AN ACTUAL CRAIG'S LIST PERSONALS AD

I got this in a e-mail from a friend. Seems like a good way to punish someone who tries to mug you.

Craig's list ad--Read it closely folks... a good one.
AN ACTUAL CRAIG'S LIST PERSONALS AD
To the Guy Who Tried to Mug Me in Downtown Savannah night before last.
Date: 2011-11-27, 1:43 am. E.S.T.

I was the guy wearing the black Burberry jacket that you demanded that I hand over, shortly after you pulled the knife on me and my girlfriend, threatening our lives. You also asked for my girlfriend's purse and earrings. I can only hope that you somehow come across this rather important message.

First, I'd like to apologize for your embarrassment; I didn't expect you to actually mess in your pants when I drew my pistol after you took my jacket.. The evening was not that cold, and I was wearing the jacket for a reason.. my girlfriend was happy that I just returned safely from my 2nd tour as a Combat Marine in Afghanistan .. She had just bought me that Kimber Custom Model 1911 .45 ACP pistol for my birthday, and we had picked up a shoulder holster for it that very evening. Obviously you agree that it is a very intimidating weapon when pointed at your head ... isn't it?!

I know it probably wasn't fun walking back to wherever you'd come from with mess in your pants. I'm sure it was even worse walking bare-footed since I made you leave your shoes, cell phone, and wallet with me. [That prevented you from calling or running to your buddies to come help mug us again].

After I called your mother or "Momma" as you had her listed in your cell, I explained the entire episode of what you'd done. Then I went and filled up my gas tank as well as those of four other people in the gas station, -- on your credit card. The guy with the big motor home took 153 gallons and was extremely grateful!

I gave your shoes to a homeless guy outside Vinnie Van Go Go's, along with all the cash in your wallet. [That made his day!]

I then threw your wallet into the big pink "pimp mobile" that was parked at the curb ..... after I broke the windshield and side window and keyed the entire driver's side of the car.

Earlier, I managed to get in two threatening phone calls to the DA's office and one to the FBI, while mentioning President Obama as my possible target.

The FBI guy seemed really intense and we had a nice long chat (I guess while he traced your number etc.).
;In a way, perhaps I should apologize for not killing you ... but I feel this type of retribution is a far more appropriate punishment for your threatened crime. I wish you well as you try to sort through some of these rather immediate pressing issues, and can only hope that you have the opportunity to reflect upon, and perhaps reconsider, the career path you've chosen to pursue in life.. Remember, next time you might not be so lucky.

Have a good day!
Thoughtfully yours, Semper Fi,
Alex

Unfortunately, it's not...

www.abovetopsecret.com...

OMG! I hope like hell thats was true... Perfect..

I would of hoped for the best afterwards for the robber! Ha yea right

Love to here him talk his way out of what he has to answer for.

To funny1

Jesse

sounds like the fantasy of some over-weight flag waving republican

and even more irritating is the fact that the message implies that the mugger was black, no doubt a large portion of ATS members will find find the message inspiring none-the-less

reply to post by ofhumandescent


I almost crapped my pants reading this!

I am most certainly in a wonderful state of LOL...

This is why I like military guys. Nice.

P.S. To the marine:
Sir,God bless your balls.

Originally posted by QQXXw
sounds like the fantasy of some over-weight flag waving republican

and even more irritating is the fact that the message implies that the mugger was black, no doubt a large portion of ATS members will find find the message inspiring none-the-less

edit on 21-4-2012 by QQXXw because: (no reason given)

After reading your post, I re-read the OP .... twice. While I agree that the story is most likely made up (though rather nice to think it could have happened had it not involved damaging the vehicle of an uninvolved party), I would love to hear your explanation of how you arrived at your conclusions.

1. Did I miss the part where the purported victims were carrying a flag?

2. You have the ability to determine from a story whether or not the author is overweight? Can you share how you do that?

3. Do only Republicans serve in the military? Or maybe only Republicans get mugged? Or maybe only Republicans fantasize? I would be very interested in how you profiled and ferreted out the Republican who perpetrated this likely fictitious story.

4. Is it offensive to you for someone to be patriotic enough to wave the flag of their Country?

And the next two are the most important!

5. In what bizarre mental universe do you reside for you to draw the conclusion from anything in that story to indicate "the mugger was black"?!!

6. Does it occur to you that your assumption that "the mugger was black" is YOUR own bigotry coming through? You might want to consider taking a little personal inventory about your own ethnic biases as there was nothing, whatsoever, in that entire little story to indicate the ethnicity of either the "criminal," the "victims," the anonymous strangers at the gas station or even the pimp whose car got keyed.

Did you not receive the notice of the Site Owners/Admins thread that the race-baiting will stop? You might want to find and review that one. I believe most ATS users would appreciate it.

Shame on you for insulting about 90% of the population, one way or another, with your two sentences and small mind. How sad.

Hoax.

Closed.,