My 7 year old suspened for "sexual harassment"

my honest opinion is this. when I read the first post I (immediately) knew the OP was sugar coating when he said to cover up her backside. I knew the kid was trying something. I can read inbetween the lines and see through made up BS. The kid was suspended for vulgar behaviour. Anything else is BS. My verdict doesn't matter because he's another failure of life now and noone should try to serve them as citizens because they are now publicallydegraded.

Originally posted by jjkenobi
It's so absurd... but here's the problem. Even if you pull your kid out and home-school or send to a private school you are STILL PAYING taxes to support the broken public school system. Something has to be done.

I totally agree. But unfortunately there probably will be no big 'overhaul'. TPTB have the public schools set up just the way they want them, and they aren't going to let anybody just storm in and demand changes.

Originally posted by Xaphan
reply to post by UdderlyInsane

 

What's next? "No-verbal communication schools"?

Sooner than later it seems

Originally posted by coop039
My biggest concern here is the sexual harassment charge on his school record. There was nothing sexual about it, hes 7, he doesnt even know what sex is. I think "inappropriate behavior" would better fit the situation. If this stays on his record he will be forever labled.

A couple years back, just before kindergarten, he was trying to wear his pants saggy, he saw kids in the area doing it. I made a real big deal about it, and was very stern about him NOT wearing his pants like that. He understands not touching other kids, but he is confused about this. He kept saying "but I was only helping her pull her pants up".

He had alot adults in his face yesterday over this, so Im sure hes a bit shaken.

I was just going to ask about that. You see, my husband has made some comments about kids pants that sag like that need to be pulled up and worn without underwear showing. My daughter has heard her father say this. So, it wouldn't be far fetched for our daughter to pull up someone's sagging pants just to help them out. It wouldn't be a sexual act, but an act from the mind of a child trying to help another. I'm sorry you are going through this and hope it ends quickly. I do feel for your son. This is ridiculous.

Originally posted by FrankieGT

 

my honest opinion is this. when I read the first post I (immediately) knew the OP was sugar coating when he said to cover up her backside. I knew the kid was trying something. I can read inbetween the lines and see through made up BS. The kid was suspended for vulgar behaviour. Anything else is BS. My verdict doesn't matter because he's another failure of life now and noone should try to serve them as citizens because they are now publicallydegraded.

Did ya miss this part

A couple years back, just before kindergarten, he was trying to wear his pants saggy, he saw kids in the area doing it. I made a real big deal about it, and was very stern about him NOT wearing his pants like that. He understands not touching other kids, but he is confused about this. He kept saying "but I was only helping her pull her pants up".

What's more vulgar. Showing your crack or pulling up somebody's pants.

Whole damn thing has been blown WAY outta proportion. They. are. little. kids.

reply to post by Xaphan



Whats Next? I think the next obvious step is home schooling for all kids, but in a more global sense. Instead of taking a bus and having social interaction with other children at a place of higher education, your kids will be getting up for school, walking down to the computer and doing a video conference with his/her teacher.

Look at all the responses in here already about home schooling. Couple that with the feeling about how the children are being dumbed down, and not learning common sense/ critical thinking skills. (Other threads within ATS)
Along with that info, there is threads like these, peoples children getting accused of sexual harassment at age 7.

In my mind, there is only one obvious outcome. Schooling will done at home, unless you can afford to pay for private school.

Just the way it works out in my head, my personal opinion.

Thanks,
Blend57

Originally posted by Xaphan
reply to post by UdderlyInsane

 

Pfft... "No-contact schools".

That's a good way to make sure a kid grows up emotionally unstable and anti-social. Maybe that's the way the system wants it...

What's next? "No-verbal communication schools"?

I would star your post ten times if I could!

Long story short, a friend of mine was telling me about how her daughter's teacher didn't allow the kids to communicate with one another in her class. They can speak with the teacher and that is it.

Anyone can go to college and study education, graduate, and become a teacher, but that sure does not make them a teacher, a person who likes children, or possess the mental faculties that should be present in common sense and logic when dealing with children.

reply to post by coop039


I hate and despise knee jerk reactions in the school system. That being said, I completed my paralegal degree several years ago in order to act as an advocate for my son who had a severe anxiety disorder. The school was trying to treat it as a diciplanary problem and wanted to place him in alternative school because he would not speak to adults outside the family.

