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Enlightement.

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posted on May, 10 2012 @ 07:43 AM
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Just something I've kept with me and pondered for myself my whole life and thought I'd share...It will sound pretentious, that's why I never shared it lol, but this is what I experienced...When I was kid I lived in my " hometown " of Bonn, Germany...which isn't really my hometown since my mother is from Tunisia and my father from Bavaria, Germany. My father worked in Bonn. I was a little kid at the time and at age 3 we moved to Kairo-Egypt. That's where I have an almost complete loss of memory, cause in hindsight the move probably was kind of " traumatic ". A little later we moved to Djidda - Saudi Arabia and that's where longer fluent memories are accessible. Now...I was 5,6 at the time and just beginning school. Which was a German school with German teachers. Anyway...long story short...Due to the absolute absurdity of the circumstances: I couldn't understand a word anyone said when I joined my mother going shopping, although I looked like everybody around me...I couldn't read the signs on the door...everything seemed foreign to me...my mother could speak both German and Arab ( of course since it's her native language ) So all I'd see when going shopping with her and watching her speak with clerks etc. all I would see was: " Chramalachramachrama hahahaha! " Which made me feel like an Alien...completely detached from the world around me which is a lot to digest for a kid, since a kid has the psychological need to " merge " with it's immediate surroundings and soak it up in order to fulfill a role in society later on. I didn't know that at the time of course...All I knew was that I couldn't and that I had to be part of something. NOW...I yearned it. Plus...little tidbits like being told not to take anything in the supermarket cause they cut thieves hands off here and driving past a " beheading spot " kind of made me not really be part of the people around me anymore. And here comes the moment where it all made sense...When we drove to the beach. This was a remote beach somewhere in the middle of nowhere. And I mean nowhere...no human to be seen...flat desert as far as the eye could see and a flat ocean as far as the eye could see. My father would always put on gear and go fishing at the reef and since I wasn't aloud I'd wander off along the beach just checking things out and whatnot...as you do as a kid. Till some time ago I never made much of this experience, but I think something profound happened while I was walking along in the nothingness and my family disappeared somewhere over the horizon. This psychological need to merge with something and not really being able to with society made me kind merge with nature, the cosmos...whatever it was. I felt it...and it felt intuitively..." right ". I felt complete peace, happiness, comfort...and just...huge...I felt huge for some reason, but it wasn't me. I didn't exist. I felt like being a thousand tiny particles of something huge, vast, powerful, nondistinguishable, infinite, alive and yet pleasant and harmonious. Everything was one and I was part of it and not really of any substance. Me, the sand, the ocean, the sky, the stars...All one. I remember having to mostly look down on the ground a couple of meters infront of me cause I thought my " soul " or whatever was going to explode. But...I just knew, that giving my " being " over to " this " was right. Just right. Plus...we were in the middle of nowhere with our car and in the back of your head there's that little thought looming...if the car wouldn't work for some reason and my father, who's kind of your " hero " as a boy couldn't do anything about it all of us would die here. BUT the cosmos, or whatever " it " was ( that's how I thought of it ) wouldn't have anything to do with it. It would only be our own faults for driving out here. We would die in a couple of days and the waves would keep softly hitting the beach and the sun would keep shining, not even acknowledging our deaths. Nature could kill us without even trying, or being guilty of it and we wouldn't have the slightest control over our destiny no matter how hard me, my mother, or my father would try to change it, if the car broke down. That taught me a very important lesson early on in life. Human existence is extremely fragile thing to the point of non-existance. Which is a good thing...the " I " doesn't really exist. It's fluent. Ever since then...everything " human " felt somehow small, insignificant, not right, to downright ridicilous sometimes...I don't mean individuals...the whole thing...cities, countries etc. the constructs most people identify with, instead of the cosmos and it felt like I had to press this huge " being " of light or whatever into a small box...that energy has been burning inside ever since then...and I felt at most peace when I was alone. Socialising is great and all, but that experience tops anything...I got that locked up in a little chest deep inside of me and whenever I needed to feel at complete peace I'd open it up by going to the local swimming pool at night, where nobody was around and just do the backstroke looking at the stars. Now...to my own astonishment what I experienced for the couple of hours at the beach as a kid comes close to the " bhuddist enlightement ". Yeah...just always wanted to share this. Enlightement = the realization that we are one with the cosmos and nothing else. Not just one, but the cosmos is one with us and it's vast, massive, illusive, light and most of all alive.We are not in control.We are a tiny speck in this freefloating pulsating entity. But unfortunately you kind of have to feel it, experience it, to believe it.
edit on 10-5-2012 by dude69 because: (no reason given)




posted on May, 10 2012 @ 08:10 AM
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reply to post by dude69
 


