Would anyone help your child in this situation?

I'm not certain, but this seems a little unfair. What happens if you kick the guy's ass, take the child away from him, and then YOU are charged with attempted kidnapping when it turns out he actually is the father? I've seen children beat their parents, spit on them, call them all sorts of names, and run away from them. How are we to determine who is who in such a situation?

I don't think the blame should be placed entirely on onlookers here. Police have convinced most "regular" citizens that they should not protect themselves or anyone else for that matter, because they, the police, are best trained to take care of the situation. Its ridiculous to rely on the police for protection, of course, but most people don't take that stance. "Someone else will take care of it" is the defining motto of the past 2 or 3 generations. Kind of hard to change that.

Originally posted by CX
I used to work at a school looking after kids that had, without going into too much detail, a not so good life up till then. These kids were violent at times though and we had a set restraint policy and system we employed for these occasions if needed.

Many times i have been in a public place, holding a kid.....with the kid shouting out all kinds of stuff to get the public to attack me, claims of rape, abduction and the likes....and oddly enough we never had anyone approach us either. Whilst it was handy that we weren't pestered by anyone whilst we were trying to keep the child safe, it was also very worrying that nobody even bothered to at least question why we were holding a kid that was protesting.

I would most definately have done something, i don't care if it's a misunderstanding. I feel the same about those people who have claimed they have seen adults with a girl that looked exactly like the missing girl Madaleine McCann. Why the hell don't they approach the adult and stop them?

If i were to see a kid i was 100% sure was abducted, i would stop the "parent" and create merry hell until the cops came and cleared it up. With missing Maddy the eye disorder is a big giveaway. I don't think any genuine parent would mind you at least enquiring and taking a closer look.

CX.

CX
I don't think any good parent would mind either if a person was to enquirer and take a closer look ..I'm like you i couldn't just walk away even if it was just a misunderstanding ..And even if they did get mad id still feel better i at least took the time to see what was going on..peace,sugarcookie1

Originally posted by Unity_99
"Do you need help? Is everything all right?"

That was it, and by the time I ran out the door, they were walking off body language turned in towards each other, obviously a lovers spat.

Therein is the problem. I've "intervened" twice in my life where it turned out the woman WAS being assaulted by her significant other. Both times I wound up in serious physical peril from the man. In the one instance a woman who was in her nightgown in my yard screaming "call the cops, call the cops, he's beating me up" had completely changed her story by the time the police did show up.

And there were several times where I attempted to intervene where I was wrong; same results more or less.

I'm older and less crazy now, don't know what I'd do, especially with a kid and a parent. You see kids being borderline abused in public all the time--it's a tough call. Most of the time no one does anything

Originally posted by facelift
reply to post by sugarcookie1

 

lol

Love it...not one white person stopped, yet the two that DID do something probably have been racially profiled most of their lives.


Good on 'em...


As to the rest...you suck.

This may have even been rigged that way, you know, given the climate and agenda.

But, if not, I have a theory because I was helped quite a few times by those who were pretty rough and tumble, under the table type guys. A certain street honor. But then I had had a tendency to help my ex's friends and those in need too.

By the way, I'm not suggesting those 2 young men were, they could have been youth counselors for all I know, outreach program, they could be anyone really, they certainly didn't have the rough and tumble look that the ones who jumped in fast to help me, even one who took the beating of his life and ended in hospital with stitches in his neck to help me from being assaulted.

So, I found in my life that grass roots people, even very grass roots, can be more hero's than average middle class and higher.

Hands down, one time, every time, I would rather look like an idiot who made to much of something, then be the person who saw something and did nothing, and a child or adult was harmed.

Years ago, I was in need of assistance, and no one helped, and thankfully I was able to get away, since then, I have made it my business to be vigilant, especially for those who cannot speak up for themselves. No I wouldn't consider myself a detective, but just knowing the color of car, clothing of the child, or even the first number of a license plate, can in fact make a hell of a difference.

The fact that thousands of children are abducted every year, women are abused outdoors, and kids are bullied on street corners, is an alarm loud enough for me to care.

S&F,

Peace, NRE.

Originally posted by sugarcookie1

I don't think any good parent would mind either if a person was to enquirer and take a closer look ..

And once again the key term here is "good parent."

There are horrible interactions in public between child and adult all the time; most of the time it's not abduction and much of the time the parents don't necessarily seem open to rational enquiry.

reply to post by DelMarvel


I know its a tough call. What I would do in the situation if they hadn't walked off is yell louder than she did and get my ex up and out, the neighbors up and out, and phone calls made and more or less keep engaging the conversation, wouldn't be physically up to tackling, but create a disturbance to hold everyone there, to stop a possible abduction. Then she could change her tune all she wanted but, there would be these people around as witnesses.

