The Bible with emoticons.

What if the bible was written with emoticons?

How would the interpretation change on crucial
subjects if the emoticon wasnt what you'd expect
from the bible passage?

*this is the first and only time I will use emoticons. ever.
And I'm sorry for doing this to the bible. But not too sorry.


And Jesus wept

Or sometimes exactly what you'd think :

Thou Shalt Not Kill

Here's a few more:

Thou shalt not make idols of any kind

Honor Thy father and mother

“This is what the Lord Almighty says... ‘Now go and strike Amalek and devote to destruction all that they have. Do not spare them, but kill both man and woman, child and infant, ox and sheep, camel and donkey.’” (1 Samuel 15:3)

“Slaves, submit yourselves to your masters with all respect, not only to the good and gentle but also to the cruel.” (1 Peter 2:18):

Yes I'm sure there is a great verse and emoticon
for the blaspheme of my thread but I'll take my chances.

Please leave a favorite of yours.

reply to post by sealing


The Bible with emoticons

That's my favorite.

X.

Happy shall he be, that taketh and dasheth thy little ones against the stones.

reply to post by sealing


Malichi 2:3 "Behold, I will coorupt your seed and spread DUNG upon your faces."

Genesis 30:37-39 "Jacob, however, took fresh-cut branches from poplar, almond and plane trees and made white stripes on them by peeling the bark and exposing the white inner wood of the branches. Then he placed the peeled branches in all the watering troughs, so that they would be directly in front of the flocks when they came to drink. When the flocks were in heat and came to drink, they mated in front of the branches. And they bore young that were streaked or speckled or spotted."

Originally posted by Xoanon
reply to post by sealing

 

The Bible with emoticons

That's my favorite.

X.

I gotta say in all honesty.
You have the best post ever to that headline.
Well done.

Originally posted by boncho
Happy shall he be, that taketh and dasheth thy little ones against the stones.

Best one imo. Do you happen to know the scripture number thingy for that? I'd like to have that one for future reference. It's gotta be the most shocking thing I've heard Yet about the Bible!

reply to post by FugitiveSoul


Sounds like a little wizardry going on there. Doesn't it?

Kind of like casting lots to decide who the "new" 12th disciple would be.

Acts 1:26

26And they gave forth their lots; and the lot fell upon Matthias; and he was numbered with the eleven apostles.

reply to post by Klassified


What kind of sorcery IS this?!