I HATE being awake

I'm the kind of person who knows what I like, and what I don't like. I have personal preferences, I have my own moral compass, etc. Not needing to be told what to think, wear, listen to, watch and feel has always made me an outsider. But I've mostly been ok with that.

Being married over the past couple of years to someone who fully embraces the mainstream culture has caused me to be exposed to all kinds of things that I'd previously avoided. I'm really shocked at how bad things have gotten over the past decade.

There are tons of examples already on this site, so I don't want to take up too much space preaching to the choir. Basically what I see in our culture is saturating it with sex, making unhealthy food seem healthy, rewarding selfishness while discouraging empathy, using fear to make people passive, among other things.

As messed up as those things are, that's not the difficult part for me to deal with. It's the apathy that I see all around me. People follow the mainstream culture like sheep and will mindlessly obey. It says to argue about gay marriage and people rush to their laptops to argue on Facebook. It says to choose Coke or Pepsi and people pick one and proceed to ignore Shasta (or herbal tea, for that matter). It says to let your kids listen to songs about bondage sex and parents shrug their shoulders and sing along.

This month is Child Abuse Awareness month. A friend of mine is volunteering for the cause, even dying her hair blue because it's an issue that hits home. But then she watches shows like "Dance Moms" and "Toddlers & Tiaras", which glorify the psychological abuse of children.

My son says that the kids at school are always singing quotes from songs like "Everyday I'm shuffling". I can't help but wonder if there are 9-year olds singing "tonight I'm f**king you". If there are, I'm betting nobody bats an eyelash.

The ironic part is that if we had jumped from 70's or 80's culture to this culture, the same people who embrace it now would be shocked and appalled. But because it's been introduced at such a slow and steady pace, people accept it as normal. Also, it isn't JUST about the present. Once you look back and follow history up to the present, it isn't too difficult to see where we are heading. This is not as bad as it's going to get, because we are always "pushing the envelope".

This isn't a matter of getting old either; I've felt this way since high school.

Sorry this is so long, I just needed to rant. It really sucks when you are the only person in your circle of friends & family who thinks like this. Being vocal about it only isolates me further because people have no idea what I'm talking about. I feel alone and helpless, and it's nice to come to a site like this and be able to talk about it. Thank you for reading.

I share your irritation bro, Things seem so obvious to me but people go about their everyday lives all around me not really knowing whats going on, more interested in whether or not their Friend will be wearing the same outfit they just bout that evening etc..
Of course not taking part in such silly and unnecessary ritualistic thought makes a recluse however ill never be ashamed of the way i think because at the end of the day I understand.

I deal with it by just smiling and nodding when the dullards start spouting drivel. Inside sometimes I am laughing sometimes I am crying. You can't teach enlightenment you can't fix stupid. You are not alone seek out others who are operating on the same level as you. Sometimes you outgrow things and people and it leaves a big gaping hole in your life, fill it with something good and meaning full.

I am amazed at the number of people who express their feelings of being alone and isolated on all the web sites I frequent. Yet there are hundreds of other like minded people on the same site feeling the same feelings. Always makes me think of the song Eleanor Rigby by the Beatles. Sometimes life puts good people who will later turn out to be important players in your life right in your path but sometimes times you just have to seek them out.

Sending well wishes and good thoughts your way my friend!

I must say I agree with you and enjoyed reading your rant.

I have tried avoiding MSM for as long as I can remember aswell, I can just see right through the brainwashing.

As an example, two shows about teen pregnancy are on MTV. Personally, I cannot stand MTV, I never have liked the shows on it but it's what folks my age like watching. Anyways, my point is that we agree MTV is piloted at people aged 14-25, roughly and there are not just one, but TWO shows all about teen pregnancy. Teen Mom & 16 and Pregnant.

I was sitting in the livingroom with my uncle, whilst visiting him a few days ago and we were flipping through channels trying to get to Quantum Leap & we happened to see Teen Mom along the way.

So of course I went on my rant about how it's encouraging young women to have babies because they think it'll bring all of this drama and then happiness, sadness, a rollercoaster of attention because they see it being done on TV.

And my uncle said to me "You know damn well atleast ONE girl has purposely gotten pregnant just to be on one of these shows"

The saddest part is, he's definitely right, and anyone who denies this is foolish in the least.

Really, there are infinite things I see wrong with MSM television, music, websites, etc and I could go on and on but this is one of the things that burns me up the most.

Thanks for the post m'dear

Another thing is it is extremely tiring to avoid things like this and still try to fit in. The same people that didn't know the Titanic was a real event are the ones that lash out on me because they can't believe I have never watched an episode of Jersey Shore, or I didn't know who Tila Tequila was until they "enlightened me".

I am the crazy one in this world, I am the outcast for this. Unbelievable.

Oh, I forgot to address the title of my topic: the reason I hate being awake is because it only seems to hurt my relationships. It makes me unrelatable. I rarely say anything because I don't want to hurt the ones I care about. It's a strange concept to me, but apparently criticizing one's chosen entertainment is synonymous with criticizing the person who enjoys them. They get offended and call you a "hater". So to summarize, my choices are: 1) hurt those I care about, while in the process alienating myself, or 2) do my best to ignore what I see and pretend to enjoy it. Hence the hating to be awake, and wishing I was asleep.

reply to post by Ladysophiaofsandoz

It's true about message boards such as this being filled with like-minded people, and I am very grateful for that. However, it's not really a satisfying substitute for having the same eye-to-eye conversations with people who are close to you in real life.

reply to post by GreenEyedVixen

Thank you, I'm glad that you are able to relate. I'm glad that you mentioned the Mtv pregnancy shows. One of the things that I see that really disturbs me is how society seems to be trying the merge sex and children. While 16 and Pregnant isn't the end result, it's definitely a rung on the ladder. Someday soon there will most likely be a "15 and Pregnant". Then, eventually, a "14 and Pregnant". You see where this is going.

You're absolutely right about it being tiring trying to avoid it. It's easy for people to say "if you don't like it, turn it off". If this were the 80's, and we were discussing 2 Live Crew newest album, they would be absolutely right. In order to hear their music, you'd have to go down to the record store and purchase it. That's pretty easy to avoid.

Today's world is completely different, and that argument is unrealistic. The same stuff that you had to go out of your way to expose yourself to then is shoved in your face today.