posted on Apr, 27 2012 @ 02:58 AM
I was first 15 years old I believe when I started to really question everything that there is, including consciousness. People would look at me weird
and then revert back to feeling a sense of certainty that this physical plane and each morning we awake to, is the one, the only, and that the planets
and stars are just background static, real enough for most humans to believe in, just because one can view this with their own eyes and a decent
telescope, but not real enough in the sense that we can't see ourselves going to the stars anytime soon, or the mentality that the physical plane is
just of more importance, so screw the rest.
I'm unsure if this is the only "consciousness" or "reality", due to a spiritual experience I had two years ago, and another most recently. I
won't state the basis of this experience to avoid controversy, but perhaps someone will pick up on what I'm speaking of. In both instances my mind
was plunged into a sea of thought I had never experienced before. Running thousands of thoughts every hour at a pace that drowned out the illusion of
time, and with no perception of time, things felt terrifying. Without a perception of time I began to question much more and came to accept that my
mind was working at a pace I had never experienced before.
With time gone, falling asleep was impossibly frightening, because every few minutes or so I would be wondering if I had yet fallen asleep, or if
morning was here. It was all one, all connected, and I was genuinely confused by this. My perception became a snail's view, my thoughts, an eagle's
eye, and everything remained constant, at one, and I felt myself go through sphere of reality after sphere. After so long I had felt as though I was
thrown into another dimension, and what I saw, felt, was nothing like normal consciousness.
By the time I was myself again, I felt an intense appreciation of the regular rhythm of normal perception, the ability to use time, to plan out our
day, to use the world as our own canvas.
Both experiences changed my entire life, and made way for a gradually siphening of knowledge that is still pitter-pattering down into my cerebral
cortex to this day, and because of such experiences, I just cannot let go of the idea that there's a lot more to all of this than we'd like to
organize in our brains. We need some blanket of security. In those states of mind, you come to face everything about yourself, things long lost, the
bitter truth of the duality of reality.
It makes this world, this consciousness, seem like the real otherwordly experience, the real magic, though for this to exist, I feel there must be
other levels, other branches to the one large tree. Yggdrasil they called it in Norse mythology, with marble-like worlds running off the one tree, one
eternal pool of white water, pure knowledge. Each world projected as a swirl of cosmic mass, bulbs at the ends of delicate branches. There are many
layers to this.
I don't think many of us are truly aware of just how amazing this opportunity is to be on this planet. If not plastered with so much negativity and
fear, perhaps we'd be able to feel at one with nature and the planet like past cultures once were, like certain cultures still are, of the Amazon, of
the mountains of Tibet and elsewhere, isolated.
Growing up in this western world, with a chosen view of the world drilled into my brain since birth, I have come to accept that even the educational
systems dumb us down to a degree, in a way so as we do not question much of anything. Labour workers, devoid and punished for the urge to have other
experiences, to live in happiness, to be our own individual, truly.