Originally posted by Unity_99
reply to post by Maxatoria

 

Some of us do not carry makeup and digging for a pen in the bottom of a big bag, would not be worth the time, but actually asking if the person is alright and needs help is a good idea and then if so, joining in the yelling for help and for someone to call 9/11, and doing what one can, talk the guy down if possible, react if needed.

Unity
I agree with what your saying..You should see my purse its crammed full you could play lets make a deal with what i carry ..The advise your giving is good ..thanks..peace,sugarcookie1

Originally posted by NoRegretsEver
Hands down, one time, every time, I would rather look like an idiot who made to much of something, then be the person who saw something and did nothing, and a child or adult was harmed.

Years ago, I was in need of assistance, and no one helped, and thankfully I was able to get away, since then, I have made it my business to be vigilant, especially for those who cannot speak up for themselves. No I wouldn't consider myself a detective, but just knowing the color of car, clothing of the child, or even the first number of a license plate, can in fact make a hell of a difference.

The fact that thousands of children are abducted every year, women are abused outdoors, and kids are bullied on street corners, is an alarm loud enough for me to care.

S&F,

NoRegretsEver
What a great post thank you! And your right the key word is vigilant ..There is so much abuse going on in this world its disturbing..Look whats going on in some nursing homes old folks getting beat and starved i just read an article about this in my local news just makes me sick! peace,sugarcookie1

Peace, NRE.

Originally posted by DelMarvel

Originally posted by sugarcookie1

I don't think any good parent would mind either if a person was to enquirer and take a closer look ..

And once again the key term here is "good parent."

There are horrible interactions in public between child and adult all the time; most of the time it's not abduction and much of the time the parents don't necessarily seem open to rational enquiry.

DelMarvel
I understand that also..I was in a local store the other day and this lady was just screaming at her kid he was maybe 5 but she was yanking him around by his arm also..
I went up to her and asked her to stop she told me to mind my own business but at least she stopped ..I felt for that poor child

I'm six an a half foot tall and I MOST DEFINATELY would have been in that persons face demanding proof of who he was, sod the law. Would I get charged if I was wrong? dont care as I believe any court would understand why I'd done it.

Dont like these fake child abduction things, stinks of trying to scare people into chipping their kids.

Just spotted someones comment about parents. My daughter was shopping with her 3 year old, a lady stopped her and said
"I just wanted to say what a good mother you are, sometimes I go home in tears when I see how people treat their children"
My daughter said she had to leave the shop before SHE started crying

Originally posted by OrchusGhule
I'm not certain, but this seems a little unfair. What happens if you kick the guy's ass, take the child away from him, and then YOU are charged with attempted kidnapping when it turns out he actually is the father? I've seen children beat their parents, spit on them, call them all sorts of names, and run away from them. How are we to determine who is who in such a situation?

I don't think the blame should be placed entirely on onlookers here. Police have convinced most "regular" citizens that they should not protect themselves or anyone else for that matter, because they, the police, are best trained to take care of the situation. Its ridiculous to rely on the police for protection, of course, but most people don't take that stance. "Someone else will take care of it" is the defining motto of the past 2 or 3 generations. Kind of hard to change that.

OrchusGhule
You raised a good point..The tables could turn and your the attempted kidnapper ..Probably why the police should be called instead of trying to intervene.."Someone else will take care of it" Ive seen that thought by many its a hard call sometimes..peace,sugarcookie1

Originally posted by VoidHawk
I'm six an a half foot tall and I MOST DEFINATELY would have been in that persons face demanding proof of who he was, sod the law. Would I get charged if I was wrong? dont care as I believe any court would understand why I'd done it.

Dont like these fake child abduction things, stinks of trying to scare people into chipping their kids.

Just spotted someones comment about parents. My daughter was shopping with her 3 year old, a lady stopped her and said
"I just wanted to say what a good mother you are, sometimes I go home in tears when I see how people treat their children"
My daughter said she had to leave the shop before SHE started crying

edit on 3-5-2012 by VoidHawk because: (no reason given)

VoidHawk
Point is were not all 6 feet tall..I'm a very tiny person and barely weight 100 pounds wouldn't take anything for me to get hurt but id still stand up to what i felt was wrong but just do it in a very different fashion like call the police or make a fuss so others step in also..peace,sugarcookie1

Sugarcookie

I applaud your post. This is indeed an interesting topic. I am a father of twin children, and for security purposes, I will not reveal their ages or gender.

I will tell you that based on THIS video, the little girl screaming, "You are not my dad" can be taken two different ways. The man with the girl could in fact be a step father, and the child is being defiant, and second, he could be an abductor.

I am ALWAYS the one who jumps into a situation, and my wife however tries to keep me from "getting involved." Though I always do, and I find myself either being a hero, or accused of being a nutcase.

