Nosy exam question asks 3rd graders to reveal a "secret". Parents outraged.

I find this really disturbing too.
There are so many ways for things to be taken out of context, along with the childs 'perception' of the event/secret.

I just told my 11yo daughter about the question on the test ,& asked what her response would be in that situation.

Her response?
"Thats AWFUL!" I asked would she feel pressured to write something (A secret or make something up)
"Nope, its none of their business."
Lol, Ima proud momma!

not only do i agree this is utterly disgusting and poorly disguised for what it is ... but, i would suggest every youngster answer such silly questions with ... secret: my teacher touched me ... and see just how long such inquiries last.

My son´s teacher asked the kids to write down what they ate at home, the week before. My daughters class had to write a text about what parents do in their freetime. 3rd grade, too back then. we(as most parents) were outraged and demanded the papers from the school. We called the cultus ministry, they didn´t react

This is nothing, in the UK they are keeping a register of kids that use racist/homophobic/bigotry type language. Now it's obviously not that I'm in support of such language but my god they are kids! I use to call people "gaylords" and the like when I was at school! Now I'm 31 and I couldn't give a damn about what people do in the bedroom! When i was saying it I didn't give a damn about what people did in the bedroom! I used to make fun of boy's that liked girls too and vise versa! "john and emma sitting in a tree, K I S S I N G" and all that kind of thing! It was just what kids do! But to keep a record of them is insane!

Here is the article, scary!

They also teach "sex education" to nursery school kids! Can't we just let kids be damn kids and stop trying to control every little thing? Why should they have their heads filled with sex at such a young age?

This, amongst many other reasons, is why I choose to home educate!

What secrets does your family have?

Oh my dad downloads movies for us to watch...GRRR

Reminds me that I read sometime back about children being asked to report water wastage at home, such as leaving the tap running while brushing your teeth!

They're just preparing them to become the next Youth Hitler Movement...

reply to post by Honor93


Ha Ha genius! Could you imagine if they got a classroom full of kids saying this? Even better they could say the head master! lol... That made my day!

Maybe it's just me, but by the time I was supposed to be in third grade... I had a clear understanding of legal/illegal and what consequences may arise of telling school (or any adult, for that matter).

Perhaps I just knew that my loyalties were with kin and not kindergarten cop.

Originally posted by verschickter
My son´s teacher asked the kids to write down what they ate at home, the week before. My daughters class had to write a text about what parents do in their freetime. 3rd grade, too back then. we(as most parents) were outraged and demanded the papers from the school. We called the cultus ministry, they didn´t react

Wow, that's pretty well over the line.

If you want to keep it positive and consider maybe they weren't "fishing for information", maybe they wanted to let the kids who don't have healthy lifestyles or good family lives to see what those in their own community do to live better lives, but they're creating an invasion of privacy by doing it that way.
If you go on the philosophy that people are inherently good and aren't trying to dig up dirt or cause problems, you can see more than one side of it, but, in today's world and in the larger metropolitan areas, that's not always the case.
It would work fine in a tiny little town where everybody knows everybody else, but not so well in the city where there are a few thousand students instead of just a few hundred

children need to be taught never to discuss private family matters with non family members anyways,

It's a nosy question, completely out of line.
They have other ways to get secrets without outright asking. The fathers day cards they make seem to be more personalized than the mothers days. " List things your dad likes to do" and the child decorates his / her card with private , but usually embarrassing facts about him, some stuff you didn't want known comes out on the cards that are pasted up around the room for all to see.

They have your children 6 hours a day, 5 days a week to mold them into whatever they want.

Originally posted by FortAnthem
reply to post by Wrabbit2000

 

I don't want to turn my kids into tinfoil hat wearing nut-jobs like me either but, it seems the time has come when we will have to sit them down and talk to them about what it appropriate to tell their teachers about their home lives.

A teacher's job is to teach the kids, not to serve as an investigator digging for dirt against the parents. They certainly shouldn't be digging for dirt unless they have evidence that something is going on.

You can bet I'm going to teach my kids to say "None of your Goddamn business!" when their teachers ask them about things outside of school.

You are absolutely right.

However, allow me to point out one small error: this was a standardized test. Which means the teachers had no choice in giving the exam, nor did they come up with the question.

Sometimes I think standardized tests are DESIGNED to drive a wedge between the parents and teachers, who should have the same goal: a better educational experience for the child.

reply to post by smyleegrl


Well this is alluding to what I U2U'ed you the other day. I totally agree that the teachers didn't write it and that they possibly didn't even want to give it. But people ALWAYS have a choice. There will always be consequences too but if teachers spoke out a little more then maybe this type of situation wouldn't occur in the first place?

Originally posted by violet
children need to be taught never to discuss private family matters with non family members anyways,

It's a nosy question, completely out of line.
They have other ways to get secrets without outright asking. The fathers day cards they make seem to be more personalized than the mothers days. " List things your dad likes to do" and the child decorates his / her card with private , but usually embarrassing facts about him, some stuff you didn't want known comes out on the cards that are pasted up around the room for all to see.

