hold onto so dearly!
In the end you will serve

Already the math is not in your favor. Only 1 person gets to live on this thread, depending on how many replies I get. You died because you double tapped me, and did not have enough ammo for that last zombie creeping up on you while you rest from being fatigued!

All in good fun here I assure you

reply to post by GmoS719


Yep, another person with that glass half full. Sorry but your water will run out, and you will have to leave that bunker sooner or later. Yep. You just got bit. And you serve the dead in the end.. No matter how fast you run, or how far you can jump.
The Zombies will be on your heels every step of the way. And you think you are the 0.01%?

Lets crunch the numbers real fast.. Rolling my 1D12. 1, 12 sided die.
Oh sorry, the number was 3. You have been bitten, and will turn in 20 mins.

reply to post by Manhater


Alright! Yep that is the kind of attitude I was looking for While the delusions of zombies run wild. WE can be sane by knowing.. We did not make it.. And we are zombies!! Oh the irony of our sanity!

reply to post by zysin5


It's not zombies that worry us, It's the people eating people that got us scratching our heads.

reply to post by DeadSnow


That how new age news systems work my friend.
People have been eating and tearing people apart for a long long time.
Its only because of the internet that its put up to a lens. And now we are starting to see the bigger picture.

Humans are nasty animals. And have been doing some pretty messed up things for a long time..

Hence my thread.. I am a zombie, and so are you! Maybe not in the undead sense. But yeah.. Non of us are going to make it out.. Yet every person is the person who will live.
I find that to be fascinating. That almost everyone feels, they will be the "one". To live.

And then I say lets be realistic. Well its a pun and not to be taken seriously.. That is why I posted it on BTS.
I have to vent this stuff out some how. Without taking it to seriously.

Originally posted by zysin5
reply to post by GmoS719

 

Yep, another person with that glass half full. Sorry but your water will run out, and you will have to leave that bunker sooner or later. Yep. You just got bit. And you serve the dead in the end.. No matter how fast you run, or how far you can jump.
The Zombies will be on your heels every step of the way. And you think you are the 0.01%?

Lets crunch the numbers real fast.. Rolling my 1D12. 1, 12 sided die.
Oh sorry, the number was 3. You have been bitten, and will turn in 20 mins.

In a town of less than 3,000 I doubt there will be zombies at my heels every step of the way.
I'd rather die trying.
Plus, I don't wear heels. That's probably why you got bit in the first place.

reply to post by GmoS719


haha, good one! I knew I should have worn sneakers in the zombie Apocalypse, and not these damn high heel pumps!!
That is 3000 people where you are. Do not forget to count animals in there. As in my thread, everything becomes zombies.. Even the insects, all forms of life..
So if you get bit by a zombie mosquito, or get scratched by those pesky zombie cats. And Zombie packs of roaming pit bulls.
Sorry man. Your a zombie too.. Your going to have to learn how to live with it. Oh wait.. guess you will have to just deal with it.. No living with being a zombie right?

reply to post by zysin5


Everything being a zombie is a different story.
If I never leave my bunker and die of starvation or thirst I'll never become a zombie.
I win.

reply to post by GmoS719


Sorry.. Got that covered. The stuff that turned us into zombies to start with, is already in you! From everything you ate, and put into your body over the years. Only death can activate it. It was elaborate conspiracy to get the product into our food and water supplies. While the virus itself will not kill you. Once you die, that is when the products take there true affect!
Think of it like Walking Dead aspect. Even if you die of old age, you will still turn!
That is what makes it a zombie outbreak such a bad time for everyone.

The irony of that statement is. Once you are born, you are dying.

Death comes for us all..
And the sooner we realize non of us get out alive, the sooner we can all start to rebuild as zombies!

Just because we are dead and zombies does not mean we can not start a new society? heh

You can't win

I was a zombie once... once.

reply to post by lobotomizemecapin


I feel you on that. I am just coming out of a long zombie type episode in my life. It did open my eyes, and I understand now just what drugs and addictions can do to a person!
In truth, we may not have rotting flesh, and lumber about all slow and dead. But function just like any other person, but be driven by one thing.
And that I can not speak about freely on BTS or ATS.. So I will leave it at that..
But I know you can all read between the lines here. Or this post anyway.
The others where meant to be an encoded message about our lives here on earth.

I am not sure I will ever make it back to the land of the living. Its pretty bad, and its a hard cycle to break.
Being a Zombie Feels SO DAMN good.
Its hard to come back from that.

Now if you really think you have what it takes to be one of the few left on this Earth. Please explain why your skill sets will win over the rest of the world.
What makes you think, You're the one?

If you think it will help you can post your stats.
And we can make this into a turn based game if anyone is interested.

I will be the DM, or moderator of the dice rolling. And story line.
You can decide where you are at, how much supplies you have. You make your own back story. And I will invade it, and show you just how long it will take before you join me.

You tell me your skill set, and your strengths and weakness. And I will roll the dice to see how it would play out for you.
But in the end. Like I said you will serve the dead. As with this zombie outbreak.. Its already in you. All the Micky D's you have been eating. And products you put on your body, have all played a small role into the infection of the world!! Think of all the bad food, and junk you put into your body over the ages.. Its all been an elaborate conspiracy to infect every living thing on this planet!
Not just humans are zombies here. All living beings when they die.. Come back, to feast upon flesh!!
Until they can no longer function. However. Flesh regenerates these zombies. So once one zombie has feed, it can keep going for 2 months until its next meal.

