The Ancient Ming Legend Of The Boxing Kangaroo

Boxing Kangaroos are creatures which strike fear through any well educated brave heart. Therefore in America's case it really only affects about 2% of the population. The Boxing Kangaroo is an elusive beast living mainly in the mythical 'Os-Try-Lya'-land, or 'Mini-England' as it's known to Europe. Their diet mainly consists of dust and tourists, but occasionally they eat their own back legs, replacing them with whatever is at hand. Generally dust.

uncyclopedia.wikia.com...
Ha!

According to ancient Ming legend, the great master Lendof visited Australia on a passing to the Planet Saturn to teach the Kangaroos how to fight. He got caught up with the Kangaroos, now called Boxing Kangaroos, and taught them many things including how to put fear into someones heart using your fist. After his visit as a souvenir he bought Uluru off the local people called the Abonigidals and renamed it "Air's Rock". It is still a sacred site to the local Boxing Kangaroo population.

I spent most of my childhood in Central Western NSW. When I was a kid most of my mates had roo dogs. Mostly Stag Hounds. One used a Rottie I remember when I was about 13 my best friend and I came across a mob of Kangaroos in the centre of the local Horse Racing Track. There must have been a hundred of them. In the centre was two bucks throwing down. It was awesome. Most Kangaroo dont really box. They will use their legs to tear your stomach open. They are good fighters. I had no ides that Lendof taught them to fight on his way to Saturn. He did a great job. They are smart too. I have seen them retreat to a dam,draw the roo-dog in,and then drown the dog. Dont mess with a Kangaroo. They have the Aussie spirit.


Thats a Boxing Kangaroo bashing a Doctor Who fan.

en.wikipedia.org...

reply to post by Germanicus


I love it!!! S@F
Too bad the Americans don't understand humour so they'll think your having a go at them.

So, you hate dogs, or?

But yes, kangaroos are indeed a very fascinating animal, and it seems like you have a big heart for them
I love their way to raise their new born babies.

And what was the part about Saturn again??

Originally posted by ypperst
So, you hate dogs, or?

But yes, kangaroos are indeed a very fascinating animal, and it seems like you have a big heart for them

I love their way to raise their new born babies.

And what was the part about Saturn again??

Nah,I dont hate them. That guy was demonizing Persains is all. And I was saying they had a point and I kind of agreed with them. I told that guy that I had a Staffie. I loved her.

But,yeah. They are awesome animals. I stopped rooing and shooting/spot-lighting with my mates when I was about 15. To Kill A Mocking Bird and all that. I was only ever an observer. I wasnt allowed to have a dog when I was a kid because my parents think they are dirty.

Its awesome watching them fight. Way better than UFC.

Originally posted by CrimsonKapital
reply to post by Germanicus

 

I love it!!! S@F
Too bad the Americans don't understand humour so they'll think your having a go at them.

edit on 15-5-2012 by CrimsonKapital because: (no reason given)

Yeah,just a bit of fun. Whoever wrote that is hillarious though.



And I agree. Our humour and their 'humor' seem to be very different in many ways. And why do they have a problem with the letter U? When will they start using the metric system?


And its zed not zee by the way. Even their alphabet is messed up.
Im sure they are just being difficult.

This should be in jokes n puns I shoot em and eat them for breakfast, and Australia means great southern land!

Originally posted by BULLETINYOURHEAD
This should be in jokes n puns I shoot em and eat them for breakfast, and Australia means great southern land!

I was just thinking how funny it is that at 14,a group of mates and I would jump in a ute and go spotlighting with shootguns and rifles. With no adults. Most kids in the country get a slug-gun at 10 or younger. Great shots by their teens. I lived in town so we did the rooing in the afternoons behind town in the scrub. No guns when we went rooing. Just roo-dogs.

Piggin is the big thing though. Its a step up on rooing.

And lighten up ya thread nazi


And are you an Icehouse fan?
This is for you.

reply to post by Germanicus

Dont mess with a Kangaroo. They have the Aussie spirit.

