.To My Children: Thank You For Everything.

J & T I just wanted to take a little time and let the world( sort of) know how much I love you two. It;s been a wild ride for the three of us. Raising you two alone was a thank less job. As I used to think. But now that your grown up( sort of) 25 & 27. I look back and see it all in a different light.

I know how hard it was for you daughter being that girl in school who did'nt have a mom. You did, but she was as you know, now where to be found. You found a way to get through all that. You are as thick skinned as I have ever seen. You were also wild as a honey badger!!! Still are in alot of ways, sorry for that St.Patty's day Birthday of yours, take that up with your mom.

You ran off to Toronto at 18. I was scared to death for you. I knew I would never see you again. Now all that looks like anchient history. I still worry about you, I'm your dad, I allways will. Just not as much, and I want wear it on my sleeve. I promise.

My son, where to start with you. I can relate to you more than your sister. Your a man, I'm a man. It's a man thing. But your still my little boy, allways will be no matter how old you get. I know how school was for you. It was a horror. ADD/HD ritalin, I wished we didnt have had to go that route, but we did. Asthma, the breathing treatments at school. Son, I know how hard that was for you. I know the stigma it gave you while you were in school. I'm proud of the way YOU handled it. You handled it better than me.

I know how hard it was for the two of you dealing with your birth mom all these years. I hope I handled that one correctly. I am proud of the two of you for being able to overcome those times and form a relationship with her now. It show's me the type of humans I raised..

My son, thanks for introducing me to your now step-mom& my three step-sons. When you were 14 & wanted me to meet your new friend Eric's mom . I've been here ever since.. I know it sounds corny, but she and I knew as soon as we meet. Thank you son.

WE as Three, went through alot growing up. It was'nt easy on my end being both mom & dad. At times I failed miserably. Then at times the success's were to numerous to count. You two are the most successfull things I have ever done. That I am proud of. I am proud of the two of you.

I am not a rich man,money wise that is. But I am rich in so many ways. I'm the youngest of six brothers & sisters. All still living. I watched my mom & dad .grow old and pass away, they knew my kids, my kids knew them. I watched my kids grow up into two fine young adults & i am married to the most wonderful woman in the world.

Yea, I'm rich in many ways. I just wanted to thank the two of you. Last year when your Nanna passed away it was really hard, son I leaned on you pretty hard during those 4 months. You held me up at times and did'nt even know you were. At each juncture of that 4 month decline, YOU were the one by my side, everytime. When I cried you were there. I have never told you what that meant to me. Even on here, I can't find the words.

Yea, you two are MY children. And I am proud of the two of you. Proud of all the little things that make you two who you are. Compassion, respect, and trust. You two got the message through all the B.S. of growing up. Neither of you have ever questioned my decisions or my actions. Thank you.

That I am the most proud of. Thank you two for being MY children. I am a rich man indeed. Love you two.

P.S. Allways remember, The two rules of life. 1. Don 't sweat the small stuff. 2. Everthing is small stuff.

That's nice to do for your children (if you're like me, they always will be "children" in your mind). So many times, we just assume that they know and that we don't need to say these things. Writing it is a nice touch.

Originally posted by openyourmind1262
Neither of you have ever questioned my decisions or my actions. Thank you.

How'd you pull that one off?

reply to post by openyourmind1262

Excellently written and heartwarming post. I have just one question. Have you shared this with your children?

It is so important what you just did. Every chance we get, we should celebrate the ones we love. Our lives turn on a dime and living like you know that makes everyday sweeter.

Your relationship with your children sounds like it has been and is a good one. The ups and downs are all part and parcel.

Very touching, your post. Thank you for being willing to share with your online family. I hope you inspire others to do the same.

reply to post by Iamonlyhuman


I don't really know. Taught them alot by example. Really did not pull any punches when they were little as to how hard life really is. I allways said to them " Life's hard, get a good helmet".

reply to post by LightSpeedDriver


Yes I have, Friday was the one year date of my mom. their Nanna's funeral. We were to gether over the weekend as St.Pattys day is my daughter's b-day. The 16th was my moms. They told me things I never knew. Like how much their friends like me. How their friends when they were little thought I was the "coolest dad ever".

