What exactly is devil worshipping ?

reply to post by MountainLaurel


Is that the devils work at play? i dont really know the answer there. I do know this much we have choice in life. I choose to feel something for a woman who may not even know im alive. I choose strength because weakness is not an option. I choose living because every breathe we take we come one closer to one less. I choose your advice because for a blonde you really arnt that dumb at all. So, Blonde straigtened that typing hand up, sharpen that grey i need my navigator now more than ever. You see Mountain Laurel i play to win there is no other way.

And if there is devil work at play just blame me for now. I have worn the devils shoe in the past have found it fits me well. Although, of recent i have questioned my own behaviour and have started to correct some actions i took previously, and trying to regulate my behaviour. I contacted an ex girl friend last night after our chat and apologied for treating her like crap. Shes an attractive Blonde as well, shes a career successful lawyer and mediator so its amazing she put up with my neandathal self absorbed crap. There are other like as well, that go back over the years. unfortunately i cant apologies to them all because i threw their numbers away after i guess is using them an extreme term. Mabey im being too harsh on myself tonight.

So as you see im no angel.My improvement in behaviour has been this year. You are my alter conscience and have helped me already to mend one past wrong. I guess my bad ass originated from how i brought up, went to a school where getting crap kicked out of me was the normal, had a dad who kinda blamed me for never being the son he wanted, a career that was kinda harsh and unforgiving. I guess i eventually became a badass because i could see no other possibilities. I mean i even had an affair with best friends wife and a string of other married woman. At the time i didnt care but later on i had regrets. We all live with our demons now they do come back and haunt us but we must move on. Lol as you can see im quite talkative tonight and the new week has just started.

I feel this is going to be a great week i just feel its vibe or mabey thats coming from the house not far from me. There is this real trippy house that just got built, its double story and its wiccan and looks like its right outta of a halloween movies. Its very weird because never seen anyone there during the day and the things been there over six months. Then theres the windows on top story are kinda facing view so they can see right into my back yard which is unsually since i only have one neighbour on the opposite side. Then at night i swear i can hear this sound like a siren calling or something, and a light or a glow comming from room of the house. Lol there you go a scary spooky story to bemuse you.

reply to post by AthlonSavage


LOL...step away from the spooky "evil house even if it is "calling" you......resisting temptation is not always easy......God knows this is true.....

I always found the term " Sex, drugs and rock n roll", lol, and I would add booze too, to be interesting....None of those things are bad or "evil" if not taken to extremes...and that is where it gets "tricky"....because human nature does take things to extremes....and I guess part of our journey toward "good" is to learn self control, and that our actions do effect others.

I think it is very nice you called your ex and told her you were sorry....and again our stories are in "tune"....my first love called me up about a mn ago, I had not heard his voice in at least 15 years...although we do say hello on FB from time to time....anyways......when we were in high school I got pregnant.....I wanted to keep the baby and get married, he did NOT....I was going to be going off to college , he was very serious about his band and music career....and he was probably right, we were too young....but he knew it killed me, and to this day that is the most "evil" thing I have ever done, getting an abortion.

It meant the world to me that after all this time he cared about how I am doing....and the fact is, it was both our faults...we were both reckless kids, that had unprotected sex...and really I couldn't have asked for a better first lover but just talking to him, and clearing our hearts of past sins, was really wonderful...I hope talking to your ex was just as wonderful......

reply to post by AthlonSavage


I decided to start a new page to discuss the whole "womanizing" issue.....I respect that you are reflecting on your past, and that you feel remorse for hurting others. This issue is near and dear to my heart, and probably the biggest reason things did not work out with my ex.

I think it is perfectly fine for single adults to have active sex lives as long as all players are honest, but.. if having sex with someone would break another person's heart if they found out, it's all bad, and will lead to nothing but misery for all concerned. The problem I think is that people get greedy...they want the love, comfort and security of a partner and a home....but also the "thrill" of variety...and that could lead into many other conversations. Lying and cheating shows a lack of respect, mostly to yourself....because you have sacrafised your integrity.

OK, lol...I will get off my soapbox....and I have made my share of mistakes...but I had some thoughts you may want to consider....my guess is your in your 30's to 40's.....you have a young, playful, romantic soul, that's why you become infactuated with women, and them with you....yet you yearn for your "soul mate"....to complete your heart....and you know that means a change, a "shift" in your behavior and thinking...and I think your working that out right now..

Now...you and Laura could end up to be an epic Love story....and that would be great ! Anything can happen in this crazy world....lol....I want an invite to the wedding.....but perhaps, and I'm just playing devil's advocate here...maybe,.there are some deeper reasons why you have picked a woman to be the object of your love, affection and devotion that is so far away? The odds aren't good, and I know your smart enough to know that, not impossible....but even if you win her heart, what next? Are you willing to leave Australia, would she be willing to leave the US....huge obstacles to overcome.

I'm sorry if I am not sounding supportive, for whatever reason destiny brought us to this thread, I've grown to care about you, and I want to speak honestly, there are pros and cons to being a "romantic"...and I have learned this the hard way....I'm just asking you to think about this from a more practical point of view too...

reply to post by AthlonSavage


LOL...here's a cool redhead...a great song....a love song yes...but to me it is also about life too....never give up....♫

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www.youtube.com...

reply to post by MountainLaurel


Mountain Laurel you treat me so well. The words you say are magic they flow effortlessly and speak volumes to me. Your story of your first love was touching. I can understand why you pine for your man. At first i thought you might be overreacting when talking about you love but now i understand why hes so emotionally potent in your heart.