You will need to hire an attorney that specializes in advocating for students; look for an attorney that specializes in special ed law. I realize that your son is probably not special ed, but special ed law attorneys are intimately familiar with school systems. One of the best from my home state is a former state school superintendant.

If you post which state you are in, I'll try to provide you with some links to attorneys. You should also be looking at the school systems diciplinary process and appeals. Its been my experience that there is an appelate process, but you must ask for the appeal and it is time sensitive.

To recap the best advice I've seen so far

Originally posted by WeRpeons
I would suggest to look into if your son had any previous sexual hands on touching before jumping the gun. Was this the only incident? If it was, this would be drastic and way out of line. A veteran teacher would at least take the boy aside and explain to him why touching a girl in a particular manner is inappropriate behavior. Having said that, if a girl is extremely upset about a particular incident, the teacher would have no other choice but to report the incident to his or her supervisor. Considering the age, it could have been the boy didn't know any better or maybe he saw something on TV that made him feel it was ok to do such a thing.

Sometimes teachers don't document observations as well as they should. It could be your son has been observed previously with inappropriate touching and this incident was the one that broke the camel's back. Most teacher's do have desk top or lap top computers. Documenting observed behavior is quite simple now just by creating a file on each student in Word and entering the date and a quick observation statement.

I would suggest to ask the teacher who wrote the referral if your son has ever been observed sexually touching girls before this incident. If he hasn't, and there hasn't been previous documentation of other incidents, I would think the school wouldn't be justified in asking for an evaluation.

Originally posted by Aisling

Originally posted by Xaphan
reply to post by UdderlyInsane

 

Pfft... "No-contact schools".

That's a good way to make sure a kid grows up emotionally unstable and anti-social. Maybe that's the way the system wants it...

What's next? "No-verbal communication schools"?

I would star your post ten times if I could!

Long story short, a friend of mine was telling me about how her daughter's teacher didn't allow the kids to communicate with one another in her class. They can speak with the teacher and that is it.

Anyone can go to college and study education, graduate, and become a teacher, but that sure does not make them a teacher, a person who likes children, or possess the mental faculties that should be present in common sense and logic when dealing with children.

This proves to me that one of the ulterior motives of the public school systems is to strip kids of all personality, creativity, and individuality. You can tell that the idea of creating little lifeless worker-drone robots excites them to no end. Public schools are just a cookie cutter system. John Lennon ranted and raved about this immensely. The only difference is, it's much worse now than it was back then, and it will continue to get worse, decade after decade.

I am reminded of this scene from The Simpsons. It was intended to be funny, but sadly it's actually becoming a reality...

Originally posted by Aisling
I would star your post ten times if I could!

Good news, you can! Just go make nine additional accounts!

reply to post by Pigraphia


It's a shame that in a "civilized society", the very administrations that are supposed to exist for our benefit, seldom do.

reply to post by desert


Respectfully, this advice you've highlighted, regardless of the intent, has the effect and design of protecting the teacher and school, and not the child. If - giving the advice the benefit of the doubt - the child had all ready been engaged in inappropriate behavior but the parent is only now hearing about it, not because it has been reported that previous inappropriate behavior has taken place but because the parent took this advice and asked if there were prior incidents, this reflects a remarkable incompetence on the part of the teacher. No parent should have to discover that their child has been touching girls inappropriately by having their son sent home for suspension only to discover for the first time that the problem goes further back than the incident that caused the suspension.

If the child had been involved in inappropriate touching prior to this suspension, the school had an obligation to inform the parent of this, and it is not okay to suggest that perhaps teachers do not document such incidents as well as they should but let's give them the benefit of the doubt and even offer up a legal strategy on their behalf at the expense of the child.

Schools do not exist to protect teachers - tenure notwithstanding - they exist for the children. The O.P. has not indicated any prior incidents and to assume there may be some is an assumption biased towards the teacher and school, and alarmingly an assumption that goes as far as to suggest that teachers can be incompetent in their documentation but that's okay if it is not documented just ask (read suggest) if your son has a history of molestation.

Legally speaking this is horrible advice, and as much as I detest the priest class lawyer sect, I am certain that no competent lawyer would ever give such imprudent advice.

reply to post by Jean Paul Zodeaux

Lawyers will take the O.P. down the rabbit hole and then leave him all alone with the Mad Hatter and the crazy as a loon Queen, only to shrug their shoulders indifferently if they fail to accomplish anything on the O.P.'s behalf. The priest class lawyer sect are not concerned with unalienable rights, and will gladly surrender any challenges of jurisdiction for the much more profitable arbitration that comes with failing to properly challenge jurisdiction. A lawyer will grant the Child Protective Services or whatever the name of that agency is jurisdiction just to have more billing hours.

