Originally posted by antinwo101
As a man, this is the sort of thing that really, REALLY, pisses me off.
This guy's behavior gives males everywhere a bad name. On behalf of my gender, please accept my apologies....I know it doesn't probably mean a
whole lot or help very much, but I would be remiss if I did at least extend them. I know a lot of people would try saying that there are "two sides
of the story" or try to be an apologist for this asshat...however there is no excuse for dishonesty. Even if you two had not been getting along for
years or something, there is ZERO justification for the act of cheating...not to MENTION breaking your little girl's heart. Even if the two of you
ultimately had to part ways, a grown man should be able to do so with HONESTY, dignity, respect, and in a manner that accounted for your daughters
feelings/allowed her to get used to the idea, etc. What a lowlife.
As for revenge...I will not even attempt to tell you that it isn't "the answer". It is. Quite frankly, anything that makes you feel better and
puts some salve on the wound is "the answer", so long as it's overall responsible and in the best interest of you and your daughter.
I was married for the first time pretty young at age 22. My first wife was incredibly lazy and vane. However, I often turned a blind eye to it
because I loved her and I loved her son whom I had come to think of as my own. While she sat on her ass and pissed away time and money at the mall
with her friends, I was worked a full-time job, went to school full-time...and still found time to completely gut and renovate our humble abode in
Denver 1 one room at a time. Given that this was the early '00's and a ridiculously hot real estate market, the plan was that my wages from my job
allowed us to survive, my education was our future, and we anticipated about a $40-$50K profit from the "fix-and-flip" which would provide our nest
egg for the future.
For the last three months of the renovation when we did the kitchen and bathroom I actually took a SECOND part time job as a maintenance guy for a
small apartment complex because the "salary" was basically just free rent. This allowed us to have a decent place to live while the kitchen, bath,
plumbing, etc. was inoperable. During this time I was actually only sleeping FOUR HOURS every other
day. I would go to school where I had 14
credits that semester, then go to FT Job #1, come home and handle any repairs at the apt. complex, test and balance the chemicals, in the pool, etc.
I would then drive over to our BEAUTIFUL little work in progress with an industrial-sized coffee, crank some tunes, and start laying ceramic tile and
installing cabinets until dawn when I would run home, take a shower, and go back to school. Crazy as it was, I young, in love and full of energy, and
I did so with a SMILE...happy and proud that I was able to provide for my family and give my wife the life I felt she deserved.
Long story short, two days after we sold the house and the $42,000 posted to our account she cleaned out both of our joint checking accounts, took our
only vehicle, my computer which had all of my papers for school saved on it, the tools that I used to remodel the house and moved in with the guy she
had been fu%$#ng when she was "at the mall". The reason cited? I just "wasn't there for her" and we "didn't spend any time together". Mind
you...no one would have stopped her from doing a little light painting on that house or something while I was doing the heavy stuff. Oh...and she
also decided to take all of my suits and ties that I used for my FT sales job and give them to the new guy because we were apparently about the same
So there I was, homeless with no vehicle, tools, money, or even work clothes in Colorado while ALL of my family and "real" friends (not just
acquaintances) were 1400 miles away in Wisconsin where I am from originally. I put the remainder of my clothes in an army-navy surplus bag and
hitchhiked back to WI. Needless to say...it was a long walk.
I had all kinds of crazy notions of revenge in my mind and I ultimately DID get it. I went ahead and did something she always was telling me I
wasn't good enough/old enough/wealthy enough to get into...namely selling real estate.
Fourteen months later when the divorce was finalized her financial statements showed that she had blown the entire $42K, had our vehicle repossessed,
was dumped by the douchebag wearing my suits, and living in her parents basement. My reported income for the year was $110K, and I drove a nice new
VW Passat. Two years after that, I met the love of my life and married her.
Revenge is good. Revenge is sweet.
However the kind of revenge that will hurt that clown THE MOST is the kind where YOU ACCOMPLISH what he is
incapable of or that he always discouraged you from.
It takes longer, and this sort of Revenge requires a lot more work...but the payoff is worth it.