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Public Grade School Over-steps Bounderies

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posted on May, 5 2012 @ 03:51 PM
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Yesterday morning my girlfriend got a call from my step-daughters school. Stating that she needed to come pick up our 10 year old, because she was being kicked out for behavioral issues, for the day. When my girlfriend arrived at the school she noticed bruises on her arm and leg. She asked the the school psychologist where the bruises had come from because she didnt have them that morning before school. The psychologist replied "she did those to herself". The girlfriend then asked what was the issue and what the hell had gone on.

Here's where it gets good.

Apparently, that morning in class, the teacher was trying to get some kids to read a passage aloud in class. She had asked 6 other previous students to read aloud and got a "no" from all of them. She then asked my step-daughter to read aloud and she replied with a "no" as well. The teacher then told her that she needed to either read or get out of the class-room. To which she replied with a "no" as well. Now, she does a an extremely defiant character, there's no denying that. And Im not saying shes right in defying her teacher.

Anyway, the teacher called in the school psychologist to remove her from the class room and take her to a behavior room. She didnt want to go and was resisting. So the psychologist grabbed her by the underam and wrist and proceeded to drag her down the hall, then the stairs to the room. Leaving a hand shaped bruise on her arm and the side of her leg and knee are bruised.

The girlfriend was very unhappy with hearing this and asked to speak with the principal. She then told the girlfriend that she had done those to herself as well and there was nothing she could tell her. So, the girlfriend asked for a request form to move her to another school to which she was told she couldn't.

They left the school and went straight to the local police department and filed a report with them. She made the daughter tell the story to the officer, because she wasn't there. then told him what the school had told her about it.

After the officer gone to follow up with the school on the issue, we received a call from the school stating that she was going to be suspended until next Tuesday. Today, we received a letter in the mail from the school. it had stated that the "student" was taken to the behavior room and then proceeded to curse profanity and pinch and scratch herself. Neither of which she has never done before. She has her tantrums, but has NEVER screamed profanities nor scratch or pinch herself or even tried to hurt herself. The worst thing she screams is "I dont care" to whatever it is your saying to her. Thats just her shutting you out, but the behavior they described in the letter is nothing like her in anyway and a bold face lie. Not to mention he had no signs of any scratches or pinching anywhere on her.

Furthermore, the letter goes on to state again that she is suspended until Tuesday, May 8th. And, that she will not be allowed on the end-of-the-year field trip on the 10th. She will have to stay at the school with the principal.
We called the reporting officer and told him about the letter, and explained that she has NEVER exhibited that kind of behavior. And, that we didn't feel right in sending her back to that school since she was clearly being singled out now. He advised us that it would probably be best to contact the Superintendent Monday the 7th, and explain our situation and our choice to not send her back for the last 8 days of the year.

We have pictures of the bruises and have filed a report. This happened on Friday May 4th. We are waiting to see what happens on Monday to decide where to go. Any ideas of resources would be helpful.




posted on May, 5 2012 @ 03:59 PM
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There is SO much I can say here, but Im just kind of looking for opinions on what actions we should take. If your planing on telling me that "she deserved it", or "they did nothing wrong", well, then your not who Im looking to talk to here.

There have been a few incidents like this before involving other families, but nothing was reported and nothing was done. Just forgotten about, until yesterday, when I spoke to a few people and they had a few stories of their own.

I just feel that something has to be done, and if we dont stand up and say something, no one else will. And this school is going to be allowed to to continue thinking that they "own" our children. I cant just sit by and let that happen anymore. They messed with my kid this time, and thats enough for me. Action has to be taken, Im just not sure exactly what.



posted on May, 5 2012 @ 04:01 PM
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Hire an attorney and file a civil suit. While I abhor frivolous lawsuits, this kind of behavior from teachers and administrators should not be tolerated. I would also go to your local TV stations and find one who wants to cover it. Schools hate negative publicity. School districts have zero-tolerance policies on lots of things - so should you. I personally have a zero-tolerance policy on strangers manhandling my kid and leaving bruises, I don't know about you.

By the way, if a guy manhandles his wife and leaves bruises, he gets arrested for domestic battery. There should be criminal charges filed in this case. Do you think police would believe a guy if he told them his wife threw a tantrum and started pinching herself? Why would they believe that same fairy tale from the principal?



edit on 5-5-2012 by AwakeinNM because: (no reason given)



posted on May, 5 2012 @ 04:05 PM
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You should have taken her directly from the school to a lawyer--not the police. Whose side do you think the police will come down on? It may not yet be too late to bring in a lawyer. In any case, I wouldn't deal with the school by myself at this point--they've gone into CYA mode and will lie like 3-year-olds until Hell freezes over before they allow you any satisfaction....
edit on 5/5/2012 by Ex_CT2 because: (no reason given)



posted on May, 5 2012 @ 04:05 PM
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Nothing wrong with filing a police report, God knows schools call the cops on kids all the time.