That's it bro' - a majestic creature with attitude.

For a few laughs....and check out the push kick from 1.55 - gold.


A little more insight to our local legend for those that may not be familiar with them.

reply to post by Perhaps


Ha! Awesome clips.

Woody Allen has guts. Lucky he still has it

reply to post by Germanicus

They will use their legs to tear your stomach open

is that hyperbole, or a figure of speech?
lol never mind

Male kangaroos often "box" amongst each other, playfully, for dominance, or in competition for mates. The dexterity of their forepaws is used in both punching and grappling with the foe, but the real danger lies in a serious kick with the hind-leg. The sharpened hind claws can disembowel an opponent.

lol did some googling and learned that Kang-ga-roo does NOT mean "i don't know"

still learned a few new things
'roos don't fart

Absence of digestive methane release

Despite having a herbivorous diet similar to ruminants such as cattle which release large quantities of methane through exhaling and eructation, kangaroos release virtually none. The hydrogen byproduct of fermentation is instead converted into acetate, which is then used to provide further energy. Scientists are interested in the possibility of transferring the bacteria responsible from kangaroos to cattle, since the greenhouse gas effect of methane is 23 times greater than that of carbon dioxide, per molecule.[29]

Predators

Kangaroos have few natural predators. The thylacine*, considered by palaeontologists to have once been a major natural predator of the kangaroo, is now extinct. Other extinct predators included the marsupial lion, Megalania and the Wonambi. However, with the arrival of humans in Australia at least 50,000 years ago and the introduction of the dingo about 5,000 years ago, kangaroos have had to adapt. The mere barking of a dog can set a full-grown male boomer into a wild frenzy.[citation needed] Wedge-tailed eagles and other raptors usually eat kangaroo carrion. Goannas and other carnivorous reptiles also pose a danger to smaller kangaroo species when other food sources are lacking.

Along with dingos and other canids, introduced species like foxes and feral cats also pose a threat to kangaroo populations. Kangaroos and wallabies are adept swimmers, and often flee into waterways if presented with the option. If pursued into the water, a large kangaroo may use its forepaws to hold the predator underwater so as to drown it.[25] Another defensive tactic described by witnesses is catching the attacking dog with the forepaws and disembowelling it with the hind legs.

source en.wikipedia.org...

thylacine*en.wikipedia.org...

The thylacine binomial name: Thylacinus cynocephalus, Greek for "dog-headed pouched one") was the largest known carnivorous marsupial of modern times. It is commonly known as the Tasmanian tiger (because of its striped back) or the Tasmanian wolf.[6] Native to continental Australia, Tasmania and New Guinea, it is thought to have become extinct in the 20th century. It was the last extant member of its family, Thylacinidae, although several related species have been found in the fossil record dating back to the early Miocene.

The thylacine had become extremely rare or extinct on the Australian mainland before European settlement of the continent, but it survived on the island of Tasmania along with several other endemic species, including the Tasmanian devil. Intensive hunting encouraged by bounties is generally blamed for its extinction, but other contributing factors may have been disease, the introduction of dogs, and human encroachment into its habitat. Despite its official classification as extinct, sightings are still reported, though none proven.

Like the tigers and wolves of the Northern Hemisphere, from which it obtained two of its common names, the thylacine was an apex predator. As a marsupial, it was not closely related to these placental mammals, but because of convergent evolution it displayed the same general form and adaptations. Its closest living relative is thought to be either the Tasmanian devil or numbat. The thylacine was one of only two marsupials to have a pouch in both sexes (the other being the water opossum). The male thylacine had a pouch that acted as a protective sheath, covering the male's external reproductive organs while he ran through thick brush. It has been described as a formidable predator because of its ability to survive and hunt prey in extremely sparsely populated areas.[7]

gotta hand it to you aussies, you've got some interesting critters
S&F

umm you do know uncyclopaedia is bogus?