I often hear it said that a man who represents himself in court has a fool for a lawyer. Increasingly, any fool who relies upon a lawyer is the bigger fool.

That has been my experience. The Judge, the clerics, and the lawyers all work together for the purpose of extracting as much money as possible. The whole system is completely insane, and they work at depriving us of our rights at every turn.

While at the same time, they seem to want to encourage the real criminals. The real criminals are free advertisement.

Just wanted to update everyone.

Wow, some of the hateful responses floor me........My fault for breeding? Im a failure as a father? Failed at life?
I really am speechless over those........

To answer a few questions, Im in St. Louis Mo, he has never displayed a behavior like this before, I am not sugar coating or lying about this.

The meeting this morning went very well, better then I expected. We got the suspension lowered to 5 days from 8, my son was still in the wrong and should not have touch the girl, I have acknowledged this from the start. And his record now says "inappropriate behavior" for this incident.

I want to thank everyone for the support,advice, and personnal experiences shared here.
And to those who were so hateful, well, I hope your life gets better and you can start being being happy.

reply to post by coop039



This goes to the heart of "The Boy Crisis". They're hitting on males, particularly young ones, so as to lessen the threat that the future generation of men can pose to their plans. Whether it be appointing below-average looking feminists with chips on their shoulders to run universities, ensuring that more females graduate than males, appointing women to positions far beyond their competence, or like the example stated above, it's undeniably a diabolical scheme to further what we've been increasingly aware of.

Here's a fine and straightforward take on the topic.

www.fredoneverything.net...

Originally posted by coop039
Just wanted to update everyone.

Wow, some of the hateful responses floor me........My fault for breeding? Im a failure as a father? Failed at life?
I really am speechless over those........

To answer a few questions, Im in St. Louis Mo, he has never displayed a behavior like this before, I am not sugar coating or lying about this.

The meeting this morning went very well, better then I expected. We got the suspension lowered to 5 days from 8, my son was still in the wrong and should not have touch the girl, I have acknowledged this from the start. And his record now says "inappropriate behavior" for this incident.

I want to thank everyone for the support,advice, and personnal experiences shared here.
And to those who were so hateful, well, I hope your life gets better and you can start being being happy.

Glad to hear it went well. What happened with DFS and the psych evaluation? Do you still have to deal with that?

Originally posted by coop039
Just wanted to update everyone.

Wow, some of the hateful responses floor me........My fault for breeding? Im a failure as a father? Failed at life?
I really am speechless over those........

The meeting this morning went very well, better then I expected. We got the suspension lowered to 5 days from 8, my son was still in the wrong and should not have touch the girl, I have acknowledged this from the start. And his record now says "inappropriate behavior" for this incident.

Awesome! Glad things went that way. Still think your son was just being a little boy.

Aw, forget about those holier-than-thou people. Evidently they weren't ever a little kid.

Pulling for ya, coop!

Time

Originally posted by kaylaluv

Originally posted by coop039
Just wanted to update everyone.

Wow, some of the hateful responses floor me........My fault for breeding? Im a failure as a father? Failed at life?
I really am speechless over those........

To answer a few questions, Im in St. Louis Mo, he has never displayed a behavior like this before, I am not sugar coating or lying about this.

The meeting this morning went very well, better then I expected. We got the suspension lowered to 5 days from 8, my son was still in the wrong and should not have touch the girl, I have acknowledged this from the start. And his record now says "inappropriate behavior" for this incident.

I want to thank everyone for the support,advice, and personnal experiences shared here.
And to those who were so hateful, well, I hope your life gets better and you can start being being happy.

Glad to hear it went well. What happened with DFS and the psych evaluation? Do you still have to deal with that?

The indication of the DFS involvement came from a teacher that called, the principle had no knowledge of this and he said he would know as he has to sign off and stuff like that.

reply to post by coop039


Good, and thank you for the update. Please, please be careful about DFS. I hope this is on its way to over for you and your son, I truly do; but I am skeptical.

Those who wanted to see the initial letter I recieved, I can PDF if and email it to someone who knows how to post a PDF here. I will block out personal info of course.