The officer had good advice. She will probably be targeted by teachers after all the commotion, maybe consider private school, a charter school, or home school if you can't change her public school.



posted on May, 5 2012 @ 04:07 PM
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Originally posted by AwakeinNM
Hire an attorney and file a civil suit. While I abhor frivolous lawsuits, this kind of behavior from teachers and administrators should not be tolerated. I would also go to your local TV stations and find one who wants to cover it. Schools hate negative publicity. School districts have zero-tolerance policies on lots of things - so should you. I personally have a zero-tolerance policy on strangers manhandling my kid and leaving bruises, I don't know about you.
I agree, especially on the negative publicity part.

I think, from what you have told us of the story, that the administrators handled the situation entirely wrong. Which is not uncommon in schools (public & private), and for them to suspend her from school right after they got a visit from the police just seems to me like an administrator is taking things out on your daughter and her education.

I remember back when I was in High School the "Discipline Administrator" at the school fudged my attendance record so I would be booted from the school because I found out some "interesting things" about him. Him doing that pretty much threw a wrench into my future and instead of graduating with a regular diploma, I had to go to the "Adult Diploma Program" which is basically a glorified GED. So no, I wouldn't put it past a school administrator to make up stuff just to get back at someone...
edit on 5/5/2012 by ArrowsNV because: (no reason given)



posted on May, 5 2012 @ 04:08 PM
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I'd like to suggest something because I feel for what your going through. The schools have a real bad attitude about feeling they ARE the system and that makes their word the law, period. Doom on anyone who questions beyond the point they've been allowed to question....as they demonstrated in your case. Geeze.. That was totally out of line, what they did. You wouldn't obey and shut up, so your daughter is paying directly for it.


Okay, here is my suggestion. They no longer have the one we bought and use, but this is very similar to give you an idea.



Here are the important specs that make it viable.

- Supports up 1152 hours recording time
- Charging time: 3~4 hours
- Working time: 35 hours
- 1 x External microphone
Source

Our son's backpack proved plenty and picked up what we needed to hear. The external microphone makes it much easier to bury the recorder deep enough to be away from our Son as well. He was in 2nd grade when we used it the first time.

As you found...if it's your word against theirs, there is no dispute because we've lost before we ever drove into the parking lot as parents. Next time...if you can...record it and shove it back up their tailpipes so far they choke on it as they HAVE to give you whatever the situation demands at the moment. Just my suggestion from what we've used as one parent to another. My thoughts are with you and your daughter. I hope this works out better than it sounds.
edit on 5-5-2012 by Wrabbit2000 because: (no reason given)



posted on May, 5 2012 @ 04:08 PM
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reply to post by AwakeinNM
 


We have already decided that if nothing gets done after talking to the Superintendent or a meeting with the School Board, then yes we are contacting the local media and probably getting an attorney. Of course, we are hoping that it wont come to that and that they will resolve this to our satisfaction immediately. But, I'm really doubting that. For one, I don't feel that a school psychologist that leaves hand-print bruises on children or drags them downs halls and stairs, she be allowed around children. I also think they need to re-think their policy of calling the parents, BEFORE it gets out of hand.

I can promise you that had the hand-print bruise happened at home, our child would have been promptly taken from us. Now that it happened at a school they are going to act like it never happened at all.

To make it worse, they lied about it just like an abusive parent would saying "she did that to herself" when its an obvious adult had-print. Its just sickening and and very frustrating.



posted on May, 5 2012 @ 04:08 PM
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I don't know your financial situation to pursue it but I think that I would contact a lawyer for a consultation and see what legal action could be pursued. I would also see if there are any cameras in the school that may have caught some of the incident on film, especially the part that shows the psychiatrist dragging your daughter. I would try to get written statements from any parents that you have talked to that have had similar experiences that detail what took place. Schools get real jumpy when they think they may be facing a lawsuit and you may wind up exposing a terrible psychiatrist who should never have been around kids and get them fired.

And it should also be relatively easily with a hand print bruise to show that it wasn't your daughters by the simple size of it.

I hope you get to the bottom of this and the appropriate action is taking against the parties responsible.



posted on May, 5 2012 @ 04:23 PM
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Just a different perspective....

My son started kindergarten this year. He's been suspended eight times for violent behavior. It probably would have been more except I teach in the school.

My son NEVER acts that way at home, and we had no reports of behavior problems from his daycare. Hard to believe what was happening.

Then I witnessed his behavior myself and was appalled. He's now in therapy so hopefully we can figure out where this anger comes from and help him deal with it.

OP, a word of advice. Next time, if you find bruises, take your daughter to a doctor. They can narrow the time frame of the bruising based on color. Since it sometimes takes hours for a bruise to develop, this might stop any potential accusations that the bruising occurred before school.



posted on May, 5 2012 @ 04:43 PM
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Originally posted by JibbyJedi
Nothing wrong with filing a police report, God knows schools call the cops on kids all the time.

The officer had good advice. She will probably be targeted by teachers after all the commotion, maybe consider private school, a charter school, or home school if you can't change her public school.



