The Best Rant Ever - It will make your day! - Talk about Valid Points - Straight To It! WARNING stro

Came across this rant - admit it's not mine - this is a true letter (apparently) from a person in the UK who is hoping to renew his passport.

It's the best rant ever!

Dear Sirs,

I'm in the process of renewing my passport, and I am losing the will to live. How is it that Sky Television has my address and telephone number and knows that I bought a #ing satellite dish from them back in 1977, and yet, the Government is still asking me where I was #ing born and on what date..

For # sake, do you guys do this by hand? My birth date you have
on my pension book, and it is on all the income tax forms I've filed
for the past 30 years. It is on my National Health card, my driving
license, my car insurance, on the last eight #ing passports I've had,
on all those stupid customs declaration forms I've had to fill out
before being allowed off the plane over the last 30 years, and all
those insufferable census forms.

Would somebody please take note, once and for all, that my mother's
name is Mary Anne, my father's name is Robert and I'd be absolutely #ing astounded if that ever changed between now and when I die!!!!!!

I apologise, because I'm really pissed off this morning. Between you an' me, I've had enough of this #! You send the application form to my house, then you ask me for my #ing address!!!!

What the # is going on? Do you have a bunch of neanderthal arseholes working there? Look at my #ing picture.. Do I look like Bin Laden? I just want to go and park my arse on some nice sandy beach somewhere and would someone please tell me, why would you give a # whether I plan on visiting a farm in the next 15 days?

Well, I have to sign off now, because I have to go to the other end of the #ing city to get another #ing copy of my birth certificate, to the
tune of £30. Would it be so complicated to have all the services in the
same spot to assist in the issuance of a new passport the same day??
Nooooooooooooo, that'd be too #ing easy and maybe make sense. You'd rather have us running all over the #in' place like chooks with our heads cut off, then have to find some arsehole to confirm that it's really me on the damn picture - you know, the one where we're not
allowed to smile?! (bureaucratic #in' morons) Hey, do you know why
we couldn't smile if we wanted to? Because we're totally hacked off!

Signed

An Irate Citizen.

P.S. Remember what I said above about the picture and getting someone to confirm that it's me? Well, my family has been in this country since 1776 .......... I have served in the military for something over 30 years and have had full security clearances over 25 of those years enabling me to undertake highly secretive work all over the world and the UK
......... However, I have to get someone 'important' to verify who I am
- you know, someone like my doctor - WHO WAS BORN AND RAISED IN #ING PAKISTAN !
Sincerely,

So bloody true, they know every detail about us when it suits them, however when it doesn't suit them we have to fill in labourous forms that cost us a small fortune!!! £70 to get a piece of plastic that states who I am and that I'm an adult, doesn't stop them charging me as an adult without proof of my age when I want to jump the bus or go the cinema!!

Time to login to ATS?: 10 seconds

Time to read this post?: 60 seconds

Time to write a reply?: 30 seconds

Reading the righteous indignation from this "Irate Citizen"?: Priceless!

I can't stop laughing about it - even though it's not funny at all.

We should all copy this letter and send it in with our next Passport Application along with Monopoly Money - let's face it that's the kind of money they're dealing with.

This needs to be posted on bulletin boards at the passport office.

reply to post by yourmaker


Fantastic rant! Love your signature!

Absolutely a perfect rant that fits my situation just today....Im not joking I just finished sitting at the kitchen table filling out the forms for the following which all come due on you birth date here.
New health card, new drivers license, and a new validation for my plates to drive......

What a mess and a pile of paper work and I too have to travel to more than one government office and stand in line this week for probably hours. (I just did the paper work here at home)

I figure it is a world wide thing that people dread because I know the wife and myself here just shudder at the thought of going to the government to pay them money and to stand in line for hours.

Plus during your wait in line or whatever you are treated like a piece of sh*t and not the one whom is paying their very high wages with full benefits.
I doubt very much that they(government staff) stand in line or fill out stupid forums which are the same year after year after year....

To the OP S&F for relaying the post here and the laugh we had ........mind you it was through gritted teeth.
Regards, Iwinder

reply to post by Iwinder


It really is getting out of control and it doesn't help when the memory is failing either!

What we should do is pay an accountant or some kind of Secretary to do the work and hand the Bill in with all the documents and simply say - "You want it - You Pay for it". And in all seriousness, why not???

Call it a PROCESSING FEE

Originally posted by quedup
reply to post by Iwinder

 

It really is getting out of control and it doesn't help when the memory is failing either!

What we should do is pay an accountant or some kind of Secretary to do the work and hand the Bill in with all the documents and simply say - "You want it - You Pay for it". And in all seriousness, why not???

Call it a PROCESSING FEE

edit on 15-4-2012 by quedup because: (no reason given)

Agreed sound like a plan, lets start a company and you can do the finagling and I will do the kick some ass part:-)

Regards, Iwinder

Come on guys lets face it: If I want something I have to pay for it so the same should go both ways - if they want something - they pay for it especially as it is duplicate information they're requesting over and over again. Information they already have.

What fools we are - WE DO THE WORK, ALL THE HOURS SPENT, ALL THE RUNNING AROUND - TIME IS MONEY AND THEY GET PAID FOR IT! HELLO - WHAT HAVE THEY DONE AND WE PAY THEM!!!!!!

It really is time for folks to act on this and show the irony of it all - it's really starting to P me off - the more I think about it the more unfair it seems.

When all they need do is send out a letter asking if your circumstances have changed????? (then again they'd probably charge you for the letter)

TIME THE TABLES WERE TURNED!




I've stopped laughing!!!!!

Hilarious. I loved it. Makes me remember the phone call I received a while back from some government official. The first thing he asked me was "Can I have your phone number"? Duh!

reply to post by Truthandinfo


Love it

i recived a letter one time asking me about my dyslexia . but this guy sounds fun love to hear him go of on one for real

reply to post by geobro


Yeah that would be good - he does sound like he's really come to the end of the line - must be from up North lol

reply to post by quedup


got it in one pal were all heed the balls up here

reply to post by quedup


LOL Thank you! that was hilarious
saved the best line for last too!

However, I have to get someone 'important' to verify who I am
- you know, someone like my doctor - WHO WAS BORN AND RAISED IN #ING PAKISTAN !

That was epic. The man brings up a valid point. Why all the need for verification? Shouldn't an expired passport be good enough to get another one? Does it not prove you are indeed who you say your are? That would make things so much easier...in a perfect world

reply to post by geobro


Yip - I remember it well - they say it as it is - nee messin aboot!

reply to post by Forevever


That last line truly was a corker and said it all!

It just cracked me up.

reply to post by quedup

This rant is not off topic at all. Thanks for sharing it.

You send the application form to my house, then you ask me for my #ing address!!!!

Precious...