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new sci fi idea

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posted on May, 11 2012 @ 02:36 PM
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this 'story' is no where near complete, i'd love to hear some input

in 2021, 4 years after a global revolution wipes out the collective 'powers that be', a new more violent and oppressive, yet scientific government has formed in the name of preventing future tyranny, established by Director Maddock Ardrara.

one such uses of the sciences was to hold government sanctioned projects where the 'real world' is a test facility within a mass of designed projects, all working in cohesion to give an illusion.
(think truman show except EVERYONE is the show in some form of test or another)

one of these projects, codenamed 'ValeraSyx' is a simulated rebel cause believed to be fighting to end the occupation of minds, a noble endeavour to cause change, but are under direct observation and study by the government's chief military Psychology scientist Dr. Cael Apquila. head of Labratory6 Installation; CodenameSyx which is tasked with studies of enemy military psychology by holding a live-subject simulation of a rebel cause within it's environment.

the ValeraSyx headed by Antawn Valera will eventually become aware they are test subjects where fate will intervene allowing them a very brief escape from the mind control they thought they were fighting to end and to see the truth and become able to cause the change they really felt. (or how I see it ending possibly)

Valera Syx (where the simulated rebel cause gets its name) was a female rebel Commander in the initial uprising who led a small force into one of the final battles of the war. Her determination was what inspired Director Ardrara to establish the ValeraSyx study among others to prevent her personality type from leading future insurrections.

so far this story is all over the place, how about some constructive critisicms?
I don't know anyone in my day to day life who could help.




posted on May, 11 2012 @ 03:52 PM
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reply to post by yourmaker
 


The theme fits well with the time. Well, perhaps the theme has recurred thru many, many ages? I don't know; nonethless, I can't think of a period in my life when such a motif has been quite so strong.

Sounds as though you have a good idea where you want to go with the story. I would go with that and start putting words to paper. Write, write, write! Get your first draft done, take a break, look at it, then polish. Repeat, recycle, & repeat again if necessary. Always smart to read a diversity of genres as well, which I presume you already do.

Good luck and don't quit! I want to read the full story one day



posted on May, 11 2012 @ 04:07 PM
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Originally posted by Kovenov
reply to post by yourmaker
 


The theme fits well with the time. Well, perhaps the theme has recurred thru many, many ages? I don't know; nonethless, I can't think of a period in my life when such a motif has been quite so strong.


I was influenced by Soviet era history for the governments theme, they had government sanctioned projects where they would randomly inject a priest or something crazy like that.

Valera syx the rebel organization theme is based loosely on Al-Qaeda and how they are more than likely influenced by international intelligence agencies, whom they learn terrorist tactics and such from their behaviour, which their motives are also influenced by.


Sounds as though you have a good idea where you want to go with the story. I would go with that and start putting words to paper. Write, write, write! Get your first draft done, take a break, look at it, then polish. Repeat, recycle, & repeat again if necessary. Always smart to read a diversity of genres as well, which I presume you already do.


thank you for some inspiration
, I usually never make it to draft because i'm just shooting semi-legit ideas out from the hip hoping something hits more or less, but with this idea I actually feel somewhat of a connection to it so that next step will certainly be undertaken.



 
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