Exactly what I was thinking..is home or charter school an option for you all? You would be surprised to find out that so many childhood behaviour problems stem from their classroom setting. Check it out!



posted on May, 5 2012 @ 04:54 PM
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Originally posted by bastet11

Originally posted by JibbyJedi
Nothing wrong with filing a police report, God knows schools call the cops on kids all the time.

The officer had good advice. She will probably be targeted by teachers after all the commotion, maybe consider private school, a charter school, or home school if you can't change her public school.



Exactly what I was thinking..is home or charter school an option for you all? You would be surprised to find out that so many childhood behaviour problems stem from their classroom setting. Check it out!


Charter schools can be a godsend. They can also be worthless just do your research on the school first and you should be fine.

One more thing. Try and find a child advocate. They can sometimes get more done than a lawyer.

As a teacher, if I can answer any questions you might have, just ask. It infuriates me that some teachers are such bullies. School should be a safe learning environment for all.

One more question, not an insult. Does she have any medical issues or diagnosis? Speech, ADHD, etc? If so you may have legal recourses.



posted on May, 5 2012 @ 05:56 PM
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reply to post by smyleegrl
 


She was suspected to have ODD (oppositional defiance disorder) about 2 years ago. And I'm not in any way condoning her behavior. But, I damn well am not condoning the way they handled it either. The bruise on her underarm is enough for me. As far as I'm concerned that's proof that they were excessive from the get.

Thanks for your input everyone. I will try to keep you posted as things develop. And i will probably post the pics of the bruises after i clear it with the lil one and the girlfriend.



posted on May, 5 2012 @ 06:08 PM
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Originally posted by Chickensalad
reply to post by smyleegrl
 


She was suspected to have ODD (oppositional defiance disorder) about 2 years ago. And I'm not in any way condoning her behavior. But, I damn well am not condoning the way they handled it either. The bruise on her underarm is enough for me. As far as I'm concerned that's proof that they were excessive from the get.

Thanks for your input everyone. I will try to keep you posted as things develop. And i will probably post the pics of the bruises after i clear it with the lil one and the girlfriend.



Does she have an IEP? Usually children who are diagnosed
with ODD have an IEP.

The reason I ask is because the IEP is a legal document and as parents you have the right to insist on an IEP placement meeting. At that meeting you can have it written into her plan exactly what steps the teacher and school must follow when she has a "spell.".



posted on May, 5 2012 @ 06:47 PM
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reply to post by smyleegrl
 


I dont believe so. Im not sure if she was actually diagnosed, or if it was just a suggested reason for her behavior. What would constitute a legal diagnosis? She doesnt take any medication, we just have to deal with her a little bit different than the other children. Theres no room for losing your cool with her, you have to maintain rationale and keep your calm, and not argue with her points. Then she eventually calms down and usually apologizes without hesitation.



posted on May, 5 2012 @ 07:01 PM
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If this kind of crap keeps up I for see teachers and school staff being targeted. They forget they have to go home some time and they may be a day coming that they do not make it home. I do not have any kids and never will but I can see where this is going. It is sad to say it but it is going to take a teacher getting murdered for attacking some ones kids before they even think about changing the way they do thing.



posted on May, 5 2012 @ 07:18 PM
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reply to post by fixer1967
 


Well, lets hope that doesn't happen. And honestly i dont think it has to happen that way. Like i mentioned before, other people have had similar incidents with this school. Nobody did anything about it though, or even spoke up. If we can get more people to speak up, instead of being scared, then they may take notice of all the unhappy parents. It took unhappy parents to get us to this point. But, eventually people stopped gettting involved in public schools and they started doing as they see fit. Its time people get involved again. WE have to make the change. Violence is at the very bottom of the list, if even there at all.



posted on May, 5 2012 @ 07:28 PM
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reply to post by Chickensalad
 


Violence seems to be the only way a lot of the times and that is sad. But I do not know which is most sad, me being right or you being right.



posted on May, 5 2012 @ 08:38 PM
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I would never send her back. I have my son home, and will be homeschooling him next year, not for being suspended, but because he has a strong anxiety against school and hides in the bathroom or runs home, and it was OK for a while, until he was sick so much, and then the spring break, but then nothing worked from rewards to withdrawal of privileges. And I don't intend to traumatize him with this any longer, its not working, he is himself, not the average kid, so I'm going to find a way to work with him, I don't believe in hammering round pegs in square wholes.

They can't make me send him to school, and he's going to be home schooled.

However if for some reason she is sent to spend the day with the principal who would be bullying and threatening her, then I would have the whole thing taped, but I know if it was me, when I was a child, I wouldn't have gone in, I would have hid too if I was feeling nervous about anything like that. Her feeling have to be taken into account, children are not adults, and don't have the same level of skills and are much more sensitive.
edit on 5-5-2012 by Unity_99 because: (no reason given)



posted on May, 6 2012 @ 01:09 AM
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reply to post by Unity_99
 


I agree fully. I wouldnt want to be there anymore either if I were her. And Im not going to force her to be either. There are only 8 days left of the school year, and shes only been absent 2 days this year, so I dont really for-see a truancy issue.

I've already decided that they are all going to a private school this next year. I wish I could home-school them but I just dont have the resources for it.



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