Thanks for your story.
It is good to express these feelings though I know words are often inadequate to express the feeling
As a child I too had such a feeling - I promised myself never to forget that feeling of being at one with everything.
I thought everyone around me must feel the same - this glow of being.
Words are inadequate but I do know what you are saying



posted on May, 10 2012 @ 08:11 AM
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Originally posted by artistpoet
reply to post by dude69
 


Thanks for your story.
It is good to express these feelings though I know words are often inadequate to express the feeling
As a child I too had such a feeling - I promised myself never to forget that feeling of being at one with everything.
I thought everyone around me must feel the same - this glow of being.
Words are inadequate but I do know what you are saying






Yes...that's it...this glow of being...exactly.
edit on 10-5-2012 by dude69 because: (no reason given)



posted on May, 10 2012 @ 08:36 AM
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I've been through this feeling, you never really forget it.
To me, it was this overwhelming sensation of having just revealed me to myself. For what I really am. I suddenly became aware of my conscious "ego" that has been developed over the years...it was like viewing myself from a distance...painfully self-aware of my thoughts, emotions, and ideas and how I came to formulate them. You also become more attuned to other's emotions...you're way more empathetic.

You're suddenly aware of the "now" and not the past or the future. The blood rushing through your ears, the epic sight of the moon rising above the distant mountains...your senses sort of light up...you're very much alive and you know it.




edit on 10-5-2012 by Brad-H because: (no reason given)



posted on May, 10 2012 @ 08:46 AM
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Great story.
Just great, you described it so well, i lived it too in my mind, just imagining



posted on May, 10 2012 @ 08:56 AM
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reply to post by Brad-H
 


For me this " Now " was more like...I was aware of the past, the present and the future. It was all " one ". No lines. Just one pulsating stream of energy, just like the waves hitting the beach.

But...yeah...seeing yourself from a distance...like you're viewing yourself from a bird's view...yep, yep.
edit on 10-5-2012 by dude69 because: (no reason given)



posted on May, 10 2012 @ 09:20 AM
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reply to post by dude69
 


Very nice! You were merging with YOU. For so many of us on Earth right now, this is THE lifetime here. The lifetime of awakening to yourself, that's what you merged with ... your soul, higher self, whatever you want to call it. You are god also, and your soul wants to come in and join you in your reality, it doesn't care about running your life, it just wants to come in and express and experience!



posted on May, 10 2012 @ 09:22 AM
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Originally posted by Manula
Great story.
Just great, you described it so well, i lived it too in my mind, just imagining


Why thnx



posted on May, 10 2012 @ 09:34 AM
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reply to post by dude69
 


Thank you for sharing.
Enlightenment means to feel lighter and when you find yourself here and now the weight of the world disolves. Most people feel like aliens in an alien place, mainly because this place called 'the world' is not true. It is not that you are an alien, it is 'the world' that is alien. 'The world' does not exist how we have been taught, in fact 'the world' is no more than an idea.
Humans carry the weight of the world on their shoulders - in their head. The world is all imagination, really all there is for you is your present experience.
Just remember all there is, is this (whatever is happening presently).



posted on May, 10 2012 @ 09:45 AM
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Originally posted by Itisnowagain
reply to post by dude69
 


Thank you for sharing.
Enlightenment means to feel lighter and when you find yourself here and now the weight of the world disolves. Most people feel like aliens in an alien place, mainly because this place called 'the world' is not true. It is not that you are an alien, it is 'the world' that is alien. 'The world' does not exist how we have been taught, in fact 'the world' is no more than an idea.
Humans carry the weight of the world on their shoulders - in their head. The world is all imagination, really all there is for you is your present experience.
Just remember all there is, is this (whatever is happening presently).


Couldn't have said it better.



posted on May, 10 2012 @ 06:27 PM
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Hmm...must add something...the message...the soul explosion and looking at the ground part. This is what went down...as I was walking along the beach staring at the ground it felt, Im not bull#ting like " something " was looking at me. Not at me...but " through " me...and something said: " Let it go...just let it go " ...and it creeped me the hell out...until I just went, ok...here we go and * poof *, that's when everything I described kicked in...it felt like my soul was being inflated with love and something out there just said: " Hey...you found me...here...let me make your heart explode " lol...what I felt in that moment, with absolute certainty, was that there is something out there that is conscious, is watching THROUGH each and every one of us, IS all of us and exhudes unconditional love. and all you have to do is to receive it....kind of like a transmitter....this thing was at some point deep in space..the energy the sun gave off, was nothing compared to this. Until this day I feel it watching/being everything. I tried to draw what I felt...imagine a point and lots of streams of energy exhuding from it, kind of in the shape of the human arterial system, or tree branches and with connection-knots and you being one with those and pulsating in the form of waves and you being part of those waves. Sadly the human ego, which most people live for/within blocks exactly this, pulsating light, whatever and proceeds to make a complete mess of things.
edit on 10-5-2012 by dude69 because: (no reason given)



posted on May, 10 2012 @ 09:06 PM
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Originally posted by Manula
Great story.
Just great, you described it so well, i lived it too in my mind, just imagining