Either way, I would rather be considered a nutcase and get involved, not matter what.

I think the topic is VERY situational. Where, when, and the surroundings surly have a lot of play here. It would also depend to a degree as to what MY situation is at that moment -- do I have my family with me, my wife, my kids? Then how do I react? Obviously, if I am alone, I am "IN", but it doesnt shame me to say that if I have my family with me, I have to take into account their protection from the situation too.

For example, doest he man int his case have a concealed weapon that could be fired and injure my family?

So I dont think it is a cut and dry, YES OR NO, answer. There are many variables that need to be considered, in a very swift thought, in a short period of time. NOT ALL PEOPLE can perform this way.

I know, however, that from previous experiences, that I am ABLE to make quick decisions on the spot.

So chances are, my adrenaline would kick in, and I would go into hero mode.

Originally posted by sugarcookie1

Originally posted by VoidHawk
I'm six an a half foot tall and I MOST DEFINATELY would have been in that persons face demanding proof of who he was, sod the law. Would I get charged if I was wrong? dont care as I believe any court would understand why I'd done it.

Dont like these fake child abduction things, stinks of trying to scare people into chipping their kids.

Just spotted someones comment about parents. My daughter was shopping with her 3 year old, a lady stopped her and said
"I just wanted to say what a good mother you are, sometimes I go home in tears when I see how people treat their children"
My daughter said she had to leave the shop before SHE started crying

edit on 3-5-2012 by VoidHawk because: (no reason given)

VoidHawk
Point is were not all 6 feet tall..I'm a very tiny person and barely weight 100 pounds wouldn't take anything for me to get hurt but id still stand up to what i felt was wrong but just do it in a very different fashion like call the police or make a fuss so others step in also..peace,sugarcookie1

Sorry, didnt make myself clear. That was the point I as going to make but got sidetracked. I was merely pointing out what I would have done, because I could.
I know not everyone could but it reminded me of a case in the uk where a child was killed in a street by a dog and not one person tried to stop it. When you have something happen in a main street there are plenty of people able to do something but they dont.

In cases like your op if people are not physicaly able to interfere they could at least shout from afar while calling the police.

I think alot more people would stop & help if the child were yelling "A stranger is trying to take me, Call the police".
Teaching them to say 'Help, you're not my dad', can be too easily confused with a child being rebellious.

Truth is, I probably would'nt have intervened with the original wording, but I would in a heartbeat upon hearing "A stranger is trying to take me,call the police".

Originally posted by VoidHawk

Originally posted by sugarcookie1

Originally posted by VoidHawk
I'm six an a half foot tall and I MOST DEFINATELY would have been in that persons face demanding proof of who he was, sod the law. Would I get charged if I was wrong? dont care as I believe any court would understand why I'd done it.

Dont like these fake child abduction things, stinks of trying to scare people into chipping their kids.

Just spotted someones comment about parents. My daughter was shopping with her 3 year old, a lady stopped her and said
"I just wanted to say what a good mother you are, sometimes I go home in tears when I see how people treat their children"
My daughter said she had to leave the shop before SHE started crying

edit on 3-5-2012 by VoidHawk because: (no reason given)

VoidHawk
Point is were not all 6 feet tall..I'm a very tiny person and barely weight 100 pounds wouldn't take anything for me to get hurt but id still stand up to what i felt was wrong but just do it in a very different fashion like call the police or make a fuss so others step in also..peace,sugarcookie1

Sorry, didnt make myself clear. That was the point I as going to make but got sidetracked. I was merely pointing out what I would have done, because I could.
I know not everyone could but it reminded me of a case in the uk where a child was killed in a street by a dog and not one person tried to stop it. When you have something happen in a main street there are plenty of people able to do something but they dont.

In cases like your op if people are not physicaly able to interfere they could at least shout from afar while calling the police.

Thanks for clearing that up Thats horrible a child being killed in a street by a dog and no one even helped that really makes me ill! thanks for posting,peace,sugarcookie1

Originally posted by jewells
I think alot more people would stop & help if the child were yelling "A stranger is trying to take me, Call the police".
Teaching them to say 'Help, you're not my dad', can be too easily confused with a child being rebellious.

Truth is, I probably would'nt have intervened with the original wording, but I would in a heartbeat upon hearing "A stranger is trying to take me,call the police".

jewells
Maybe parents should teach there kids to say A stranger is trying to take me, Call the police".
But its hard to say what a kid is thinking when there panicking ..sugarcookie1

Im off to get a few things done i will check in later

reply to post by jewells


A smaller child or anyone in immediate danger may not be able to say all that. HELP. I DON'T KNOW YOU. And PHONE THE POLICE, should suffice.

Or HELP! STRANGER!