Ill be honest about the oddsn with Laura. You see she doesnt even know im alive, she hasnt sent me a message on facebook at all despite all the messages i have put on her page. My profiles public and easy to access. Shes has sent me no messages and therefore i have to face reality obviously not interested in me at all

That is heartbreaking to me very much. Despite that you have slowly brought my courage and strength levels up enough to admit that truth to myself. It hurt but it would of hurt much much more without you here talking to me.

A clarivoyant on Ats read my tarot and she adviced me to pause and walk slowly at the moment. I feel like you have brought me to the pause and i can see things more clearer. I dont consider anything is inpossible mabey im not seeing something and this pause may help me unlock something.

I so agree with what you say about having sex. A man needs to think about if doing that will hurt the feelings of a woman who isnt the participant. If i knew there was a woman i loved would be hurting if i did it i wouldnt do it. Sex is great but love always wins my heart so love always will have the higher ground for me over sex.

Im sorry for my late repy. The time zone difference is a real lager today because i couldnt post a reply until i got home from work. Thanks for the song link i think you realise i have weakness for red heads. Now well you a blonde and really im impressed, you are an honoray redhead in my book.

reply to post by MountainLaurel

LOL...here's a cool redhead...a great song....a love song yes...but to me it is also about life too....never give up....♫

I like the songs you pick they are relaxing me. Its kind of funny how we togther have turned this thread into our own. It started off as the devils and we made it our own. This is the thread of threads perfect. Your right about not giving up. It is worth chanting that every week, and sometimes every day if need be. You have put me in such a good mood again that i will sleep like a baby tonight.

reply to post by AthlonSavage


Well, it makes me happy that our interactions in this thread have been helpful to you....they have been helpful to me too.. Who would have thought a thread about devil worshping would lead to what I would call God's intervention on the road to healing for us both.

It is possible that Laura may have so many things posted on her FB, especially if it is a public page, that she really didn't understand you were reaching out to her, but yeah, it doesn't look good, I'm sorry. I would take the time to reflect on what it was about her that caused such strong emotions for you? I know you were attracted to her beauty, but there had to be more than that to become so infactuated with her. This will give you more insight into what your looking for in a partner, and hopefully guide you toward the right woman for you, lol, and may I suggest you keep your search closer to home !

I also had Woody draw me a card and do a reading in her Tarot thread here on ATS...she's good...my reading was amazingly accurate. My ex and I used to love doing readings with his tarot cards and runes, I miss that

As for myself, I could use a reality check too, it scares me that I will never get over this guy and I have zero desire to meet anyone new. I have been asked out on dates, but I'm not going to play games with other people, I'm still in Love, and casual sex isn't my thing, but I'm lonely to feel a man's arms around me, his arms.

We actually were going to get together for a visit this mn and ended up having a fight, and haven't spoken since, and that seems to be what always happens, no closure, old wounds that never seem to heal.....we are both hyper-sensative and the smallest things seem to trigger feelings we never resolved. I feel he is often times cold and distant, and I guess he would say I'm needy and insecure...but I don't think I was that way before he cheated so many times....I think he tried, but I don't think being with only one girl could make him happy, at least not me. He wanted kids, but I was unable to get pregnant, he's only 40, maybe he could still have a family, and maybe I am being selfish to not just leave him alone.

I had a fantasy that he would read this thread and join in and declare his Love for me, that's most likely not going to happen. He's mad at me for moving away, and the whole story is complicated, there's no way I could leave my family right now, and no way he will move here. We had plans to move in together again, LOL, cause I guess we didn't learn our lesson the first time, maybe this time it would have worked, but now my Dad is sick, and I am his main caregiver, and my sister is close by to help me. I understand why he doesn't want to live with my crazy sick Dad, but it is my duty right now.

I had hoped we could work out the distance issue and remain a couple, until my sister and I could figure out what to do, but there's nothing we can do, he's too young and still healthy for the most part, it's his mind that is giving out, we're not going to put him in a home, she has a husband and family, so he live's with me for now. I thought I would die when he asked me to send back his Grandma's ring, changed his status on FB to single, and basically his life is no longer any of my business I guess. It just sucks, and it's sad.

Thanks for giving me a safe place to land today, and I hope you have a wonderful day....some girl in CA is sending you good vibes...and very much appreciates the good vibes you have sent her.....

reply to post by MountainLaurel


Mountain Laurel l love Laura because she represents an outlook on life i know is full and has heart. This is not about her looks, shes beautiful but not in a model sense. Her beauty is her wholeness, her expression of intellience and the conviction in the way she speaks and her poetry speaks to my inner heart. Please do not misintrepret anything i have said to mean anything less than love. I dont care about distance. And i dont care if other people think im irrational. The path of my heart leads to her. At the same time you have made me realize all my thoughst were about me, me, me. I realised i need to think about her. And retracted my intrusion into her space as i care about her, i dont want to hurt her. I know you understand. Shes the Magdalena of life. The river of strength, where all points in and out of my consciousness intersect and flow back out to the river of love.

I understand about the sick dad caregiver. My dad and mother had some health issues, I spent the last five years for them and had no life. They are in good health again now. It was hard for me, and i cried inside alot but im a tough guy i never will give up, even on a woman i love.

reply to post by AthlonSavage


I understand....your romantic spirit is wonderful to behold.....I hope you find your way to your "Laura".....I'm not feeling too much like talking today...just saying hi....here's a cool song you might like.....



www.youtube.com...

I think you've confused the elites favorite pastime as something weirdo outcast are into.


Satanic Ritual Abuse is the scary one.