Hmm...did I miss the sarcasm?...probably huh?



posted on May, 11 2012 @ 09:03 AM
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Originally posted by dude69
Hmm...must add something...the message...the soul explosion and looking at the ground part. This is what went down...as I was walking along the beach staring at the ground it felt, Im not bull#ting like " something " was looking at me. Not at me...but " through " me...and something said: " Let it go...just let it go " ...and it creeped me the hell out...until I just went, ok...here we go and * poof *, that's when everything I described kicked in...it felt like my soul was being inflated with love and something out there just said: " Hey...you found me...here...let me make your heart explode " lol...what I felt in that moment, with absolute certainty, was that there is something out there that is conscious, is watching THROUGH each and every one of us, IS all of us and exhudes unconditional love. and all you have to do is to receive it....kind of like a transmitter....this thing was at some point deep in space..the energy the sun gave off, was nothing compared to this. Until this day I feel it watching/being everything. I tried to draw what I felt...imagine a point and lots of streams of energy exhuding from it, kind of in the shape of the human arterial system, or tree branches and with connection-knots and you being one with those and pulsating in the form of waves and you being part of those waves. Sadly the human ego, which most people live for/within blocks exactly this, pulsating light, whatever and proceeds to make a complete mess of things.
edit on 10-5-2012 by dude69 because: (no reason given)


I know of what you speak. Did you have an awakening where you had a glimpse or has it stayed? I had an awakening and i then fell back in the hole because i did not seek it and did not know what or why it had happened, i just knew it was unbelievable and delicious for about a year, glorious! I 'lost' it for a while and then found others it had happened to and also after a while had a name for it, do you know about 'non-duality'?

It is through letting go that something breaks, it is the mind that breaks. The mind is always telling us what the world is like and when it breaks we see the real for the first time, it is totally mind blowing. The relief is huge and i think that is why there is euphoria when it first happens because the weight of the world has gone completely. So light you float, so full of light you beam.
The mind wants to capture It, to define It, to draw It, to understand It, but It is prior to the mind, It sees and knows the mind - the mind will never grasp It. The mind is the false identity, the true identity is Awareness. There is an awareness of the mind, which is really one thought at a time, appearing always presently. Look to the place your next thought appears, the one looking is pure awareness.
edit on 11-5-2012 by Itisnowagain because: (no reason given)



posted on May, 11 2012 @ 09:26 AM
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reply to post by Itisnowagain
 


Exactly lol...You feel as if you are everywhere in time and space and nowhere at the same time...part of infinity and one moment at the same time...but you are more alive than you've ever been. Yes, yes,yes. Ultimate mindtrip.
edit on 11-5-2012 by dude69 because: (no reason given)



posted on May, 11 2012 @ 09:31 AM
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reply to post by dude69
 


This is a nice video that explores the experience of non dual (unconditioned) awareness.
youtu.be...
This is the true state of being, oneness.

edit on 11-5-2012 by Itisnowagain because: (no reason given)



posted on May, 11 2012 @ 11:18 AM
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reply to post by Itisnowagain
 


Exactement. Once again...can't really add much to that
....Oneness with the cosmic awareness = bliss
edit on 11-5-2012 by dude69 because: (no reason given)



posted on May, 12 2012 @ 02:01 AM
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You have to quit trying to " be " something, cause you already are everything.



posted on May, 12 2012 @ 02:43 AM
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Not just everything...everything, everywhere and always.



posted on May, 12 2012 @ 02:44 AM
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Which is kind of funny if you think about it...cause: everything=nothing=everything...the irony....somewhere out there some huge jellyfish of creation is just floating along with a constant crooked grin on it's face

I mean...we are on the verge of existence and non-existence all the time and the " secret " is to just accept that.

life=death=cosmos=harmony



posted on May, 12 2012 @ 04:44 AM
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reply to post by dude69
 


That constant crooked smile on the jelly fish is the smile on Mona Lisa face. The smile of knowing.
When you know that you are knowing, that smile appears from nowhere.
edit on 12-5-2012 by Itisnowagain because: (no reason given)



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