And what surprised me the most is the amount of respect that's showed to me by their friends. I let em know how hard it was, but at the same time how it defined me as man & a father.

reply to post by Iamschist


Your kids are your legacy. Their the reason we work, save, do without, & fight. All for our children. If I die tomorrow. All that matters is if I did the right thing by my children. Did I make the world a better place for you the time I was here. I hope I did. All I can ask is do the same for yours.

I know this sounds sappy comimg from a man. But you really do have to hug your kids, talk to your kids, tell your kids just how much you love them.. You think their not hearing you. You'd be damn surprised, at how much they really do hear.

reply to post by openyourmind1262

If only more people thought like you did.

reply to post by LightSpeedDriver
Thank you. I take that as a very high compliment... The problem today is parents don't take the time to be parents. They let the T.V. do it. Or the x-box or playstation.. They think school is there to teach their kids right from wrong. No it's not. That's your job as a parent.

No school can teach your child how to be a decent human being. That's your job. It's a parents job to teach all the things the school does not. And there's plenty the schools don't teach. I don't know about the schools in Britian but the school system here in America is in the crapper, has been for years.

My kids I hope are not the exception to the rule. But I have seen their friends with parents that , well no other way to say it, their just shatty parents. Good kids, bad parents. That makes for an un-bright future for the child.

Parents today, arent the parents of my parents time. Somethings need not change. I looked up to my parents. I wanted to be like my dad.My parents as corny as it may sound, were my hero's. My mom & dad were the best, we were dirt poor & we did not have much. But the one thing I knew I had at home was two parents that loved me unconditionally.

My parents taught me, trust, respect, compassion. With those lesson's, we all can be our kids hero's.And they can grow up & teach those lessons to their little ones. And maybe after a while, the world will be a little better place. Peace.

reply to post by openyourmind1262

I had to compliment you as it's something I never dared to do as a younger man, being a father. In hindsight it was the right decision as I am now single after 10 years with the same woman who did want a child but there was always an excuse not to (from her side). The house needs fixing up first, need a better job, more moeny, etc, etc. In short, it never happened. I wouldn't wish single-parentship on anyone though so it's not all bad. As I got older the idea slowly became more comfortable but being 40 now, I don't think it would be fair to the child to have such an aged parent but that is in no way an insult to people that do have them at an older age. I just want to be by myself now. Well, my cat can be a bit of a baby too sometimes.

And indeed, many do leave the kids to be brought up by others but as you rightly mention parents today are not the same as yesteryear and I think it's partly due to the changes forced upon society. In my father's youth, most women stayed at home and cared for the home and the children. People owned their own homes, had a job that paid enough to keep things running and spent much time with their children. Compared to now? Well, from what I see many couples are forced to both go out to work and pay a stranger for childcare. Usually the lower earner will take a part-time job to try and fit in with the times the creche or child-minder works. Many people also don't seem to own their own homes anymore. So, instead of quality time at home, little Timmy gets a bunchload of gadgets and plenty of time on his own with little parental supervision. This is more a problem in the cities where they can often get into much trouble and Mom and Dad just don't know. The parents come home tired and moody and have little energy to do anything apart from cook dinner and collapse on the sofa.

All I can honestly say school taught me was to recognise and sometimes fear authority, basic arithmetic and basic literacy skills. (I went to UK standard schools) I would rather have been taught how to be a nice person, how to be happy and maybe how to be useful in life but alas, that is apparently asking too much these days. Ignorance and intolerance seem to be spiralling out of control along with unemployment, food and necessities prices and many other things besides. It took me a long time to grow up and I'm not convinced I'm all the way there yet...

Be well.

reply to post by LightSpeedDriver


Your attitude is a joy to behold!! I wish you well. Yea I have one of those baby cats too. All 18 pounds of him!!