Originally posted by Mapkar
reply to post by Stormdancer777
It could be that or it could be cognitive dissonance. Consider for a moment the conversation the OP mentions. If the outcome was not as expected, or there was a conflict in the OP's mind about some aspect of the situation, it could cause cognitive dissonance.
For those who don't know what this is like, it's similar to the feeling of wondering if you've left your car windows open, or if you've left a wallet or keys somewhere unusual. It's also the same feeling that comes from rejection, it's the feeling most commonly from a denied date, a denied job application, or even a reprimand of some type. Cognitive dissonance may result in a foggy, drained feeling and that's possibly what is going on here.
Let's begin our discussion by looking at what really happens when two humans interact. There is an old mystical saying that where attention goes, energy flows. Thus, when two people turn their attention to one another, they literally merge energy fields, pooling their energy. The issue quickly becomes: Who is going to control this accumulated energy? If one can dominate, managing to get the other to defer to his point of view, to look at the world in his way, through his eyes, then this individual has captured both energies as his own. He feels an immediate rush of power, security, self worth, even euphoria.
But those positive feelings are won at the other person's expense, for the dominated individual feels off center, anxious, and drained of energy.1 All of us have felt this way at one time or another. When we are forced to defer to someone who has manipulated us into confusion, thrown us off balance, shown us up, we suddenly feel deflated. And our natural tendency is to try to win energy back from the dominator, usually by any means necessary.
This process of psychological domination can be observed everywhere, and it is the underlying source of all irrational conflict in the human world, from the level of individuals and families all the way to cultures and nations. If we look realistically at society, therefore, we see it is an energy-competitive world, with people manipulating other people in very ingenious (and usually quite unconscious) ways. In light of the new understanding of the universe, we can also see that most of the manipulations used in this regard, most of the games people play, are the result of basic life assumptions. In other words, they form the individual's field of intention.
When we move into interaction with another human being, we must keep all this in mind. Every person is an energy field consisting of a set of assumptions and beliefs that radiate outward and influence the world. This includes beliefs about what an individual thinks other people are like, and how to win in conversation.
Everyone has a unique set of assumptions and style of interaction in this regard, which I have called control dramas. I believe that these "dramas" fall along a continuum ranging from very passive to very aggressive.
Originally posted by MegaSpace
people manipulating other people in very ingenious (and usually quite unconscious) ways. . . .
"dramas" fall along a continuum ranging from very passive to very aggressive.
It's a good read this book.
Originally posted by Matteus
What does it mean when you feel sucked your energy and tired after speaking to someone ?
What does it mean about that person, his/her intention ?
Thanks everyone.edit on 27-4-2012 by Matteus because: (no reason given)