They have your children 6 hours a day, 5 days a week to mold them into whatever they want.

The questions and examples given so far were pretty fishy and could be used in negative ways by the schools in question, but, overall, the schools really aren't some wild governmental experiment. They're the same schools that were there when you went to school. A lot of the same teachers who were there when you went to school and the newer ones are people you went to school with. It really isn't some giant conspiracy.
Granted, the larger metropolitan areas do have more problems because they have "too many chiefs and not enough indians" as the old saying goes as well as a lot more "turnover" and people moving in and out of their "district", but that's when parents need to step in and meet regularly with the schools or at least the teachers and actually contribute to the day to day activities instead of staying away and thinking it's a big conspiracy.
The first response is "I don't have time", but where our kids are concerned, we need to make time.

Come to think of it, when you get wild, strange stuff like this happening, the source is always a place with a LOT of "administrators" in the system or higher up people in the state department (of education) and basically just a bunch of people who don't really have much to do so they create stuff to do. It's THOSE people in education that sit up on their self-proclaimed pedastals and dictate how the rest of the world should behave.
Look back at the one-room schoolhouse. The teachers there were the teacher, the principal, the custodian, the secretary, EVERYTHING. They didn't have a central office with more people than the individual schools in their area to sit around and make up ideas all day and lose touch with actual people and children.
It's not just bigger government in general that we should start making changes in. People in their own communities can step up and get rid of all the cushy extra positions that just hog up funding and resources and take away from the kids.
The teachers don't speak up because that's the first group that the "evil overloards" come down on. They don't speak up because they don't want to come in to a hostile workplace everyday, they don't want to go on the job hunt again, they don't want to make their lives miserable. They also know that the second group in the line of things would be the children and most of the teachers are there to protect the children, to teach them, to nurture them, etc and they'd rather take the brunt themselves than have it inflicted on the kids.
If we want a smaller government, more privacy and a good education for our children, maybe it's time to make the "smaller government" campaign a grass roots campain and work from the bottom up. Step up and speak out about so many administrators, secretaries of this and secretaries of that and get rid of all the extra offices and put the majority of our public school funding exactly where it belongs, in the classroom.

reply to post by PurpleChiten


Charlotte Iserbyt would disagree with you. Have you seen this? Don't just jump to conclusions. Give her a chance first and hear her out if you haven't already...

Oh Btw I agree with you, not much has changed, but that isn't saying much...



Edit: Oh and also if the teachers do not have control over WHAT they teach, what does it matter if they are the same teachers there now? They are not the ones pulling the strings, are they?

reply to post by JibbyJedi

I went to Catholic schools, if it wasn't our parents beating us, it was our teachers when we acted up in class.

I went to Catholic school aswell, but my parents and teachers didn't beat me.
Maybe my parents were different.

Originally posted by Shadow Herder
How about the poor child who is molested nightly and if terrified to tell anyone or maybe sees nothing wrong with it and was told to keep a secret?. This good.

edit on 11-5-2012 by Shadow Herder because: (no reason given)

Our school had a program on what is" good and bad touching" for our children and well as "stranger danger" and a week long theme on drugs as well as bullying. As parents we had to give permission for our children to attend the courses; they listed out what they would be teaching during the courses. So I don't see how this standardized "fishing trip" is valid, other than for the state to put together a list of "suspects" . This also teaches children to break the bond of trust they shared with someone who may have shared a secret with them. Yes it may only have been I have web's inbetween my toes, but to some the sharing of that secret shows a bond of trust and not something they want to be shared with the world at large, and now the education state board is trying to teach children that it's ok to go breaking that trust .

I am 34 now, and I can tell you exactly what I would have done then. I was always loyal to family first and I am 100% positive I would have been super suspicious of such a question. I would have made something up on the spot that was very benign such as "My Mom told me not to tell my brother we are getting a dog".
I am not so sure that kids nowadays have that self-preservation sense anymore.
Very creepy, indeed.

Originally posted by Honor93
not only do i agree this is utterly disgusting and poorly disguised for what it is ... but, i would suggest every youngster answer such silly questions with ... secret: my teacher touched me ... and see just how long such inquiries last.

That is so NOT funny, but I laughed out loud!

reply to post by FortAnthem


Ironically as a child I was brought up to tell the truth, every time. And then into my young adult years I was advised by my parents maybe I should lie a little more.

Sorry to be off-topic a tad. Then again, no I'm not.

This reminds me when i was in 3rd grade...

I apparently asked a question about my younger brother breast feeding with my mom...

My parents had to go to all kind of psych evaluations and meetings for a while... my mom only just recently told me about that... All i had remembered from that incident was getting pulled into a 1 on 1 meeting with some school counselor or something asking about what i had said... Yeah, talking about my younger brother breast feeding... what the h? keep in mind, this was like 15-20 years ago too