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What are you going to Wipe you butt with??

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posted on May, 3 2012 @ 08:00 AM
reply to post by Alchemst7

All of those dogs you think are wiping their butts have a worm infestation.

So, what will our humans use when they get worms?

There is a great deal to think about. How will you sew skin together?


posted on May, 3 2012 @ 12:05 PM
I'm just going to pray for a clean break everytime. If it doesn't work out, Ill go for a swim.

posted on May, 3 2012 @ 12:17 PM
reply to post by MNnativeamer

I pray for that every time I go backpacking for more than a day.


posted on May, 3 2012 @ 01:01 PM
Read something on here years ago (at least I think it was on here) about the versatility of various types of gourds and gourd husks.

Amoung many uses for them, "self cleaning" was listed.

posted on May, 3 2012 @ 01:11 PM
reply to post by MNnativeamer

one word: dingleberries

edit on 3-5-2012 by Alchemst7 because: (no reason given)

posted on May, 3 2012 @ 01:41 PM
You could always use the Richard Gere method and use small, furry woodland creatures, even though he kinda does it wrong.

Sorry to propagate that awful rumor, but I couldn't resist.

edit on 3-5-2012 by AwakeinNM because: (no reason given)

posted on May, 3 2012 @ 02:09 PM
Hopefully when the balloon goes up I'll be wiping mine with politicians, bankers and lawyers. Proving once again that despite rumors to the contrary, they are good for something.

posted on May, 3 2012 @ 02:24 PM
I don't actually have an answer to the question, but found an interesting video describing the problem itself. In song, no less. Very musical.

posted on May, 3 2012 @ 02:33 PM
I got in trouble the last time I posted this.

Let a dog lick it clean. They're not called ****eaters for nothing, you know.

posted on May, 3 2012 @ 02:40 PM
I've noticed a lot of my friends use way too much tp all the time. I'm not saying only use 1 square, but it would be a good idea IMO to start practicing using less now. Even if TS doesn't HTF at least you've become less wasteful.

I'll never forget my first year living on my own with no assistance from anyone. I had a full time job, was going to college full time and things seemed great at first in my own apartment. Then one day I was grocery shopping and was super low on funds after paying all my bills for the month. I had to make a choice between what I wanted vs. What I needed... Like tp. That may seem silly, but for a girl who had lived her entire life in a fairly sheltered upper-middle class family, I had never really thought about all the little necessities that add up when you're footing the bill yourself. I learned quickly that there was no way I'd be able to maintain the "quality of life" I had grown accustomed to living with my parents... And that the little things I took advantage of don't just fall from the sky...

Anyway, around Christmas my grandfather was asking me what I was learning being out on my own, and I told him, somewhat sarcastically, that tp doesn't fall from the sky. He laughed long and hard. On Christmas eve, I found a huge gift with my name on it under the tree with a note on it that read,"This fell out of the sky just for you!" It was a case of tp from Costco. My grandpa got a huge kick out of it, and so did I.

I'm sorry to the OP if I digressed with my story. It might seem kinda dumb to others, but my grandpa was the only person who ever treated me with the utmost respect and taught me more than anyone else in my life. He was the most kind and wisest man I've ever known. It's been almost a year since he's been gone after his 3rd battle with cancer. I miss him terribly, but I enjoy sharing stories about him so maybe others can enjoy a lil part of him too.

posted on May, 3 2012 @ 02:43 PM
Seriously. Spagnum moss. Had to use it a few times in the hills and it's not only effective but environmentally friendly. I understand it was used quite a bit in the old days. It can also be used to dress wounds.

posted on May, 3 2012 @ 02:54 PM

Originally posted by jefwane
I don't know why so many people would have lied to me about this through my life, but I've heard from multiple older folks both white and black that rural and farming folks would use old dried out cobs from corn. Never had the need to try it but thought about it and it would be better than leaves or something you gotta wash. Nothing beats toilet paper though, and I imagine would be a very tradeable commodity in a TSHTF scenario.

You are right they did use corn cobs.!! I know..because my grand parents used them ( and news papers) in their out house until I was 13. had to soften the cobs and what you did was use an old hair brush ...then brush lightly on the cobs to soften them. Done my share of soften the corn cobs for the bucket in the out house.

posted on May, 3 2012 @ 03:14 PM

Originally posted by Lil Drummerboy
So, I thought id ask,, do you have enough TP???
I mean,, it is a concern.. what will you use?
will you have enough? if you run out, whats the option...
here is an alternative,.. Lambs ear

i was considering my mother in law
until i realized i'm single

guess i'll have to reserve a finger for that job?

posted on May, 3 2012 @ 03:18 PM
That's what your left had is for.

Look to any third world country.

That's why many cultures consider it an afront if you offer your left had to them or for that matter if you touch them with your left hand.

posted on May, 3 2012 @ 03:24 PM
reply to post by snowspirit

Just be very careful! We owned a very large ranch and my father-in-law did not like to "Mess up the mountain" No tissues of any kind on a cattle drive. Leaves worked better....Until he grabbed the poison oak by mistake. Stood in the trailer with the horses all the way home and ate standing for a week or so.

posted on May, 3 2012 @ 03:48 PM
Here's another alternative -
get a dog.

posted on May, 3 2012 @ 04:11 PM
another vote for dog? seriously?
I'm gonna have to look that one up... Do man and his best friend have the best kept secret too?

But really this thread has me thinking of all the alternatives to TP indeed!

Like the girl above with the cute story noted, tp aint free....

I think I'll be throwing a sears catalog or something in the john from today forward to see if i can't wipe a few bucks off my paper bill HAH

posted on May, 3 2012 @ 04:30 PM
dont know if anyone has said this.... phone books. I have way to many of them.

posted on May, 3 2012 @ 05:50 PM

Originally posted by timetothink
reply to post by dreamingawake

Please don't tell me they shared it?

Left one hanging on a string.

I was going say.......someone else's left hand is one of those things I usually hoard...I would rather have that than food.

Looks like they did share it probably not with every crapper but a lot I guess. Since was intended for re use. Gross and spreads disease of course. I'd assume there was a scraper or location to attempt to cleanse it, maybe bucket? Or unless they had less disease of that nature the they were unconcerned about getting sick, so they would wipe them. Haha I don't suggest reuse.

posted on May, 3 2012 @ 08:52 PM
I read an article about a woman that once used poison oak as a wiper..
things swelled up to the point of her only being able to produce "Twizzlers"
for excrement..
I couldnt even imagine

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