Maybe I'm nuts....

Pretty much everyone I have told this to you has said so...what the heck I'll admit I'm a bit crazy. Anyway here's the story. This morning I put some gas in my tank, and remembered the lotto. As of this morning I heard on the news it was up to 600 million. I bought a ticket, paid for my gas and coffee and was on my way to work when this feeling struck me. Complete panic, like if I were to win this thing, something awful would happen. Flashes of that final destination movie went though my mind.

Along with those were the questions like...if I were to win this, how would it change me? I have spent my whole life believing that having large sums of money is not good for the soul. I think it's a rare person who can hang on to that amount of cash and not abuse the power that comes with it. I thought of the great things I could do with that money, like pay off my parents mortgage, buy a house for my husband and I, set my family up so they never have to worry about anything, donate to charity... etc. But along with those thoughts came the nagging feeling, that wouldn't be enough. I felt I would turn into a bad person, or something bad would happen. So I ripped up the lotto ticket into tiny little pieces, and let the breeze take it. Maybe I'm crazy, my brother said I need to be medicated, my mom called me a retard. Maybe they are right, but I can't tell you how much better I feel, not having that ticket in my wallet anymore.

Hey it was your ticket to do with as you wish.
And as you said yourself you felt better after disposing of it.
it was a small act that made a big difference to your spiritual growth.

No one has the right to criticize you and it says more about their personality and priorities when they do.
Glad that you are happy. Take care and don't listen to people who believe that millions of dollars is the answer to all life problems. I respect your action and the reasoning behind it. Take care.

It will be interesting if a year from now....the big news on MSM is, how someone won the biggest jackpot ever in lotto history....and never claimed it.....

What ever makes you feel good Sweet Pea...whatever makes you feel good.....

Des

reply to post by bekisu


bekisu,
You are not crazy, what-so-ever. You are true to yourself and strong at not letting materialistic desires get in the way of your beliefs and spirit. I do believe ofcourse you could help pay off bills, etc..but...I believe you went with your gut and this is for the better. I believe your instinct will always take care of you. I do not blame you because what money has done to the man is evil. I do not see much good for large sums of money so I dont blame you at all.
Actually, I think all these people wasting their time and money trying to win this almost impossible statistic is crazy....I also believe lusting and desiring a material money hungry life is the opposite of the goal we need to reach..therefore in my book you are the sane one, and the rest are crazy!!

You could have just given it to a poor person.

reply to post by Destinyone


That would be interesting, and rather funny. I don't regret my decision though. Sure there are lots of positives that could come from having that kind of money...but I think the negatives still outweigh them.

reply to post by Night Star


The ticket? Or the money (if by some slim chance I would have won). I guess the best way I can describe my thought process was that I could be compared to Frodo, and the ticket was the ring. I wanted it out of my possession as quickly as possible, so I wouldn't give myself a chance to change my mind. Feelings are weird.

reply to post by Katharos62191


Thank you.

That is very nice of you to say, glad so see someone of a similar mindset!

reply to post by HumansEh


Thank you as well, I appreciate that you took the time to comment. I do feel as if I've made a positive choice regarding my spiritual journey. I've been trying to be more mindful of such things lately. Having that kind of money would throw a wrench in the works for me I think.

Nuts backwards is stun.

Coincidence?

I think not!

Originally posted by bekisu
reply to post by Night Star

 

The ticket? Or the money (if by some slim chance I would have won). I guess the best way I can describe my thought process was that I could be compared to Frodo, and the ticket was the ring. I wanted it out of my possession as quickly as possible, so I wouldn't give myself a chance to change my mind. Feelings are weird.

Either the ticket or if you would have kept the ticket and won. Think of all the good you could have done in helping the homeless or whatever. I would definitley have helped others if I didn't want to keep any for myself, but that's just me.

reply to post by Night Star


I totally respect that. However, I think the temptation to use it for something not so positive would have been there. I'm not a saint, that's exactly why I got rid of it. They say money and power corrupt people, I'm not too blind to see it would probably corrupt me too, once it was in my possession. Better for me to just remove all temptation.

All that aside, I don't relish the idea of people I never speak to suddenly coming out of the woodwork, "heeey buddy long time no see." I wouldn't be able to trust anyone. I would rather avoid the "Are you talking to me, or my money kind of a scenario." It just seems like it would make life incredibly complicated.