Zysin5 living. 1 being lowest, 20 being highest peak human status.
Strenght-8
Intelligence-10
Dexterity-14
Wit-15
My back story.
It all started with news stories and threads online about people eating each other. I saw it as just another Trend in the new age news of this day and age. Oh how wrong I was.
I went to work just like any other day. I got the kitchen prepped and ready to go. It was a long morning with so much to do, as 2 of my cooks did not bother showing up for work for some reason. I am sure they just where out drinking to much the night before.
And now there is a line outfront of the shop, and its only 10AM! We do not open for another 2 hours for lunch.
Why are all these damn people knocking on the door, and pounding like cops banging on the door!

I unlock the wooden doors, to tell the people we will be open in another hour or so.
Just as I unlock the door, a forceful shove knocks me to the ground!
about 12 people with blood shot eyes, and a wild stare about them surround me, while I am still on the ground.
Before I have a chance to react. I am torn and gutted on the spot!
Half my face is eaten off. My body ripped in half. Yet upon my death, I feel something like a drug go over my body! This feels wonderful!!! I have never felt so GOOD!!
Yet I hunger, And the longer I hunger, the more that "GOOD". Feeling goes away.
And not until I feast upon flesh can I get that "good' feeling back.
Yet being a crawler does not make that easy. So I go after the easy prey. Dogs, cats. And other domesticated animals I can catch with my half body. Every now and then I can nab an old lady, or some careless passer by not keeping an eye out for crawlers like me.
That is until one night. Crawling and hungering for my next meal I crawl onto a property. All the gun shots from this area attracted me. And it brought me to a bunker. Just as I go to crawl inside the bunker I am shot in the head. That slows me down, and my undead body goes lifeless.. Yet this is just a trick.
However, the 2nd shot does the job. I just got double tapped!! I am done.. OUT!

Oh well.. It was fun while it lasted. But not even zombies live forever!

Next story.

I can no longer re-edit. So I just wanted to lay down the ground rules to this thread as I thought more about it.
So many different types of zombies, undead, fantasy, sci fi backstory.

So here is the back story to why no one will survive an all out Zombie Apocalypse planetary event status. That leaves very little chance of you personally not becoming a zombie.

This would mean that anyone who lived from the times of 1925-2012 have been slowly fed this research project all of their lives in every day products used in that age. This has been an elaborate conspiracy by mad scientists and holy zealots who have come to find common ground. The Roman Vatican Church, and Top scientists of the early 1900's came together with an idea that would serve their agendas both. For the church it would serve to the faithful as an act of God when the time came that the dead would rise. And for science it was just another arrogant attempt at playing God. Arrogant meddling at its finest!
Agent 33. The product used in children's cough medications, and any other type of syrup substance. It was used in many house hold everyday chemicals we come in contact with everyday. Something that everyone had access to, world wide. No one knew how much it would take to finally happen. They just knew it kept the population dull, and barely able to think for itself as a whole. But upon the "awakening" the agent not only worked on the first test subject, but made a quantum reaction in all of the other agent 33 world wide. Something in science that was unheard of with chemical reaction. This was a huge break through! Yet at the same time, that is when it happened.
Everything that lived and came into contact with agent 33 will be reanimated! Not only reanimated but brought back from the dead, the knowledge and person will be forced back within the body. This affect has a nightmarish affect on the undead. They feel no pain, however seem to be suffering, as they have manipulation powers over people who are not use to the undead. Well the smart ones, that where able to keep that small part of was once them. As in this world, there are millions of stupid people, so in this new world, not much will change on that end. The higher the IQ of the person upon death, the intelligence is retained in undeath, but used in a much more animalistic manner. Unless they come across family members, or old friends. They will use that to their advantage. Hack and Slash zombies all day long, but when you have to hack and slash the people you once loved, or a child prehaps, it becomes a much deeper scale. You are now emotionally connected to some of these things. That is when most people lose heart, and join the club.
And you will have a wide range of types of zombies in this scale of event. To many to name right now here, and get to far in detail. However the human zombies will be the ones capable of manipulating and putting the living into fear trances, shakes, sickness, fatigue!
Feeding for the dead will be a frenzy at the start. As for these undead the eating of living flesh regenerates the undead, and empowers them. The more they feed the stronger they become, and they evolve into higher undead such as ghouls, Ju Ju Zombie, Lich. The hunger never goes away, and it is not pain to them, as they feel no physical pain. But the mental anguish is morbidly crippling to any standard.
The food chain will have to find a new route. Such as down the road, it would be a powerful Lich Lord who was smart enough to keep 1 male and 1 female. And farmed them for substance. But that is for a later time. That will not happen until well after the first 50 years of this event. This is long term.

That is the back story.
So if you would like to add to that, please feel free.

The Zombie topic is trending right now.. And I have always been a zombie fan Since long long ago. I have always been a fan of Ravenloft too. Very scary stuff. And since we do not have magic, we are not going to last that long verse any army of undead, that gains a member every time they kill.
Undead armies have always been a very doom filling prospect. Not only are you killing just zombies, and undead. These undead could very well be people you know, and once loved. Killing them is not as mindless and easy as some people would take it as. Its easier to kill a zombie you don't know, than a zombie you once loved. _Zysin5_